Punch (29.1855)

104

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

[September 15, 1855.

a «jtat7Ttr T?nR 'I'm? TinT.ew mtAT>nc! wil-h the mornbg dew stDl glittering on it,—a mto, moreover, who

^Uit iJriL xiUJ.tts.ft bUAHUo. ' could impale either man or woman, if wickedly Whiggisb, upon his

, HE moral gallantry displayed ™'h ^J*® ease of Aeart> louf enjoyment of a schoolboy

at head quarters is only ™n 8 a COrktm^m ,throush fhe bo,wels °* a cockchafer. Poly-

pmiflliPfl hv th* ntivdn/l PI5EMDS never took a human marrow-bone with greater enjoyment,
Sage exhimtedPbSre ™™ Zt^fT" ^^^thar bellowiogs tharx did Christo-
SebastoDol What a darinsr Worth feel and utter, when he devoured alive, bones and all, a

defiance of nublic oninion : wretched Radical! At such meals, his countryman, Sawney Beane,
has been <-hown at the 'was n0^ a ^u^er feeder. At Christopher's Nodes Ambrosiance
Horse Guards, if we are to \ human heai;ts ^ere served up-Lke the peacock's brains at Lucdllus'
credit the following para-1 suPPers—a hundred to a dish. But these wTere strong-stomached times,
graph in the South-Eastern ] ^ rePutation—like a pullet, the whiter the better—was a mere mouth-
Gazette ' ' 1 *"u^' Martin, dressed by the cook Christopher (he cooked his

own dishes), was served up as " an Irish jackass." Joseph Hume lav
» Sergeant Brodte-On Mon- on the Aboard as "a poor creature in mind, soul, and heart"

day. Sergeant Brodie, of thw , -p, rn.,1. , „ , .,. ,, \TC/~, ' t.

Fi,st Royal Dragoons, whose con-, -DROUgham smoked as a Billingsgate fish-wife, M Ctjlloch as an
dnctin preventing the duel in con- obscure and insolent lout,"—and so forth; for we may not dwell upon
nation with the'practical joking,'. half the number of dishes that, from month to month, was served up by

has repeatedly been referred to in j j j A ' ' p
these columns, proceeded, accord- ; tUe Apiuan CHRISTOPHER.

ing to his route, to Chatham, to Well, as we have said, certain party men bad strong stomachs in
undergo the usual inspection pre-; those days, and they, doubtless, enjoyed these things, even as a Kaffir
Sr^e^'s sfrvicff JS™ I enjoys his rough meal of swine intestines. When, however, the col-
Adjutant Webster, who prompt-' lected works of Wilson were first talked about, timid folks feared that
ed the duel, and ordered his men the Nodes would make no part of the reprint: they feared that they
to'knock the Sergeant down with ;might be auovred to pass away with the offal, the dead rats and

the butt end ot their carbines if -i ° 1 , ... . 1 j_ i i. i j x 1 •

he resisted being taken to the ; drowned kittens that were once so buoyant, so biting and so scratching,
guard-room, for preventing its' in the kindred columns of the Age and Satirist. Such timorous men
con8umruaHon,has been promoted knew DOt tjje stu£F whereof Professor Ferrier was compounded.
("wu?^pI^Cthp'"erlet,,t;lirfA L I That conscientious editor has thought it a solemn duty to reproduce all

the dishes compounded and gloated over by the living Christopher.
They were sweet and fragrant to the nostrils of an age when Toryism
tyrannised in the Commons, and doubted on the Woolsack; and, like
spices extracted from mummies, they must have a smack, a flavour
still. We must in 1S55 still enjoy the memory of a good, eccentric
man, as "an Irish jackass," must still laugh heartily to have Lord
Brougham, a "Billingsgate fish-wife,"—still acknowledge the delicious
jest, subtly conveved, in Mr. M'Culloch as "an obscure and insolent
lout!"

With an industry only equalled by his conscientiousness has Pro-
fessor Terrier so far acquitted himself of his edition of Nodes
Ambrosiance. The more pleasant part remains to be told. For rewatd
of the Professor's services, the learned gentleman has been offeredi
under the operation of Sir Benjamin Hall's Metropolitan Act, a very
distinguished position in the sewers. Here, certainly, we have the
right man in the right place.

rewarded bv his discharge from
the Service!"

Military justice is of a na'ure so peculiar that we beg to suggest an
illustration of it in 1 he shape of a statue to be placed in front of the
building in Sf. James's Park which is consecrated to the martial
authorities. The statue of Military Justice should be represented with
the sword of "course, and also with the bandage, but let the latter,
instead of being tied over both eyes, cover only one eye, and let that
one be the right.

LETTERS REWARDED.-'NOCTES AMBROSIAM.

It is not to be expected of flesh and blood—for Punch is no longer
ligneous; Punch, as Samuel Johnson would now allow, has feelings—
it is not for Punch, then, to suffer any reward vouchsafed by authority
to letters, to pass unheeded, unacknowledged. We know not, indeed,
what may be in store for literature. We believe that we violate no j

confidence—and if we do, we cannot help it; joy, in its expression, is j ^ FRENCH BULL TAKEN BY THE HORNS,

apt to be incautious—when we state that a late Royal visit to our dear j

and affectionate Allies may abound with much future good to Literature, I John Bull is now a very familiar object in Paris, but an Irish Bull
Art, and Science. France and England mutually feel that they can in | is still a novelty in France, though one of our French contemporaries
no better, no stronger way, consolidate the alliance than by each i has recently favoured us with what almost deserves to be termed the

copying the excellences of each. Therefore, England is about to pay
France the first compliment of imitation. In France, writers, painters,
men of Art and science have, time out of mind, been acknowledged, and
from time to time, in so far as the state could dignify, dignified. Even

Pceuf Gras of Bulls of Irish origin. In speaking of recent events, the
Constitutional observes, " We see everywhere in France the invisible
hand of Providence." Our contemporary is, we admit, endowed with
a good deal of penetration, and more than an average share of keen-

in the time of Louis the Fourteenth, Versailles was little more than 1 sightedness, but, his being able to "see everywhere" that which is
a palace-of-ease to poets, dramatists, painters, sculptors. They were " invisible," evinces an amount of visual power which we should not
the birds of the sun ; more considered by the Grand Monarch, than ! have given him credit for. When a writer begins an article by saying
were the ducks of St. James by his brother king and bought flunkey, ! "Nous voyonspartout Vinvisible" &c. &c, we decline trusting our eyes
Charles the Second. And so, with a difference, it was with Uncle 1 any further in the perusal of his remarks, lest we should see something
Napoleon; and so it is again to be with Nephew Louts. This that is not to be seen, or Jest in what our eye rests upon, we may be sr
pleasing fact was made very evident, on the Queen's visit to Versailles j unfortunate as to see nothing. When a writer begins seeing the
and other places, where men of genius were invited, and—no spoons | invisible, the chances are, that he will proceed to utter some unutterable
were missing! _ [stuff, or to touch upon that which is not tangible, and we therefore

It will be remembered that our excellent ambassador, Lord Cowley, : think it better to drop what he has let drop, by putting down the paper,
has been attacked in the columns of the Times—(the usual pillory for
persecuted goodness, misinterpreted benevolence,)—because, forsooth,
he was not disposed to acknowledge the existence of English jurymen ;
individuals, mixed up with literature and science, whom his Lordship,
by means of his Lordship's bellicose porter, kept at extremest arm's
length. "Literature and science not admitted" were written—but, in
shortest hand—upon that porter's forehead. It is now to be otherwise :
the frontal notice is to be forthwith erased: and, in obedience to the
advice of a distinguished Prince, Lord Cowley is hencefonh to receive
men of letters, Art, and science. His Lordship felt that he might have
justified his late ignorance of English jury-ren by the example set in
the Royal palaces of Great Britain, but his Lordship is a courtier, and

Translation and Traduction.

Some of the Handbooks to Paris are very good, but others, we think,
err in carrying to excess the attempt to render the names of Parisian
localities into our vernacular. For example, we have no objection to a
writer who tries to make his reader feel at home by calling the Rue des
Marais, Marsh Lane, or translating Rue cFEnfer into Holywell Street.
But we consider that he goes too far in calling the Rue des Trots Cou-
ronnes, Fifteen Shilling Street, terming the Rue de Malte, Beer Street,
or denoting the Avenue des Anes as Alderman's Walk. This is what
as a courtier, held his tongue. ! Ophelia calls, " wearing your Rue with a difference."

However, reward of the right men who have written the right books,

chiselled the right statues, and made the right discoveries, will hence- j A Accidental Joke,
iorth be ot daily occurrence. The first person, happily selected to

illustrate the new and better order of things is Professor Ferrier of "We met a fool in the forest" who had the audacity to ask ua

Edinburgh. The Professor, it, may not be generally known, is the the following conundrum :—

editor of the collected works of Profkssor Wilson ; a man of very Why cannot the proprietor of this forest fell his own timber?—

raried genius—a man who could dash off a Highland landscape, all fresh Because no one is allowed to cut, when it 'a his own deal.