DOI issue:
October 6, 1855
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16616#0146
134
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
[October 6. 1855.
EVERYBODY'S OPINION.
"Dear. Old Punch, "Sebastopol, Catherine Street.
"I ain't an Artist, and I ain't an Author—but this is our idea of what ought to
he done in the Crimea with ou? trench-loving Generalissimo.
" Yours to command,
"John Ramrod, (-Rifles)."
PITY FOR THE FOE,
Lay the might of Russia low !
" Pity for the prostrate foe ? "
No, my Bright, my Gladstone, no ■
Russell, Graham, say not so.
Let Ambition's mangled slave,
Cruel, barbarous, but brave,
Not in vain for mercy crave;
Him, the unit, spare and save.
But what pity for the horde,
And their Czar, on earth who pour'd
Porth the plague of fire and sword,
Can humanity afford ?
Pity, such as that we take,
On the crush'd and writhing snake,
Smitten, in a thorny brake,
With a strong arm and a stake.
Pity ?—yes, indeed; the same
As, his sting about to aim
At his own head, girt with flame,
The poor scorpion too might claim.
Pity—as we do the fall
Of a tiger shot—his sprawl,
And his frantic dying squall,
And his glaring green eyeball.
Oh, the lost, the brave, the good !
Oh, the waste of noble blood 1
Pity Russia !—he who could,
Would he like a leg of wood ?
" Pity for the fallen great ? "
Pshaw!—that hackeyM cant abate,
Strike, with all your strength and weight,
And strike down the Robber State!
A Coiffeur's Discovery.—No wonder that
we hear of curling Smoke, when it has the
fire-irons applied to it so repeatedly!
RACHEL AND JONATHAN.
Rachel—France will be happy to hear it—has given satisfaction in
America. Just before her debut, the Yankee critics very properly re-
marked, that a most important epoch in her life was approaching, and
that the question, whether she were " clever " or not, was to be settled
by " an audience as intellectual and subtle as that which first sat in
judgment upon her." Indeed, the value of the test was increased by
the fact,—recorded in the same papers—that the American mind was a
tabula rasa in regard to her, and that the intellectual and subtle audience
assemblrd in some doubt as to what they were to see or hear, one
journal having described her as " a great danseuse," and another having
congratulated "the lovers of good music " upon her arrival. However,
New York has now found out—and of course talks as glibly of the
discovery as if it were of ancient date—that there were some French
Dramatists called Racine and Corneille, who wrote "the most
boring plays ever heard in America," and that Rachel really delivers
their language brilliantly, and with a very pure French accent. Nay,
rushing into extremes, as usual, the Americans actually find histrionic
merit in the bundle of Hebrew sticks whom Rachel takes about with
her to fill the other characters, the innocent Yankees being unaware
that all the acting permitted to those articles is the acting as foils to
herself. Let it be added, that Rachel's slight figure has been duly
appreciated, and that the leading New York critic describes it as, "very
light physical timber." Punch felicitates Paris upon the endorsement
of its bills—play-biils—by New York.
The Jumping Wafer.
The priests in France now announce a new miracle about twice a-
week. The last is a jump which the " wafer " made, in church, from
the hand of a person who ought not to have touched it, to the missal of
a very devout lady, and thence into her mouth, which happened, provi-
dentially, to be open at the time. This was clever, for a wafer, though
we confess the greater miracle seems to be, that a priest should print
such a story and not be sent to St. Pelagie as a rogue, or to Bicetre as a
fool. However, the Jumping Wafer is the last addition to the repertoire
of the Roman Catholic Wizard of the South, and is a worthy companion
to the Winking Virgin.
GERMAN CRITICISM.
{Compounded from certain popular Berlin reeipes)
If a German critic were describing some of our most popular per-
formers, it would be probably thus that he would largely qualify them:
Benjamin Webster, Esq.—" The neyeramessmakingBenjaminwith
NapoleonheadedandNapoleonmindedgeniusthatallthingstouchingandallt
hingsadorningwithequaltalentontheBritishPublicasonthefiddleplays."
E. Wright, Esq.—" The jolljjovialwinkinggaggingdearmopsywopsy
bricksywicksysonofMomuswithstitciiinthesideprovokinghumouranafrom
overlaughterdeeptfiirstonlywithbeertobequenchedexcitingtalentthatolfe!!
withhis'BoyBelievingyou'roundasabarrelribbedPaulinendlessmazesoffan
losesitself."
Miss Woolgar.—" The manysidedfacilelitheblitheProteanplasticwo
nderbeautifulboygirlwomaufairydevilpoachergipsytigerandmostaccompli
shedactresseverdancingeversinginglaughinggailyandbeautifullysighingcr
yingdyingsuchasatalltimesonourkneesevenwithoutapockethanctkerchieft.
okneeluponcanneverbesufficientlyadmired."
S. Phelps, Esq:—"The manageractormightymajesticmagneticmirth
fulinthedivinerealmsof heavenly Shakspearedomwithoutarivalnearthethro
nereigninghighesteitherwiththeearsof^o^o^ourfanciesirresistiblytotick}
eorwiththewandofPro^roourheartsgentlytotouchwithgeniustintedquali
tieseminentlygifted."
Mrs. Keeley.—" The domesticquainttragicfamiliarextravagantnatur
alkillingmeltingexstacyproducingskytransportingspoutascendingchimne
ydescendingkitchenstirringparlourmovingatticconvulsingkidglovesplitti
ngbuttonburstingaudheartyappetiteforouroystersuppersprovokingactres
sdeeplyhonouredandofoneofEngland'ssmallestbutgreatestcomediansofth
enameoffloBERTbutmorefamiliarlyasBoBKEELEYknowntheequallyhonou
redwife." _
" That Air Three Tacts." (From an American Paper.)
" Washington's tomb is in ruins and mire,"
" Barnum's new mansion's as fine as can be."
Moral—That Yankeedom approbates higher
The "selling" one's fellows than setting them tree.
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
[October 6. 1855.
EVERYBODY'S OPINION.
"Dear. Old Punch, "Sebastopol, Catherine Street.
"I ain't an Artist, and I ain't an Author—but this is our idea of what ought to
he done in the Crimea with ou? trench-loving Generalissimo.
" Yours to command,
"John Ramrod, (-Rifles)."
PITY FOR THE FOE,
Lay the might of Russia low !
" Pity for the prostrate foe ? "
No, my Bright, my Gladstone, no ■
Russell, Graham, say not so.
Let Ambition's mangled slave,
Cruel, barbarous, but brave,
Not in vain for mercy crave;
Him, the unit, spare and save.
But what pity for the horde,
And their Czar, on earth who pour'd
Porth the plague of fire and sword,
Can humanity afford ?
Pity, such as that we take,
On the crush'd and writhing snake,
Smitten, in a thorny brake,
With a strong arm and a stake.
Pity ?—yes, indeed; the same
As, his sting about to aim
At his own head, girt with flame,
The poor scorpion too might claim.
Pity—as we do the fall
Of a tiger shot—his sprawl,
And his frantic dying squall,
And his glaring green eyeball.
Oh, the lost, the brave, the good !
Oh, the waste of noble blood 1
Pity Russia !—he who could,
Would he like a leg of wood ?
" Pity for the fallen great ? "
Pshaw!—that hackeyM cant abate,
Strike, with all your strength and weight,
And strike down the Robber State!
A Coiffeur's Discovery.—No wonder that
we hear of curling Smoke, when it has the
fire-irons applied to it so repeatedly!
RACHEL AND JONATHAN.
Rachel—France will be happy to hear it—has given satisfaction in
America. Just before her debut, the Yankee critics very properly re-
marked, that a most important epoch in her life was approaching, and
that the question, whether she were " clever " or not, was to be settled
by " an audience as intellectual and subtle as that which first sat in
judgment upon her." Indeed, the value of the test was increased by
the fact,—recorded in the same papers—that the American mind was a
tabula rasa in regard to her, and that the intellectual and subtle audience
assemblrd in some doubt as to what they were to see or hear, one
journal having described her as " a great danseuse," and another having
congratulated "the lovers of good music " upon her arrival. However,
New York has now found out—and of course talks as glibly of the
discovery as if it were of ancient date—that there were some French
Dramatists called Racine and Corneille, who wrote "the most
boring plays ever heard in America," and that Rachel really delivers
their language brilliantly, and with a very pure French accent. Nay,
rushing into extremes, as usual, the Americans actually find histrionic
merit in the bundle of Hebrew sticks whom Rachel takes about with
her to fill the other characters, the innocent Yankees being unaware
that all the acting permitted to those articles is the acting as foils to
herself. Let it be added, that Rachel's slight figure has been duly
appreciated, and that the leading New York critic describes it as, "very
light physical timber." Punch felicitates Paris upon the endorsement
of its bills—play-biils—by New York.
The Jumping Wafer.
The priests in France now announce a new miracle about twice a-
week. The last is a jump which the " wafer " made, in church, from
the hand of a person who ought not to have touched it, to the missal of
a very devout lady, and thence into her mouth, which happened, provi-
dentially, to be open at the time. This was clever, for a wafer, though
we confess the greater miracle seems to be, that a priest should print
such a story and not be sent to St. Pelagie as a rogue, or to Bicetre as a
fool. However, the Jumping Wafer is the last addition to the repertoire
of the Roman Catholic Wizard of the South, and is a worthy companion
to the Winking Virgin.
GERMAN CRITICISM.
{Compounded from certain popular Berlin reeipes)
If a German critic were describing some of our most popular per-
formers, it would be probably thus that he would largely qualify them:
Benjamin Webster, Esq.—" The neyeramessmakingBenjaminwith
NapoleonheadedandNapoleonmindedgeniusthatallthingstouchingandallt
hingsadorningwithequaltalentontheBritishPublicasonthefiddleplays."
E. Wright, Esq.—" The jolljjovialwinkinggaggingdearmopsywopsy
bricksywicksysonofMomuswithstitciiinthesideprovokinghumouranafrom
overlaughterdeeptfiirstonlywithbeertobequenchedexcitingtalentthatolfe!!
withhis'BoyBelievingyou'roundasabarrelribbedPaulinendlessmazesoffan
losesitself."
Miss Woolgar.—" The manysidedfacilelitheblitheProteanplasticwo
nderbeautifulboygirlwomaufairydevilpoachergipsytigerandmostaccompli
shedactresseverdancingeversinginglaughinggailyandbeautifullysighingcr
yingdyingsuchasatalltimesonourkneesevenwithoutapockethanctkerchieft.
okneeluponcanneverbesufficientlyadmired."
S. Phelps, Esq:—"The manageractormightymajesticmagneticmirth
fulinthedivinerealmsof heavenly Shakspearedomwithoutarivalnearthethro
nereigninghighesteitherwiththeearsof^o^o^ourfanciesirresistiblytotick}
eorwiththewandofPro^roourheartsgentlytotouchwithgeniustintedquali
tieseminentlygifted."
Mrs. Keeley.—" The domesticquainttragicfamiliarextravagantnatur
alkillingmeltingexstacyproducingskytransportingspoutascendingchimne
ydescendingkitchenstirringparlourmovingatticconvulsingkidglovesplitti
ngbuttonburstingaudheartyappetiteforouroystersuppersprovokingactres
sdeeplyhonouredandofoneofEngland'ssmallestbutgreatestcomediansofth
enameoffloBERTbutmorefamiliarlyasBoBKEELEYknowntheequallyhonou
redwife." _
" That Air Three Tacts." (From an American Paper.)
" Washington's tomb is in ruins and mire,"
" Barnum's new mansion's as fine as can be."
Moral—That Yankeedom approbates higher
The "selling" one's fellows than setting them tree.