Punch (36.1859)

220

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

[Mat 28, 1859.

POP GOES THE RIFLE!

(A New Song to an Old Time, volunteered by Mr. Punch.)

ith news of War the papers
teem,

The Funds arc downward
going:

Athirst for blood the Eagles
scream,

111 winds abroad are blow-
ing ;

England would fain Lorn

THE VISCOUNT'S RETURN.

Tin-, following announcement in the Morning Post is very likely to
be misunderstood on the other side of the Channel:—

"Viscount Viixiers has derived considerable benefit from his sojourn at Pau ;
in fact, his health is quite recruited. The noble Viscount and Viscountess, in
consequence, intend to return home sooner than was expected."

Our gallant what-shall-we-call-'ems, if not allies, in perusing the
above notification with that intense interest with which they regard
the British aristocracy, will of course confound the distinguished
nobleman, whose recovery of health, and approaching restoration to
his native land, they will rejoice to learn, with the hon. Member for
Lambeth. As sure as fate, the report current in the salons of Paris,
striferetrain i and published in the Parisian newspapers, will, with that slight varia-

]Nor join the battle-storm i f[on 0f English nomenclature and spelling inevitable in such a case,
, m '• . , , , I declare the happv recovery and homeward destination of that great

And tis that she at peace j iorci 0f t}le House of Parliament, Wiscount Villtams.

may be,
Our rifle clubs we 're form-
. i

m

Chorus.
Up and down the Funds

may go,
Our peace-cry none shall
stifle:

A SENSIBLE SPREAD.

Cressy and Poictiers have told

How they fought their foemen;
By practice they their prowess gained,

By practice so may we too:
And till that prowess be attained,

Our rifle sights we '11 see to !
Chorus. Lp, then ! Down the gauntlet throw !
Let none with England trifle:
Here, where once twang went the bow.
Por goes the Rifle!

Some may say they can't afford

To spare their precious leisure :
Some may fear they may be bored,
That practice won't be pleasure :
Willing hands there are enow,

Brave hearts—who can doubt them ?
Form then, and the skulkers show

We can do without them!
Chorus. Up in arms the country throw,
The cost is but a trifle:
Be ready aye to fight the foe—
Pop goes the Rifle !

We are no alarmists, scared

By fear of French invasion ;
Yet 'tis well to be prepared

'Gainst War's dread occasion.
Touch us not, we '11 touch not you ;

We own no wish for fighting;
But lest a War you drive us to,

Our practice-butts we're sighting.
Chorus. Up ! then, Up ! Ye liifle Greens !
Let none your ardour stifle :
Tanyere me noli means
Pop goes the Rifle !

In Celebration of the Anniversary of Hep, Majesty's birth day on
the 19th instant, Sir Edward Bulwer Lytton, according to a
fashionable announcement, invited the Colonial Governors now in
England, and other gentlemen connected with his department, to a
>e ready aye to meet tJie j banquet at the Clarendon Hotel, described as a full dress dinner. • That
*oe • pi I's tne s01t' 0 dinner! Raw rump-steaks are all very well to train

1 op goes the Kifle . Bill Sayeks upon; but for any set of civdised beings, how much
F lishmen in dav^ of old better is a dinner that is fully dressed than one where everything is
Were world-renowned as overdone!
bowmen,

DIVERS' PERFORMANCES.

At the Pearl Fishery at Aripo, we read that, " Bates, the chief of
the European- divers, was under water for three hours." On many
occasions of danger, it is as difficult to keep your head above water as
under it. For instance, there is that clever diver, Lord Derby, who has
been down to the lowest depths in the hope of picking up a stray vote or
two. Low as he and his confederates have sunk,—and they could not
have sunk lower,—they have not fished up more than twenty or twenty-
five of the precious "pearls of Parliament" that they were diving for.
Now, when Lord Derby again presents himself before the nation on
the troubled sea of pontics, we should like to know for what period he
is likely to keep his head above water? Will you give him three days,
or three hours, or even three minutes? and, once under, we are afraid
that his Lordship will never come up again.

" No Followers Allowed."

Though Louis Napoleon and Fran cis Joseph are at open war,
yet they are friendly and unanimous at least upon one point. There is
one little bit of neutral ground upon which they meet and join hands,
and are ready to join arms too, if necessary, to keep it clear of all
villanous intruders, This glorious unanimity of two, is to the^ effect
that no newspaper correspondent shall be allowed to follow the French
or Austrian army. However, it scarcely needed this warlike demon-
stration to prove'to us what enemies both Emperors were, and always
have been, to a Free Press. Much as they dread each other, they
know they have reason to dread the Press a great deal more.

An Additional Duty on Paper.—Russia, Austria, and Sardinia
have suspended cash payments.