Punch (64.1873)

158

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

(Apbil 19. 1873.

"Mum" when the
supposed Mistress

and the rest, without new taxation by Exchequer
PUNCH'S ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT. „Bo°^. if jQanpes are unlucky.

5. He takes on halt the Sugar Daty, alter May 8th.
'was Monday, April 7.— 6. He takes One Penny off the Income-tax. Here he
Master Slender cried probably Winked at his Private Mind, and mur-

mured something about Surcharges, which enable
him very well to afford a slight expenditure of
Conscience Money. Oar Income-tax is now to be
Three Pence, which, he added, yields quite as
much as when Sir Robert Peel laid it on, at
Seven Pence, in 1842.
. He exempts from Taxation Hotel Servants and
those " of persons who deal in intoxicating
liquors." It must be allowed that the latter have
been his generous Benefactors, and from his point
of view ought to be rewarded.

8. Thus, he reduces the surplus to £291,000.

9. During the year he will pay the Americans their
Three Millions odd, reduce The Debt by £6,000,000,
and relieve taxation by £2,885,000.

There was the usual provisional comment. The Agri-
culturists complained that nothing was done for them.
But, if signs are to be trusted,—

" Yes, honest Farmer, you may trust our rhyme ;
Something will follow—at a fitting time."

Sir Wilfrid Lawson made a very fair protest against
any rejoicing at our having Drunk ourselves out of the
Alabama difficulty. We have doae it, though. Sir
Walter Scott quotes—

Ann Page was to
cry " Budget; " but
his experiment was
not so successful as
to induce the House
of Commons to imi-
tate it to-night.
Although Mr. Lowe
was to proclaim Bud-
get, the House was
so far from being
Mum that it asked
two columns of ques-
tions before it would
allow the Chancel-
lor oe the Ex-
chequer to get at
business.

One query was to
the point, and it was
raised by Mr. Sta-
pleton, who quietly
demanded whether
(recollecting Ameri-
can unpleasantness) " £ the parish, the parish the parish,

British subjects were °>^U\r , V . > n. -p

*. t- u„ ~~~4-~a Thev ve hangit trie Minister, stickit the Precentor,

not to be. prevented fi it th(J Ch« rch and ^ ^ Bell „

from raising money

to promote the cause He " thinks he should like to have known something of
of Charles the these meritorious people." We have not degenerated.
Seventh in Spain. Warnings were given, from several quarters, against
Mr. Oladstone said that the Crown Lawyers saw nothing illegal in the the present system of assessing the Income-tax.
subscription, and therefore that it would not be interfered with. Well, we ; _ Mr. Lowe said that the country was still on the foil
allowed Garibaldi to obtain arms and money here in order to place Victor [ tide of prosperity.

Emmanuel where he now is, and we suppose that the same rule must apply, i Resolutions in favour of portions of the scheme were
especially as we do not even recognise the Spanish Republic. But if Spain were j agreed to, and the House rose for the holidays, until
not a weak Power, we might hear a little more on this subject. the 21st.

Mr. Chichester Fortescue was, shall we say, a little explosive ?—no, only Touching the weather at this season, Madam, Mr.
a little impressive, in his declaration that the Board of Trade had no favouritism '.Punch would make a Shakspearian remark or two.
which would prevent certain of Mr. Plimsoll's accusations from being fully ! Mercutio accuses Benvolio of " falling out with a Tailor
investigated. ! for wearing his new doublet before Easter." Gentlemen

Mr. A:?rton made an observation which Mr. Punch—not that gentleman's never fall out with tailors, except when they make bad
most devoted admirer—records with pleasure. In reference to some Mosaics in ' clothes, or want to be paid. But any tailor, or other
the Central Hall, Mr. Ayrton said that the artist received £150 for his design, 1 person, who put on new garments before this present
while the mere mechanics who carried it out received £500 He did not cali : Easter, must have been an idiot. Pandarus says that if
this encouragement of Art; and iu reference to Frescoes, he had determined not Cressida were not his relative " she would seem as fair
to go on with them, desiring to have works of Art, and not revivals of the works i to him on Friday as Helen on Sunday." All the ladies
of a semi-barbarous period of decoration. It is clear that the iEdile has been ' whom Mr. Punch beheld on Good Friday looked pinched
thinking over these matters, and that some correct ideas are beginning to dawn i and reproachful, thanks to the East Wind, and things
on his mind. were not mended on Easter Sunday. Posterity may like

In reply to complaint by Mr. G. Bentinck about Counts Out, Mr. Gladstone \ to know that the general condition of the English mind
said that he was not in the House on the preceding Friday, as he was unable to at this period of history was that of unadulterated Sulki-
leave his bed all day. At this the Liberals broke into loud cheering. They | ness—a reflection of the skies,
reminded Mr. Punch of what Cousin Phoenix said about the duty, in his days,
of cheering whenever Mr. Pitt's name was mentioned, and about the House
being ready to applaud if a Member had announced that Mr. Pitt had tumbled
down in a fit in the lobby.

Mr. C. Bentinck mentioned that Mr. Chadwick had Counted Oat the A mysterious and august transaction was solemnised
House from spite. But he immediately withdrew the un-Parliamentary word, on the evening of Monday last week at the Freemason's
and substituted " Retaliation," which, being a word of six syllables, was of New Hall, in Great Oueen Street, Lincoln's Inn Fields,
course more soothing to the feelings than a word of one. There is a singularly \ This was no less than the fusion of the English and Irish
hidden virtue in polysyllables, and, indeed, in all redundancy of expression. ! Orders of the Knights Templar of the most Ancient and
Tell a man that he is a stupid ass, and he does not, as a rule, look much pleased ; \ Honourable Community of Freemasons. _ The Prince
but tell him that he appears to you to fail in the power of exactitude in appre- I of Wales, as head of the Order, presided, and the

TEMPLARS GRAND AND PETTY.

proceedings concluded with a banquet, whereat, of
course, the usual loyal toasts were drunk in the usual
generous liquors. It is, however, hardly necessary to
mention this circumstance for the purpose of preventing
any mistake about the fusion of the Knights Templar,
which would involve the confusion of that Order with
the Association whose Members modestly style themselves

dating the question at issue, and he smiles, as if you had done him a favour
Mr. C. Bentince also observed that the Opposition always Counted Out with
great judgment, but the Ministerialists did not; a remark not received with
unanimous plaudit.

But then,_ Madam, we got at the Budget for 1873. Mr. Lowe did not make
a very effective speech. Some said that he was not in good form, having been
incensed with his colleagues for not letting him pay off all the Alabama money.

Be this as it may, he spoke briefly- little over the hour—and was a good deal j Good Tempiars, for the sake of a distinction which of
bothered with his figures. His points were these:— course they do not mean to be invidious, but perhaps

1. Unexampled prosperity, in spite of Continental troubles, Strikes, a bad i consider to be insufficiently apparent from deportment,

Harvest, and High Prices. language, and costume.

2. We have a surplus of £5,895,000. -====__:====_-

3. He hoped we should never have to pay another sum of £3,200,000 in '

gold, by referring questions to arbitration. Servant Maid's Song {to her Policeman).—Aria:

4. We shall pay only one half of that sum out of the revenue of the year, " Robert, toi quej'aime ! "