Punch: Punch (75.1878)

October 12, 1878.]

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHAKIVABI.

161

indeed a " brief madness " does not occur to the uncritical spectator
until the dramatist makes Paulina allude, in Act II. Sc. 2, to

" These dangerous unsafe lunes i' the King! "

And, in Act III. Sc. 2, when upbraiding him to his face for his
previous conduct, she says,

" 0 think what they have done,
And then run mad indeed; stark mad ! for all
Thy by-gone fooleries were but spices of it."

But the explanation, for the sake of the audience, comes too late.

Then what an awkward contrivance is the sudden appearance of
Time as Chorus, informing us that " Sixteen years are supposed to
have elapsed" between the last scene of Act III. and the first of
Act IV.

How came this lumbering Time scene to be written in ? I think I
see the true answer. John Hollingshead once suggested that
Shakspeare played the Ghost in Hamlet, because, being Manager,
and having an eye to business, he could run round, in the intervals
between his appearances on the stage, and " count the house; " and
our own Shirley Brooks always insisted on the Divine Williams
being regarded not as a poet crowned with laurel, but as a hard-
working " Actor, Manager, and Author too," going in for rehearsal,
really "meaning business" and inventing it. "By this light,"
then, I see how this Time episode was brought in.

How came it about? Did Mr. Chatterton-Burbage tell Mr.
William Shakspeare that they had a man in the company who
could speak a few lines, and who; having nothing to do in the piece,
was being paid a salary for doing it ? Or, was there a difficulty
about the stage-arrangements, and the Manager wanting to gain
time, asked William if he couldn't shove in something "just to
fill up, eh?" And did William, with ready wit, immediately
reply, "What ? want to get time between the Acts ? Beshrew me,
you shall have Time;" and forthwith going to the prompt-table,
did he seize pen and paper, and write the stage-direction, and the
lines, and saying, "There's plenty of Time for you!" hand the
scrawl to the Theatre copyist ?

Miss Fowler is a graceful, pretty Perdita, and Mr. Edward
Compton as noble a young Florizel as the ingenuous Milkmaid her-
self could wish. Mr. John Ryder as Antigonus was excellent in
his great comic scene with the Baby {Music, "Don't make a noise,
or else you '11 wake the Baby! "—a suggestion for Mr. Karl Meyder
in the orchestra), and I [was really sorry when the Clown (Mr.
S. Calhaem) came on, and told us that Pantaloon had been eaten
by a Bear behind the scenes. What an opportunity was here lost
of a genuine Pantomimic scene between the Clown (Mr. S. Calhaem) ,
~Fa.nt&\oon-Antigonus (Mr. John Ryder), the Bear (one of the Lauri
family), and the Baby ! More music for Mr. Karl Meyder—" Oh,
what a day we are having!" and several political hits about the
Bear. But Mr. Chatterton rightly felt that he must go no further
in anticipating Christmas than was warranted by the Inspired
Dramatist's " Dance of Twelve Ptustics habited as Satyrs."

This, again, looks uncommonly like the pump and tubs of Mr.
Crtjmmles in Shaespeare's time. "I say," said Mr. Crummles-
Burbage to Mr. Shakspeare, "I bought all the dresses and
properties for that last Masque, and we've only used 'em once;
couldn't you bring'em in again somehow?" And Mr. William,
the easiest-going Author in the world, as long as his pet lines were
well delivered, looked over the manuscript, saw exactly the place
for the dance, wrote in a few introductory speeches, and the thing
was done—and done well.

Antigonus hasn't much to say, as no doubt the Mr. John Byder
of Shakspeare's time pointed out rather forcibly to the dramatist,
who, admitting the justice of the objection, waited till he saw an
opportunity in Act II. Sc. 3, where Antigonus is, for the most part,
standing mumchance before his scolding wife, and then made Leontes
turn on him with—

" And, lozel, thou art worthy to be hanged
That wilt not stay her tongue."

And gave Antigonus the telling retort—

" Hang all the husbands
That cannot do that feat, you '11 leave yourself
Hardly one subject."

Which, of course, coming from the_Mr. John Ryder of Shaespeare's
time, brought down the house, as it does every night at Drury Lane.
The Divine Williams knew how to sweeten the draught, and induce
his best men to play small parts.

The performance throughout at Drury Lane is generally good.
Mrs. Hermann Vezin's Paulina is admirable, and thoroughly
deserved the generally hearty applause that recalled her before the
curtain after the Third Scene of the Second Act. She is never once
indistinct—a fault common now-a-days to most Actors, whether in
large or small theatres. If my friends in front will take my advice,
and closely watch the manner, bearing, and remarkable "get up"
of two distinguished, but untitled, Noblemen, mentioned mysteriously
in the playbill as " Two other Sicilian Lords," they will not have

visited the " Lane" in vain. A classic slave, with the whiskers of
Jeames of Berkeley Square, will also be an interesting study for the
antiquarian. A better choice for Hermione than Miss Wallis
could not be made for Drury Lane. Mr. Beverly's scenery is, of
course, a strong feature in the revival.

Mr. Phelps is announced for November, to appear as Cardinal
Wolsey; and there are to be morning performances of Operas in
English, under the direction of Mr. Karl Meyder, and the Panto-
mime, with the Vokeses in it, is to be Cinderella, written by an
entirely new hand—one Mr. E. L. Blanchard—of whom report
says great things, and who, I am informed, has not written more
than a hundred capital Christmas Annuals for the delight of old and
young children at this very theatre. Prosit. Here's to you, Mr.
E. L. B., and of course He '11 be as successful as ever, which is the
sentimenx of Your Representative.

P.S.—At the foot of the bill I read, as a sort of extra character
omitted in the cast of The Winter's Tale, or as a star by himself,
Refreshment Contractor . . . Mr. T. Gr. Clarke.

But why contract refreshments ? Why not expand them, and
develope the resources of the establishment ? A propos of Clarkes—
when may Clergymen go to a theatre ? Answer.—When none of the
audience pay, and ivholly orders are admitted. This was the prize
Catechism riddle at the Church Congress. It was asked by Bishop
Stortford (of the Eastern Counties Diocese), who was much annoyed
at not having been invited to the Pan-Anglican Synod.

COMFORT FOR fCATTLE.

The want ad-
vertised as
below in the
Glasgow Neivs
appears, on the
face of it, to in-
dicate peculiar
and remarkable
tenderness to-
wards dumb ani-
mals, or, at any
rate, extreme
kindness to
cattle :—

COOK.— Re-
spectable mid-
dle-aged Country
Woman WANTED
—able to wash,
dress, and milk a
Cow. Good wage.—
Address, &c.

Inquiry for a
Cook and Milk-
maid, whose office
it will be not only
to milk, but also
to wash and dress a Cow, apparently bespeaks a more than
Brahminical consideration for cows. Of old, " dawtit, twal-pmt
Hawkie" was a phrase in Scotland denoting affection for a cow;
but that feeling has hitherto never been imagined to amount to the
fondness implied in tending that creature as though it were a
baby. Was the original good man who kissed his cow, and said,
"Everyone to his liking! " a canny Scot?

PARADOXICAL PLANETS.

The Sun gives Venus very much less light

Than Mercury, yet she shines as much more bright.

Why does the darker Planet look the lighter ;

The less illumined shine by far the brighter ?

The reason is, Astronomers declare,

Her atmosphere is dense, and his is rare.

He hath no clouds, and probably no water.

Both has the bright Orb named from Ocean's Daughter.

Vapour, indeed, the face of Venus shrouds;

But there's a silver lining to her clouds,

The side of them that's turned towards the Sun,

Of course as silver shines, so shines that one.

To Womankind it is an old objection

That they are Man's inferiors in reflection.

But Venus a superior power displays

To Mercury's, of reflecting solar rays.

There 's reason—din it into Men's dull ears

In proof of Woman's wit, Strong-Minded Dears.