Punch / Almanack: Punch / Almanack (1845)

2 tt 'Sunfiap.

- CT Messrs. Sturgb decline Tan hale or malting barley, bein

3 M I friends to the weak and the sick but not to the stout and hale. (Ale.
. Vp Extraordinary Fog. To-day a tremendous fog visited Fleet St. It
4: lU was, however, confined to the city, being too thick to get through
i.'itt Teni[)te Bar.

0 V\ The Queen and Prince Albert subscribe to public wash-
n rp > houses. A nice bit of " Windsor soap " lor the people.

^'i,H-St. iLconarfl.

1 £ jPoSTING-eills illegally fixed on tue wellington statue. i22 j S

8q I Shame to stick an old soldier who never stuck at anything! L,, _

o ,a coloured sketch of the opening of the exchange exhibited V J, o

fl £l'\ AT Ma. Moon's. Coloured I very strange, tnis priutseller's designs, cia'-Tt
Yunnan [being generally so very pla'nJjZQ.M.

Tu

SunDan.

1 u-tVX Yesterday Lord Mayor's Day. Gibbs drawn to Guildhall by
1 l "fl. six horses. Six horses ! Much better had he posted the pony. icyn

\i' St. faartin. ^.Q

12, WA laj)t complains in the papers op the ruffianly conduct of !27

, ^' I certain medical 8tudents at THkLonDON university. Such!]

Jo 1h £t BrtttUS t8t"uents " when taken to be well shaken."j|28

14 F i^,GNS or a severe winter. A Correspondent slates that yesterday'iOQ
he positively saw hall a ton of coals and six bundles of wood delivered'i ,
l^.S 'gt. fOactlUtUS. [at thd British and Foreign Institute-i^O, lSunDas> [cally demanded change.

Jpuniiap.

SmITU's DI8 f Il.le tl v POUND TO havk illicit pitb« dm d br-gk Off P. d.

The excise officer? " call spirits from the vasty deep," and they come.
A cakuo of American candles imported. When will Pennsylvania
send her compoHtt.ion—and how much to the pound ?

©Bmunu i£t.

Alarming panic in tub Citt. Lord Mayor Gibbs has announced hia
intention at the next vacancy to put up lor the Governorship of the
St. (ttCCllta. [Bank of inland.

SunDap.

Sir James Graham recommends the abolition of the evening
sitttingsat tue Old Bailey, that criminals may not he sent across
. . [tlie sea while their judges are " half-seas oner."

St. tttattjertne.

„. Chinese granite offered for sale at Liverpool. The masons
VV of Englaud invited to a tough " Chinese chop."

t-i Instinct of Rats. Sir Robert Peel sets a trap for Brougham, who
lH smells the salary, and declares it is not quite " the cheese."

Seventy pages of the "Gazette" filled by railway notice*.
Ah 1 seventy pages to carry the railway trains.
C3 Cool Impudence. Yesterday an individual of dashing exterior pre-
sented a shilling to the toll-keeper of Waterloo Bridge, and aarcasti-

Bubbles of the Year.—The Great Unaccountable.—" I likes to be despised." Maw-worm, in The Hypocrite.

HORTICULTURAL NOTICE.

The flower of the garden, the lettuce, opens at seven and shuts at ten.
To prevent the intrusion of slugs, it might be as well to attach a piece
of paper to the lettuce, inscribed with the words, " No admittance
except on business."

HINTS FOR EVENING PARTIES.

Now convert old gossamer into opera hat, by doubling it up, and
lay in small talk for approaching evening parties. Now practise the
Polka with arm-chair, and rub up old imitations d la Joel of neighing
horses, and sawing wood. Now read up familiar Joes, and learn new
jokes for quadrilles. Now study in the looking-glass for comic song,
and flour your Postilion's wig for masked ball. Now compose speech
to toast "The Ladies,'.' and commit to memory a " Return thanks"
w-hen your " health " is proposed at supper.

HOW TO MAKE A GUY.

Get a head of long hair turned up at the ends, and put it on a Chapeau

Franc-ais; take a pair of ir.ustachios, an imperial and eye glass ; add
to these a blue satin scarf, witli a gold pin like a beadle's"staff, braided
coat, crimson waistcoat, ladies' boots, canary kids, a tremendous
swagger, and a very small riding-whip Put these together on ablock;
turn it into Kegent Street about three o'clock; and you will have
succeeded in making a perfect Guy.

IMPORTANT TO BOKROWKRS.

The present quotations in the money market for a jff50 bill, are aflO
in money and the rest in good cholera Cape. The advantages of this
system are, you can have your bill discounted by the father, be sued
by the, son, arrested by the uncle, sold up by the nephew, and locked
up in the sponging-house by the first cousin.

MKDfCAL.

Certain Cure of a Cold in a Prima Donna.—Stop her salary, or put
a rising vocalist in her part.