DOI Heft:
Punch's Almanack for 1881
DOI Seite / Zitierlink:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.17773#0012
December 13, 1880.]
PUNCH’S ALMANACK FOR 1881,
CHEERY MEMS.
By a Communist.
ROYALTIES.
Monday.—Charles the
First of England was exe-
cuted.
Tuesday. — Louis the
Sixteenth of France was
executed.
Wednesday. — The Em-
peror Paul of Russia was
murdered.
Thursday.—Edward the
Second of England was
murdered,
Friday. — Henry the
Third of France was mur-
dered.
Saturday. — Henry the
Fourth of France was mur-
dered.__
COLWELL HATCHNEY
RIDDLES FOR THE
Y’EAR.
Why do the suppressio
veri and the mggestio falsi
of a money-lending gentle-
man of the Hebrew per-
suasion resemble the
Seventh Month ?
Because they ’re a Jew lie!
{July !)
WHYdoesthe loud breath-
ing of a half-starved cur
munching a bare bone re-
semble the Eighth Month ?
Because it’s a gnaw gust
(August!)
STRUTT’S SPORTS AND PASTIMES.’
CHEERY MEMS.
By a Wagnostic.
CLERGYMEN.
Monday.—The Rev. Dr.
Dodd was hung.
Tuesday.—The Rev. Lau-
rence Sterne died in a
garret.
Wednesday. — The Rev.
Nicholas Ridley was
burnt at Oxford.
Thursday.—Huss burnt
— but not ’Us, thank Good-
ness.
Friday.—The Rev. Thos.
Cranmer was burnt at
Oxford.
Saturday. — A Meeting
was held of the Disestab-
lishment of the Church
Society.
ASTRONOMY FOR
BEGINNERS.
High-diddle-diddle, the
Sun in the middle
Of the Planets, the Earth,
and the Moon ;
The little Boy laughed to
hear such truth,
As ’twas told by a great
Buffoon.
A Truth foe Thinkers.
—Homoeopathy won’t cure
herrings.
A Pessimist Proverb.
—“ ’Tis a good wind that
blows nobody ill. ”
THE LATEST-THE SIXTEEN (OR FIFTEEN ?) STONE PUZZLE.
HOW WILL HE MANAGE IT?
Mems, on Mountaineering. — There is no
rapid act of climbing to compare with running
up a bill. But mind, and beware of a precipice
when you get to the top. Climbers, accept this
caution from the Land of Ben Lomond.
Winter Leaves.—“ Now the New Year has
come,” people say, “ I shall turn over a new leaf.’ ’
Not at all a seasonable resolution. There are no
leaves whatever at this time of year on any of the
trees except evergreens.
An Appeal from the Police.—A Clown at
a refreshment-bar calls for a glass of sherry, and
pays for it; drinks the sherry, pockets the glass,
and argues that he bought the glass, as well as
the sherry. What does the Bench say ?
Vol. 80.
b
PUNCH’S ALMANACK FOR 1881,
CHEERY MEMS.
By a Communist.
ROYALTIES.
Monday.—Charles the
First of England was exe-
cuted.
Tuesday. — Louis the
Sixteenth of France was
executed.
Wednesday. — The Em-
peror Paul of Russia was
murdered.
Thursday.—Edward the
Second of England was
murdered,
Friday. — Henry the
Third of France was mur-
dered.
Saturday. — Henry the
Fourth of France was mur-
dered.__
COLWELL HATCHNEY
RIDDLES FOR THE
Y’EAR.
Why do the suppressio
veri and the mggestio falsi
of a money-lending gentle-
man of the Hebrew per-
suasion resemble the
Seventh Month ?
Because they ’re a Jew lie!
{July !)
WHYdoesthe loud breath-
ing of a half-starved cur
munching a bare bone re-
semble the Eighth Month ?
Because it’s a gnaw gust
(August!)
STRUTT’S SPORTS AND PASTIMES.’
CHEERY MEMS.
By a Wagnostic.
CLERGYMEN.
Monday.—The Rev. Dr.
Dodd was hung.
Tuesday.—The Rev. Lau-
rence Sterne died in a
garret.
Wednesday. — The Rev.
Nicholas Ridley was
burnt at Oxford.
Thursday.—Huss burnt
— but not ’Us, thank Good-
ness.
Friday.—The Rev. Thos.
Cranmer was burnt at
Oxford.
Saturday. — A Meeting
was held of the Disestab-
lishment of the Church
Society.
ASTRONOMY FOR
BEGINNERS.
High-diddle-diddle, the
Sun in the middle
Of the Planets, the Earth,
and the Moon ;
The little Boy laughed to
hear such truth,
As ’twas told by a great
Buffoon.
A Truth foe Thinkers.
—Homoeopathy won’t cure
herrings.
A Pessimist Proverb.
—“ ’Tis a good wind that
blows nobody ill. ”
THE LATEST-THE SIXTEEN (OR FIFTEEN ?) STONE PUZZLE.
HOW WILL HE MANAGE IT?
Mems, on Mountaineering. — There is no
rapid act of climbing to compare with running
up a bill. But mind, and beware of a precipice
when you get to the top. Climbers, accept this
caution from the Land of Ben Lomond.
Winter Leaves.—“ Now the New Year has
come,” people say, “ I shall turn over a new leaf.’ ’
Not at all a seasonable resolution. There are no
leaves whatever at this time of year on any of the
trees except evergreens.
An Appeal from the Police.—A Clown at
a refreshment-bar calls for a glass of sherry, and
pays for it; drinks the sherry, pockets the glass,
and argues that he bought the glass, as well as
the sherry. What does the Bench say ?
Vol. 80.
b