DOI issue:
January to June, 1845
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16521#0111
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
115
' "Faugh !" exclaimed King Dan, with a strong expression of disgus'..
PUNCH'S FAiRY TALES. C£Tn ray opinion," interrupted Faithful Tom (who was as mad as a
(with obtrusively obvio0s morals, ; March hare), "Mother Broomstick is no conjuror at alL" With that.
Faithful Tom threw a somersault, and stood on his head.
For the New Generation.
Once upon a time there was an old king, whose name was King Dan.
This king had been very rich and powerful; but, as he grew old, his
revenue dwindled and dwindled away, and his hereditary bondsmen de-
serted him one after another, till at last he was left alone in his palace, by
the sea-shore, with his three sons and one old servant. This old servant
had been the court fool, and was called faithful Tom, or sometimes Tom
Steel : not from his being sharp, for that lie certainly was not, but because
he was true to King Dan, as the needle to the pole—or as the Pole himself
to the neighbourhood of Leicester Square. To add to the poor old King's
misery, (for he had been a very merry old king, and had loved good cheer,
when other people's money paid for it,) he was prevailed upon by his father
confessor to register a vow somewhere that he would never drink anything
stronger than water again, except medicinally. So King Dan used to
saunter dismallv bv the sea-side, under his palace of Derrydown, thinking *i,tT,Tr
of his poverty and weak potations, and often singing the following mourn- " My children, said King Dan" it seems that none of yo.cantbfok
ful ditty, which, as your Mama will be able to tell you, if she is at all of a benevolent power to apply to for aid in our sad pick e. No a-this
addicted to jovial company, is a variation of a very pretty song, which moment can I myself—unless perhaps the Whig Fairy, who delivered hk
records the adventures of an ancient monarch, called Cole [™m if *e other day-but no, she will not help us tins bout-andI
have therefore determined, like so many old Kings before me, to sena
" Old King Dan was a wretched old man, you, my eldest Boy, to travel over the wide world, and seek for adven-
And a wretched old man was be ;- tures; in order that you may meet with some kind Fairy, and receive
He called for his pipe, and he called forms can. , instrncrinns and assistance "
But they brought him temperance tea1" ner instructions ana assistance r
So Prince John embraced his Father, and received his blessing (in
One day, however, when King Dan was groaning and singing, a3 usual, the form which was always used in that kingdom, "More power to your
what was his surprise at seeing a large fish pop his head out of the sea, elbow ! "), and set out on his journey over the wide world. He had not
and hearing him answer thus : —
gone far, before he came to a wood ; and there, on a bough, sat the most
beautiful Pigeon he had ever seen, with a crest on his head like a mitre.
" Old King Dan is a silly old man,
And a stupid old man is he:—
If he takes to his bed, and complains of his a»ad. « t» • t» • • j .1 n- « t 1 1 ,
He can drink, if he please, like me > " Prince, Prince, said the Pigeon, « I know what you want!
" Do you, though?" said the Prince. "Pray, who are you 1'
" Egad ! " said King Dan, " I never thought of that ; I may < Jie the " I *m called the Sweet Dove of Elphin," replied the Pigeon ; " and I
thing medicinally, to be sure! I '11 follow your advice, my friend." Ho King fenow that you are in search of the charm Repeal-of-the-Union, and, more
Dan went home that day rather more joyfully, and when he arrived he jspecially, of a means to restore Old King Dan's revenue."
fell ill immediately, and had tumbler after tumbler of warm brandy-and- "Wonderful dove!" said the Prince, "the la^t is indeed my prin-
water brought to him in bed, till he became exceedingly drunk and happy. 1 cipal object. Can you tell me how to forward it !"
This, however, was only for one day, and the next morning he awoke sick "lean," said the Pigeon: "King Dan may repeal the Union, and
and sorry, and fell to thinking over his poverty as usual. But it now recover his rents and all his ancient glories, if you can do three little
occurred to him, that as a fish had taught him how to drink, some other things first."
supernaturally-gifted animal might teach him how to make money ; or— j "What are they?" eagerly demanded the Prince,
which came to the same thing—to find the talisman called Repeal-of-the- " They are these," replied the Pigeon :—
Union, which he had long pretended to be in search of. So, after con-'
sidering a long while, he called his three Sons and Faithful Tom to1 CT0SS tfte Brn,Bc m tofK af6er 6e butIt:
him, and addressed them in the Conciliation Hall of his Palace, in these m t,r'nfe ftom ti>c ^OtttitatttS «iat toil! tiefirr SotD
words :— a!,°
"Hereditary bondsman !" (this was addressed to the only one left, & ti)t fflibt that bill atbtx lie pais "
True Tom) "and my three dear children ! I have called you together « And the Bridge ?" asked the Prince ; "where is it? what is it called?"
to see if any of you can suggest a new remedy in this sad state of affairs. "Hungerford," said the Pigeon.
Heaven knows I have left no stone unturned—I have applied every " And the Fountains?" asked the Prince,
conceivable screw—nor can I be accused of being on any one occasion « Trafalgar," said the Pigeon,
scrupulous as to the means I used; yet all human aid seems to have " And the Debt ?"
deserted us : and it is beyond mortal power to resuscitate my rents. It « American stock, of course," said the Pigeon, rather sharply ; for he
remains, however, to be seen whether the fairies, who, before now, have 1 took an interest in the young Prince, and was vexed to find him so
assisted good and patriotic men ;" (here Old King Dan placed his hand 1 ignorant as not to know that American Knavery (as vour Mama will tell
on his heart)—" whether those beneficent beings will help us, will find us 1 vou) is equally proverbial with American Slavery.
a way out of our misery and into our property—will teach us to repeal n you are a good boy, and study your Punch, perhaps you shall hear
the Union, and avoid the Workhouse. I have done, my children. 1 some day what befel the Prince in his search after the Three Impossibili-
' Hereditary Bondsman, know you not,' "— j tieg> which were to conduct him to the Utter Impossibility ; how the
" That will do, Father," interrupted Priuce John ; " all friends here. Orange-tailed Mare showed him her beautiful nest ; and how he obtained
What think you of the Hill of Howth ?" I the c of Repeal, and many other wonderful adventures that he met
" Pshaw !" said King Dan, " I have appealed to it fifty times, and with
always with the same no-result. ' Hereditary bondsman, know,'"— —
"Well, then," broke in Prince Maurice, "there is Dame Porter."
" Pshaw !" said King Dan, " what, the Federalist Fairy ? no—green as Peel's Periodical.
everything ^about me may be, I am not so green as that. ' Hereditary \ When the Act for prolonging the Income Tax is printed, we hope in
^jf0?^' , T, . fairness it will have at the end the same notice as is attached to serial
Well, suggested Prince Morgan ," there is Mother Broomstick, the articles in magazines viz-—
mischievous old witch in the plaid inexpressibles." ; ' ' (x<, be Continued.)
115
' "Faugh !" exclaimed King Dan, with a strong expression of disgus'..
PUNCH'S FAiRY TALES. C£Tn ray opinion," interrupted Faithful Tom (who was as mad as a
(with obtrusively obvio0s morals, ; March hare), "Mother Broomstick is no conjuror at alL" With that.
Faithful Tom threw a somersault, and stood on his head.
For the New Generation.
Once upon a time there was an old king, whose name was King Dan.
This king had been very rich and powerful; but, as he grew old, his
revenue dwindled and dwindled away, and his hereditary bondsmen de-
serted him one after another, till at last he was left alone in his palace, by
the sea-shore, with his three sons and one old servant. This old servant
had been the court fool, and was called faithful Tom, or sometimes Tom
Steel : not from his being sharp, for that lie certainly was not, but because
he was true to King Dan, as the needle to the pole—or as the Pole himself
to the neighbourhood of Leicester Square. To add to the poor old King's
misery, (for he had been a very merry old king, and had loved good cheer,
when other people's money paid for it,) he was prevailed upon by his father
confessor to register a vow somewhere that he would never drink anything
stronger than water again, except medicinally. So King Dan used to
saunter dismallv bv the sea-side, under his palace of Derrydown, thinking *i,tT,Tr
of his poverty and weak potations, and often singing the following mourn- " My children, said King Dan" it seems that none of yo.cantbfok
ful ditty, which, as your Mama will be able to tell you, if she is at all of a benevolent power to apply to for aid in our sad pick e. No a-this
addicted to jovial company, is a variation of a very pretty song, which moment can I myself—unless perhaps the Whig Fairy, who delivered hk
records the adventures of an ancient monarch, called Cole [™m if *e other day-but no, she will not help us tins bout-andI
have therefore determined, like so many old Kings before me, to sena
" Old King Dan was a wretched old man, you, my eldest Boy, to travel over the wide world, and seek for adven-
And a wretched old man was be ;- tures; in order that you may meet with some kind Fairy, and receive
He called for his pipe, and he called forms can. , instrncrinns and assistance "
But they brought him temperance tea1" ner instructions ana assistance r
So Prince John embraced his Father, and received his blessing (in
One day, however, when King Dan was groaning and singing, a3 usual, the form which was always used in that kingdom, "More power to your
what was his surprise at seeing a large fish pop his head out of the sea, elbow ! "), and set out on his journey over the wide world. He had not
and hearing him answer thus : —
gone far, before he came to a wood ; and there, on a bough, sat the most
beautiful Pigeon he had ever seen, with a crest on his head like a mitre.
" Old King Dan is a silly old man,
And a stupid old man is he:—
If he takes to his bed, and complains of his a»ad. « t» • t» • • j .1 n- « t 1 1 ,
He can drink, if he please, like me > " Prince, Prince, said the Pigeon, « I know what you want!
" Do you, though?" said the Prince. "Pray, who are you 1'
" Egad ! " said King Dan, " I never thought of that ; I may < Jie the " I *m called the Sweet Dove of Elphin," replied the Pigeon ; " and I
thing medicinally, to be sure! I '11 follow your advice, my friend." Ho King fenow that you are in search of the charm Repeal-of-the-Union, and, more
Dan went home that day rather more joyfully, and when he arrived he jspecially, of a means to restore Old King Dan's revenue."
fell ill immediately, and had tumbler after tumbler of warm brandy-and- "Wonderful dove!" said the Prince, "the la^t is indeed my prin-
water brought to him in bed, till he became exceedingly drunk and happy. 1 cipal object. Can you tell me how to forward it !"
This, however, was only for one day, and the next morning he awoke sick "lean," said the Pigeon: "King Dan may repeal the Union, and
and sorry, and fell to thinking over his poverty as usual. But it now recover his rents and all his ancient glories, if you can do three little
occurred to him, that as a fish had taught him how to drink, some other things first."
supernaturally-gifted animal might teach him how to make money ; or— j "What are they?" eagerly demanded the Prince,
which came to the same thing—to find the talisman called Repeal-of-the- " They are these," replied the Pigeon :—
Union, which he had long pretended to be in search of. So, after con-'
sidering a long while, he called his three Sons and Faithful Tom to1 CT0SS tfte Brn,Bc m tofK af6er 6e butIt:
him, and addressed them in the Conciliation Hall of his Palace, in these m t,r'nfe ftom ti>c ^OtttitatttS «iat toil! tiefirr SotD
words :— a!,°
"Hereditary bondsman !" (this was addressed to the only one left, & ti)t fflibt that bill atbtx lie pais "
True Tom) "and my three dear children ! I have called you together « And the Bridge ?" asked the Prince ; "where is it? what is it called?"
to see if any of you can suggest a new remedy in this sad state of affairs. "Hungerford," said the Pigeon.
Heaven knows I have left no stone unturned—I have applied every " And the Fountains?" asked the Prince,
conceivable screw—nor can I be accused of being on any one occasion « Trafalgar," said the Pigeon,
scrupulous as to the means I used; yet all human aid seems to have " And the Debt ?"
deserted us : and it is beyond mortal power to resuscitate my rents. It « American stock, of course," said the Pigeon, rather sharply ; for he
remains, however, to be seen whether the fairies, who, before now, have 1 took an interest in the young Prince, and was vexed to find him so
assisted good and patriotic men ;" (here Old King Dan placed his hand 1 ignorant as not to know that American Knavery (as vour Mama will tell
on his heart)—" whether those beneficent beings will help us, will find us 1 vou) is equally proverbial with American Slavery.
a way out of our misery and into our property—will teach us to repeal n you are a good boy, and study your Punch, perhaps you shall hear
the Union, and avoid the Workhouse. I have done, my children. 1 some day what befel the Prince in his search after the Three Impossibili-
' Hereditary Bondsman, know you not,' "— j tieg> which were to conduct him to the Utter Impossibility ; how the
" That will do, Father," interrupted Priuce John ; " all friends here. Orange-tailed Mare showed him her beautiful nest ; and how he obtained
What think you of the Hill of Howth ?" I the c of Repeal, and many other wonderful adventures that he met
" Pshaw !" said King Dan, " I have appealed to it fifty times, and with
always with the same no-result. ' Hereditary bondsman, know,'"— —
"Well, then," broke in Prince Maurice, "there is Dame Porter."
" Pshaw !" said King Dan, " what, the Federalist Fairy ? no—green as Peel's Periodical.
everything ^about me may be, I am not so green as that. ' Hereditary \ When the Act for prolonging the Income Tax is printed, we hope in
^jf0?^' , T, . fairness it will have at the end the same notice as is attached to serial
Well, suggested Prince Morgan ," there is Mother Broomstick, the articles in magazines viz-—
mischievous old witch in the plaid inexpressibles." ; ' ' (x<, be Continued.)