DOI Heft:
July to December, 1851
DOI Seite / Zitierlink:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16608#0098
86
PUNCH OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
THE SLANDERED KING BOMB A.
R. Punch, Does the
King of Naples
wish to confound
his slanderers, by
rewarding—at the
shortest notice—a
atmosphere. We are not worthy of him. Can the King of "Naples
offer no retreat? No comfortable box, a little below the cinders, on
Vesuvius ? Or, probably Ferdinand has a royal menagerie; if so,
does not his ape need a groom or chamberlain <' Q.
THE CHINESE IN LONDON.
buorujsu """i* a London is beginning to be regularly overrun with Chinese, either
disinterested aavo-1 genujne or otherwise. If things go on at this rate, every large grocery
cate Here liesiss: j establishment will have its own "Native of the Flowery Land," and
one L/HAKLEsjyiAC- Jqjjjj Bull will begin to fancy himself, on account of the numerous
fab-Lane, a person j emblems of china around hiffl) a regular « Bull in a china shop » The
singularly nuea to phiDese Exhibition afforded the first instance of a native being converted
Sf11N'*l — l°Ur into an article of commerce, when a couple of flowery youths, said to
VI- es- s ??' have been brought to England to finish their education, used to amuse
te^a . tS We-£f S the visitors by jumping over the tables, and performing other feats,
Mappa^t nt i evincing less of mental cultivation than of muscular activity. Eeeling
3 a sort of parental interest in these youths—announced as the sons of a
Chinese noble, who had sent them to receive the last European polish
—we have watched them rather narrowly. We regret to say that we
think we discovered one about three months ago behind the counter of
not unknown to
the worldof letters,
as an industrious
w orkman. He now & tea-dealer's in the New Cut, where he was employed to give a genuine
comes ion\aia to ; appearance to the grocery. Of course it would be difficult to suspect
nf TcLl that the "Fine Old Twankay at Two and Four" being weighed out
by a veritable Chinaman was nothing better than rare old sloe, or that
the "Hyson recommended for Family Use "was nothing but Birch,
which certainly is adapted occasionally for family use—though not as a
beverage.
To come to the point, we do not believe that half the Chinamen we
see about town are more genuine than the Congou and other deleterious
compounds said to have come from China. We think there ought to
of King Ferdi
nand, as his ad
mirer. "The
Devil is worship-
ped for his burning
throne." The ad-
miration of Mr.
Macfarlane is
. ... , , . i l-i-i c ai at i-i ' i be some authority given to detect a counterfeit Chinaman, in the same
doubtless, extorted from him by the natural nobility of the Neapolitan ag ft counterfeit 8ixpence by snipping off his tail, or trying the
King: he loves him for what he is: and it is for the rebuked and ^ Qf goap and wate/upon' his countenance. We cannot suppose
instructed world to pay homage to the idol and the idolator. Mtjmbo
Jumbo and his sacrificing priest are worthy of each other.
that so many mandarins can be spared from their official duties in
China, to speculate in Exhibitions of Junks, or other specimens of their
Mr. Gladstone, in his letter to Lord Aberdeen, speaks of torture national industry. Fancy Lord John Russell going out to China
inflicted for political offences. " The mode of it being the thrusting of with a coal barge, and remaining away three or four years at a stretch
sharp instruments under the finger-nails." j to exhibit it. Imagine his Lordship getting up a ball on board, in one
Mr. Macfarlane, in his letter, thus disposes of the charge:—"The ■ of the Chinese rivers, as our_ Essex Street Mandarin does on board
insinuation that torture has been employed, is too monstrous and too j the Junk ; or fancy his Lordship, or any other nobleman, taking out a
absurd to merit one moment's attention." And, no doubt, Mr. Mac- quantity of upholstery, with his wife and children, and sitting in the
farlane disbelieves it; just as Mr. Macfarlane would refuse credence ! midst of it all, week after week, as an "Exhibition " at Hong Kong, like
to " a sharp instrument" under his own " finger-nails," if thrust there j the " familyof rank " that are honouring us with a long visit—in return
by the order of the King of Naples. The "insinuation"—though a ! for our shillings—at Hydr.Park Corner. It is rarely that any members
sharp one—would not " merit one moment's attention." One would
almost wish that Mr. Macfarlane could give warranty of such
disbelief.
Mr. Gladstone—says Macfarlane—in his tales about gaol doctors
and sick prisoners, talks "a perfect fable." The miseries of Italy are
not the work of benevolent potentates like Ferdinand, but a>e attri-
butable—thus speaks the awful Macfarlane, whose reputation shines
like the Koh-i-noor to all who know him—" to vagabonds like Mazzini."
When a Macfarlane would lick away the blood and mire that incrust
a King of Naples, he must, of course, spit "vagabond" at men like
Mazzini. Some way, he must empty his mouth.
But Mr. Gladstone has a reason—a selfish, worldly reason—for
the slander he has dealt upon King Bomba.
" Me. Gladstone is apprehensive of being unseated by his Alma Mater, and s
looking for a popular constituency, who would be captivated by his strange letters."
This is an admirable touch ; but only what we should look for from
the genus Macfarlane. There is no creature so low, so helpless, who
cannot make dirty motives for other people. Mr. Gladstone speaks
from the fulness of a noble nature, outraged by a contemplation of
human tyranny and human suffering; and—Mr. Gladstone does not
want a remedy for atrocity ; no, he wants a popular constituency.
What other motive could be imagined by a motive-mongering Mac-
farlane ? Yet hear him :—
" Again, other good men tell me that the Right Hon. W. E. Gladstone, M.P.—first
known to me as a Conservative—has suddenly conceived a strong dislike of all
monarchical institutions, and that he is now in the habit of saying, and repeating, ad
nauseam, that all the monarchies of old Europe are worn out and effete ; that monarchy
itself is rococo, and that the sooner we approach to the model normal condition of
the United States of North America, the better it will fare with us all."
Hence, conservatism, in the gentle eyes of Charles Macfarlane
is admiration of the King of Naples and his ghasily doings. To
condemn Ferdinand is to applaud revolution ; to sympathise with the
victims of a crowned monster, is to wish the downfall of the British
monarchy. The crown of Queen Yictoria and the fetters of the
late Prime Minister Poereo, are—at least in the hot and twisted
brain of Mr. Macfarlane—strangely, yet indivisibly, connected.
However, we hope that Macfarlane will have some measure of
reward that wdl snatch him far away from England. Naples is his
of our aristocracy condescend to make shows of themselves, in the way
we are called upon to believe that the mandarins and persons of rank
in China are accustomed to ao when upon their travels. The worst
we can say of any of our lords is, that one of them, occasionally, will
take pills by the hundred, and rub in ointment by the ton, to oblige an
advertising "professor;" but even this, to the credit of our own
peerage, is a solitary instance.
THE TEA AND SHRIMP NUISANCE.
We beg leave to call the attention of the Knightsbridge auchorities
—whoever they may be—to the unpleasant fact, that it is impossible
to pass along the Knightsbridge road after ten o'clock in the morning
without being invited, and almost dragged by the collar, to a meal
of " tea and shrimps." The road near the Exhibition presents all the
horrors of Greenwich at about tea-time, and the struggle round a
perplexed foreigner, whom it is desired t o cram with a regular Gravesend
jorum of all sorts of coarse and cheap eatables and drinkables, is
sometimes most intense. To say nothing of the nuisance of being
pestered to take tea at all hours, we want, to know where is the affinity
between the Exhibition and shrimps. We can understand shrimps at
a watering-place, but there can be nothing particularly fresh in the
shrimps of Knightsbridge, even supposing them to be caught as near at
hand as Chelsea, which is famous for no'hing in the fish line, except
oyster-shells,—which may be sometimes found scattered on parts of
the coast. Jn several occasions we have been nearly carried off into
some way-side house, after leaving the Exhibition, and been thrust down
opposite a large pile of that fishy abomination, which, next to the
periwinkle, we hold in the supreniest contempt.
If we do not make a firm stand against the Shrimp, we shall be
having the Whelk thrust upon our disgusted attention, in connection
with Tea,—a beverage we would fain protect against the unpleasant
contact. At all events, if there is a growing appetite on the part of
the public for the inland Shrimp, let those who have no taste for it
be at least secured from the annoyance of being beset by a swarm of
touters, who line the road between the Crystal Palace and Sloane
Street, dinning into the ear of the passenger the disagreeable cry of
" Tea and Shrimps."
PUNCH OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
THE SLANDERED KING BOMB A.
R. Punch, Does the
King of Naples
wish to confound
his slanderers, by
rewarding—at the
shortest notice—a
atmosphere. We are not worthy of him. Can the King of "Naples
offer no retreat? No comfortable box, a little below the cinders, on
Vesuvius ? Or, probably Ferdinand has a royal menagerie; if so,
does not his ape need a groom or chamberlain <' Q.
THE CHINESE IN LONDON.
buorujsu """i* a London is beginning to be regularly overrun with Chinese, either
disinterested aavo-1 genujne or otherwise. If things go on at this rate, every large grocery
cate Here liesiss: j establishment will have its own "Native of the Flowery Land," and
one L/HAKLEsjyiAC- Jqjjjj Bull will begin to fancy himself, on account of the numerous
fab-Lane, a person j emblems of china around hiffl) a regular « Bull in a china shop » The
singularly nuea to phiDese Exhibition afforded the first instance of a native being converted
Sf11N'*l — l°Ur into an article of commerce, when a couple of flowery youths, said to
VI- es- s ??' have been brought to England to finish their education, used to amuse
te^a . tS We-£f S the visitors by jumping over the tables, and performing other feats,
Mappa^t nt i evincing less of mental cultivation than of muscular activity. Eeeling
3 a sort of parental interest in these youths—announced as the sons of a
Chinese noble, who had sent them to receive the last European polish
—we have watched them rather narrowly. We regret to say that we
think we discovered one about three months ago behind the counter of
not unknown to
the worldof letters,
as an industrious
w orkman. He now & tea-dealer's in the New Cut, where he was employed to give a genuine
comes ion\aia to ; appearance to the grocery. Of course it would be difficult to suspect
nf TcLl that the "Fine Old Twankay at Two and Four" being weighed out
by a veritable Chinaman was nothing better than rare old sloe, or that
the "Hyson recommended for Family Use "was nothing but Birch,
which certainly is adapted occasionally for family use—though not as a
beverage.
To come to the point, we do not believe that half the Chinamen we
see about town are more genuine than the Congou and other deleterious
compounds said to have come from China. We think there ought to
of King Ferdi
nand, as his ad
mirer. "The
Devil is worship-
ped for his burning
throne." The ad-
miration of Mr.
Macfarlane is
. ... , , . i l-i-i c ai at i-i ' i be some authority given to detect a counterfeit Chinaman, in the same
doubtless, extorted from him by the natural nobility of the Neapolitan ag ft counterfeit 8ixpence by snipping off his tail, or trying the
King: he loves him for what he is: and it is for the rebuked and ^ Qf goap and wate/upon' his countenance. We cannot suppose
instructed world to pay homage to the idol and the idolator. Mtjmbo
Jumbo and his sacrificing priest are worthy of each other.
that so many mandarins can be spared from their official duties in
China, to speculate in Exhibitions of Junks, or other specimens of their
Mr. Gladstone, in his letter to Lord Aberdeen, speaks of torture national industry. Fancy Lord John Russell going out to China
inflicted for political offences. " The mode of it being the thrusting of with a coal barge, and remaining away three or four years at a stretch
sharp instruments under the finger-nails." j to exhibit it. Imagine his Lordship getting up a ball on board, in one
Mr. Macfarlane, in his letter, thus disposes of the charge:—"The ■ of the Chinese rivers, as our_ Essex Street Mandarin does on board
insinuation that torture has been employed, is too monstrous and too j the Junk ; or fancy his Lordship, or any other nobleman, taking out a
absurd to merit one moment's attention." And, no doubt, Mr. Mac- quantity of upholstery, with his wife and children, and sitting in the
farlane disbelieves it; just as Mr. Macfarlane would refuse credence ! midst of it all, week after week, as an "Exhibition " at Hong Kong, like
to " a sharp instrument" under his own " finger-nails," if thrust there j the " familyof rank " that are honouring us with a long visit—in return
by the order of the King of Naples. The "insinuation"—though a ! for our shillings—at Hydr.Park Corner. It is rarely that any members
sharp one—would not " merit one moment's attention." One would
almost wish that Mr. Macfarlane could give warranty of such
disbelief.
Mr. Gladstone—says Macfarlane—in his tales about gaol doctors
and sick prisoners, talks "a perfect fable." The miseries of Italy are
not the work of benevolent potentates like Ferdinand, but a>e attri-
butable—thus speaks the awful Macfarlane, whose reputation shines
like the Koh-i-noor to all who know him—" to vagabonds like Mazzini."
When a Macfarlane would lick away the blood and mire that incrust
a King of Naples, he must, of course, spit "vagabond" at men like
Mazzini. Some way, he must empty his mouth.
But Mr. Gladstone has a reason—a selfish, worldly reason—for
the slander he has dealt upon King Bomba.
" Me. Gladstone is apprehensive of being unseated by his Alma Mater, and s
looking for a popular constituency, who would be captivated by his strange letters."
This is an admirable touch ; but only what we should look for from
the genus Macfarlane. There is no creature so low, so helpless, who
cannot make dirty motives for other people. Mr. Gladstone speaks
from the fulness of a noble nature, outraged by a contemplation of
human tyranny and human suffering; and—Mr. Gladstone does not
want a remedy for atrocity ; no, he wants a popular constituency.
What other motive could be imagined by a motive-mongering Mac-
farlane ? Yet hear him :—
" Again, other good men tell me that the Right Hon. W. E. Gladstone, M.P.—first
known to me as a Conservative—has suddenly conceived a strong dislike of all
monarchical institutions, and that he is now in the habit of saying, and repeating, ad
nauseam, that all the monarchies of old Europe are worn out and effete ; that monarchy
itself is rococo, and that the sooner we approach to the model normal condition of
the United States of North America, the better it will fare with us all."
Hence, conservatism, in the gentle eyes of Charles Macfarlane
is admiration of the King of Naples and his ghasily doings. To
condemn Ferdinand is to applaud revolution ; to sympathise with the
victims of a crowned monster, is to wish the downfall of the British
monarchy. The crown of Queen Yictoria and the fetters of the
late Prime Minister Poereo, are—at least in the hot and twisted
brain of Mr. Macfarlane—strangely, yet indivisibly, connected.
However, we hope that Macfarlane will have some measure of
reward that wdl snatch him far away from England. Naples is his
of our aristocracy condescend to make shows of themselves, in the way
we are called upon to believe that the mandarins and persons of rank
in China are accustomed to ao when upon their travels. The worst
we can say of any of our lords is, that one of them, occasionally, will
take pills by the hundred, and rub in ointment by the ton, to oblige an
advertising "professor;" but even this, to the credit of our own
peerage, is a solitary instance.
THE TEA AND SHRIMP NUISANCE.
We beg leave to call the attention of the Knightsbridge auchorities
—whoever they may be—to the unpleasant fact, that it is impossible
to pass along the Knightsbridge road after ten o'clock in the morning
without being invited, and almost dragged by the collar, to a meal
of " tea and shrimps." The road near the Exhibition presents all the
horrors of Greenwich at about tea-time, and the struggle round a
perplexed foreigner, whom it is desired t o cram with a regular Gravesend
jorum of all sorts of coarse and cheap eatables and drinkables, is
sometimes most intense. To say nothing of the nuisance of being
pestered to take tea at all hours, we want, to know where is the affinity
between the Exhibition and shrimps. We can understand shrimps at
a watering-place, but there can be nothing particularly fresh in the
shrimps of Knightsbridge, even supposing them to be caught as near at
hand as Chelsea, which is famous for no'hing in the fish line, except
oyster-shells,—which may be sometimes found scattered on parts of
the coast. Jn several occasions we have been nearly carried off into
some way-side house, after leaving the Exhibition, and been thrust down
opposite a large pile of that fishy abomination, which, next to the
periwinkle, we hold in the supreniest contempt.
If we do not make a firm stand against the Shrimp, we shall be
having the Whelk thrust upon our disgusted attention, in connection
with Tea,—a beverage we would fain protect against the unpleasant
contact. At all events, if there is a growing appetite on the part of
the public for the inland Shrimp, let those who have no taste for it
be at least secured from the annoyance of being beset by a swarm of
touters, who line the road between the Crystal Palace and Sloane
Street, dinning into the ear of the passenger the disagreeable cry of
" Tea and Shrimps."