DOI issue:
July to December, 1854
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16614#0109
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
101
has his passport honoured with the signature of the Emperor, thus
receiving the Imperial permission to travel out of Russia. Nicholas
writes every one of his letters— and like a wise sovereign will insist upon
his signature always proceeding from his own pen.
These matters of state occupy his mind till dinner, which indeed is
very quickly discussed. As the Emperor is a vegetarian—(and a
vegetarian not so much from choice as from principle, as he objects to
taking the life of a single living being)—the table is not occupied by
large joints of meat, nor the time taken up in consuming them. A fried
potato, a stewed pea or two, a boiled cauliflower, a mouthful of roasted
onion, with perhaps a small plate of cherry pie, and a custard to follow
complete his repast; which his Majesty will enjoy better than the
grandest dinner you could give him at the Aster Hotel. He will rise
joyfully from the Imperial mahogany, and, with the smack of an epicure,
exclaim, " I have dined to day—like a Prince!"
His favourite beverage is orangeade; but with his cheese, he will
indulge occasionally by taking a glass of ginger-beer.
In the evening he plays a round game, but never for money. Some-
times he will read out a fairy or nursery tale to the ladies, as they are
assembled round the table, busy with their needles. His great enjoy-
ment is to make tea. Cribbage, too, is another of his amusements,
and, if he wins two or three games, his merriment knows no bounds.
One of his favourite pursuits is to stick pictures and engravings in an
album. At ten his gruel is brought m with lighted candles, and
many seconds do not elapse before he walks up to bed carrying one in
each hand.
The acquirements of the Emperor axa very considerable. _ He can
build a house of cards at least six stories high before they begin to fall,
and he is very clever, also, in inventing riddles. When no one is nigh,
he has been known to try them on the servants, and has often
interrupted a Cabinet Council to ask Nesselrode some laughable
conundrum that has just struck him. His voice is beautifully clear and
soft, and he employs it to great advantage in singing hymns. He is,
however, not above singing a comic song occasionally, and he does it
with such rare humour, that the chamberlains always laugh. His
ability in cutting out likenesses in black paper is the marvel of all those
who have witnessed it.
Such are the tastes and habits of the great man, whohas heen so dis-
gracefully vilified by all Europe, but by England especially ! It will be
America's proud glory (through me) to vindicate the character of this
calumniated Hero ! All Honour to Nicholas !—The New York Hatchet-
Thrower.
THE EMPEROR NICHOLAS.
(As Painted by Dr. Cottman.)
his simple pure-
minded man has
been most shame-
fully libelled. Erom
a long intercourse
with his Imperial
Majesty—from hav-
ing eaten, smoked,
and played at
scratch-cradle with
him for many a year
—I am fortunately
enabled to give some
interesting particu-
lars of his life, which
have never before
been published.
To give a notion
of his extreme sim-
plicity, I will endea-
vour to sketch the
programme of his
occupations for one
day, and really his
habits vary so little,
that the description
of one day may fairly
do duty for all.
The Emperor
rises at six—never
a minute later—
he takes but one
cup of cocoa for
his breakfast, and
he boils it himself
with a "Bachelor's
kettle." If it is raining, he makes up his accounts of the previous day,
but if it is fine, he goes into the garden, and pulls the garden roller
about for an hour. At a quarter past eight he rings the bell for the
servants, never disturbing them before that time. His moustache
generally takes him till nine. His mornings are mostly passed in
his dressing-room. He sees that his razors are in good trim, gives his
diamond boxes a rub or two, or else looks over his shirts and collars,
for the Emperor mends all his own linen. After that he waters his
flowers, of which he is passionately fond, or amuses himself by whistling
" the Russian Hymn " to a piping bullfinch that he has educated him-
self. His private room, in fact, is crowded with objects of natural
history. It is a small menagerie. There is scarcely a square inch of
space that is not occupied by a glass globe, or a cage, or a kennel of
some sort. It is difficult to pick your way across the room without
treading on a rabbit, or a squirrel, or a guinea-pig, or knocking down a
canary cage with your hat. Parrots threaten to bite you on all sides—
little puppies and kittens crawl up your legs at every step. The
Emperor will pass hours among these favourites, playing with them,
feeding them out of his own hand, scratching their "pretty polls," or
teaching them some curious trick. In this way he has brought up a
pet spider that answers to its name—he has taught a French poodle to
strike a lucifer, light a pipe, put it into its mouth, and begin smoking
it—and still more wonderful, he has succeeded in training an oyster,
(an English native) that follows him all over the house.
These amusements occupy the Emperor till luncheon, which is just
as simple as his other meals. A small cup of tapioca with a dash of
sherry in it, or else a small slice of toast and caviare, washed down with
a glass of goat's milk. He then receives his ministers, and if a death- Thg Astronomical March of Intellect.
warrant is brought to him to sign, he is intensely happy. It is imme- ,r , ^. ,, „ • ™-
diately torn up into a thousand pieces! he will listen to no more Mr- Pepper, the able and indefatigable Managing Director of the
business that day—but, without a hat, will rush into the garden and fly \ Polytechnic, is giving a series of interesting lectures on the Precession
kites, or play at coach and horses with his grandchildren. His heart I of the Equinoxes. We understand that the manager of a minor
is so full that it must vent itself in play—and he will jump over a! theatre has written to know at what expense this procession might be
gardener's back as he is bending down—he will throw an officer's cap j introduced into a Grand Eastern Spectacle. The Manager supposing
up in a tree that he may have the scampish delight of climbing up after that the Great Bear and the Little Bear will be introduced in the pro-
it—he will send the ball springing through a large window of beautiful: cession, proposes that these interesting characters should be repre-
plate-glass, simply that he may enjoy the surprise of the servants and I se,nted by living animals. He has also undertaken to get the composer
fine ladies, who instantly rush out to inquire who is the author of the ! °* the establishment to "arrange" some entirely new music to the
guilty fracture. It is most charming to observe the Emperor on such procession, to be played by the Band of Orion—if the members of that
joyful occasions—you would imagine he was some simple country gen- famous orchestra should be open to an engagement,
tleman, and not the Czar of all the Russias.
Then for three hours of uninterrupted application follow despatches,
and letters, proclamations, and ukases. The pay of some favoured regi-
ment is increased—some poor political prisoner, exiled to Siberia quite
MRS. DURDEN ON THE BLOCKADE.
In fat, and grease,
There's some increase;
But yet we haven't ile, and tallur,
And candles, rose
As you'd suppose,
All Rooshan goods, through British valour.
The price of 'ides
Still middlin' bides;
There's no sich scarcity of leather:
Our troops and crews
Ain't made our shoes
Come so outrageous altogether.
And this here war
Of pitch and tar
Makes little difference in the walley :
So vour blockade
Of Roosha's trade
Is all what I call dilly-dally.
Forgive and Forget.—This maxim is admirable when applied to
.. others, and to others alone should it be applied, for it will never do for
unknown to the Emperor, is liberated—some young Russian nobleman you (uuless you're an Officer) to Forgive and Forget yourself.
101
has his passport honoured with the signature of the Emperor, thus
receiving the Imperial permission to travel out of Russia. Nicholas
writes every one of his letters— and like a wise sovereign will insist upon
his signature always proceeding from his own pen.
These matters of state occupy his mind till dinner, which indeed is
very quickly discussed. As the Emperor is a vegetarian—(and a
vegetarian not so much from choice as from principle, as he objects to
taking the life of a single living being)—the table is not occupied by
large joints of meat, nor the time taken up in consuming them. A fried
potato, a stewed pea or two, a boiled cauliflower, a mouthful of roasted
onion, with perhaps a small plate of cherry pie, and a custard to follow
complete his repast; which his Majesty will enjoy better than the
grandest dinner you could give him at the Aster Hotel. He will rise
joyfully from the Imperial mahogany, and, with the smack of an epicure,
exclaim, " I have dined to day—like a Prince!"
His favourite beverage is orangeade; but with his cheese, he will
indulge occasionally by taking a glass of ginger-beer.
In the evening he plays a round game, but never for money. Some-
times he will read out a fairy or nursery tale to the ladies, as they are
assembled round the table, busy with their needles. His great enjoy-
ment is to make tea. Cribbage, too, is another of his amusements,
and, if he wins two or three games, his merriment knows no bounds.
One of his favourite pursuits is to stick pictures and engravings in an
album. At ten his gruel is brought m with lighted candles, and
many seconds do not elapse before he walks up to bed carrying one in
each hand.
The acquirements of the Emperor axa very considerable. _ He can
build a house of cards at least six stories high before they begin to fall,
and he is very clever, also, in inventing riddles. When no one is nigh,
he has been known to try them on the servants, and has often
interrupted a Cabinet Council to ask Nesselrode some laughable
conundrum that has just struck him. His voice is beautifully clear and
soft, and he employs it to great advantage in singing hymns. He is,
however, not above singing a comic song occasionally, and he does it
with such rare humour, that the chamberlains always laugh. His
ability in cutting out likenesses in black paper is the marvel of all those
who have witnessed it.
Such are the tastes and habits of the great man, whohas heen so dis-
gracefully vilified by all Europe, but by England especially ! It will be
America's proud glory (through me) to vindicate the character of this
calumniated Hero ! All Honour to Nicholas !—The New York Hatchet-
Thrower.
THE EMPEROR NICHOLAS.
(As Painted by Dr. Cottman.)
his simple pure-
minded man has
been most shame-
fully libelled. Erom
a long intercourse
with his Imperial
Majesty—from hav-
ing eaten, smoked,
and played at
scratch-cradle with
him for many a year
—I am fortunately
enabled to give some
interesting particu-
lars of his life, which
have never before
been published.
To give a notion
of his extreme sim-
plicity, I will endea-
vour to sketch the
programme of his
occupations for one
day, and really his
habits vary so little,
that the description
of one day may fairly
do duty for all.
The Emperor
rises at six—never
a minute later—
he takes but one
cup of cocoa for
his breakfast, and
he boils it himself
with a "Bachelor's
kettle." If it is raining, he makes up his accounts of the previous day,
but if it is fine, he goes into the garden, and pulls the garden roller
about for an hour. At a quarter past eight he rings the bell for the
servants, never disturbing them before that time. His moustache
generally takes him till nine. His mornings are mostly passed in
his dressing-room. He sees that his razors are in good trim, gives his
diamond boxes a rub or two, or else looks over his shirts and collars,
for the Emperor mends all his own linen. After that he waters his
flowers, of which he is passionately fond, or amuses himself by whistling
" the Russian Hymn " to a piping bullfinch that he has educated him-
self. His private room, in fact, is crowded with objects of natural
history. It is a small menagerie. There is scarcely a square inch of
space that is not occupied by a glass globe, or a cage, or a kennel of
some sort. It is difficult to pick your way across the room without
treading on a rabbit, or a squirrel, or a guinea-pig, or knocking down a
canary cage with your hat. Parrots threaten to bite you on all sides—
little puppies and kittens crawl up your legs at every step. The
Emperor will pass hours among these favourites, playing with them,
feeding them out of his own hand, scratching their "pretty polls," or
teaching them some curious trick. In this way he has brought up a
pet spider that answers to its name—he has taught a French poodle to
strike a lucifer, light a pipe, put it into its mouth, and begin smoking
it—and still more wonderful, he has succeeded in training an oyster,
(an English native) that follows him all over the house.
These amusements occupy the Emperor till luncheon, which is just
as simple as his other meals. A small cup of tapioca with a dash of
sherry in it, or else a small slice of toast and caviare, washed down with
a glass of goat's milk. He then receives his ministers, and if a death- Thg Astronomical March of Intellect.
warrant is brought to him to sign, he is intensely happy. It is imme- ,r , ^. ,, „ • ™-
diately torn up into a thousand pieces! he will listen to no more Mr- Pepper, the able and indefatigable Managing Director of the
business that day—but, without a hat, will rush into the garden and fly \ Polytechnic, is giving a series of interesting lectures on the Precession
kites, or play at coach and horses with his grandchildren. His heart I of the Equinoxes. We understand that the manager of a minor
is so full that it must vent itself in play—and he will jump over a! theatre has written to know at what expense this procession might be
gardener's back as he is bending down—he will throw an officer's cap j introduced into a Grand Eastern Spectacle. The Manager supposing
up in a tree that he may have the scampish delight of climbing up after that the Great Bear and the Little Bear will be introduced in the pro-
it—he will send the ball springing through a large window of beautiful: cession, proposes that these interesting characters should be repre-
plate-glass, simply that he may enjoy the surprise of the servants and I se,nted by living animals. He has also undertaken to get the composer
fine ladies, who instantly rush out to inquire who is the author of the ! °* the establishment to "arrange" some entirely new music to the
guilty fracture. It is most charming to observe the Emperor on such procession, to be played by the Band of Orion—if the members of that
joyful occasions—you would imagine he was some simple country gen- famous orchestra should be open to an engagement,
tleman, and not the Czar of all the Russias.
Then for three hours of uninterrupted application follow despatches,
and letters, proclamations, and ukases. The pay of some favoured regi-
ment is increased—some poor political prisoner, exiled to Siberia quite
MRS. DURDEN ON THE BLOCKADE.
In fat, and grease,
There's some increase;
But yet we haven't ile, and tallur,
And candles, rose
As you'd suppose,
All Rooshan goods, through British valour.
The price of 'ides
Still middlin' bides;
There's no sich scarcity of leather:
Our troops and crews
Ain't made our shoes
Come so outrageous altogether.
And this here war
Of pitch and tar
Makes little difference in the walley :
So vour blockade
Of Roosha's trade
Is all what I call dilly-dally.
Forgive and Forget.—This maxim is admirable when applied to
.. others, and to others alone should it be applied, for it will never do for
unknown to the Emperor, is liberated—some young Russian nobleman you (uuless you're an Officer) to Forgive and Forget yourself.