Punch (103.1892)

_46_PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI._[July 30, 18S2.

THE OTHER SIDE OF THE CANVASS. ImectS.aiTELOT' as we're f01 a ^bonr Candidate this

(A Purely Imaginary Sketch.) Lady N. I really cannot answer for my husband's views on

ci m ti - j.« • t» j. a ir-n n < political matters, Mr.—a— Sqeelchee ; I make it a rule never to

Scene—A Portico in Portman Square. Mr. Benjamen Gitlcheb interfere

{an ardent Radical Artisan, canvassing the district on behalf of m q Jest wtat dd WQman gez> pve learnt her not to
a pal" of his, who u putting up as a Labour Candidate,, argy with me on politics> But> yer se6) a deal depends on the
discovered on the doorstep. wajr a thing is done, and—(insinuatingly)—a, good-lookin' woman

Mr. Gulcher (to himself—after knocking). Some might think it liks yourself—(Lady N. gasps out a faint little" Oh.'" here)—oh, I'm
was on'y waste of time me callin' at a swell 'ouse o' this sort—but, on'y tellin' yer what yer know already—'ud find it easy enough to
them as lives in the 'ighest style is orfen the biggest demmycrats. ; get her better 'alf to vote her way, if she chooses. You take him
Yer never know! Or p'raps this Sir Noeman Naseby ain't made some evenin'—say a Saturday, now—when he's jest 'ad enough to
his mind up yet, and I can tork him over to our way o' thinking. ; feel 'appy, and coax him into giving his vote to Ottelch. You
(The doors are suddenly flung open by two young men in a very plain \ know 'ow to do it! And he 's the right man, mind yer, Quelch
and sombre livery.) Two o' the young 'una, I s'pose. (Aloud.) 'Ow ! is—the right man !

are yer ? Father in, d'yer know? I Lady N. (almost inaudibly). How—how dare you come into my

First Footman (loftily). I don't know anything about your father, house, and offer me this impertinent advice ! How-?

I'm sure. Better go n Mr. G. (good-tem-

down the airey - steps L i j , , , , , peredly). Easy there,

and inquire there. ■ jiiii / I ill jj>| jL Lady—no impertinence

Mr. G. (annoyed with j I '; i ;! I|| j. intended, I'm sure. I

himself.) It's my mis- |fuj / | . | ! ' is M;|j|f shouldn't come in 'ere,

take. I didn't see yer jj H j | j j j fi| |fj /^^^^- intrudin' on the sacred

were on'y flunkeys at ! | i j ij !! WM±~-~- h, privacy of the British

first. It's yer Guv'nor I .-if , ! ' '\^rs^=rW§-^^- Ome, which I'm quite

J want—the ole man! 1 || j I --— ,, KSf ^ML aware an Englishman's

First Footman (with *jB>>m% , < f. i I'l' j ' ■1 ' ^ , ■ 7T^^''^^^te>. 'Ouse is his Castle—

cold dignity). If you ^p|^«£k j ji jjrt^pfe^^^l^MS^^^W and rightly so — if 1

are illewding to Sir JplpfSl '; j • ^^^^^^^^^^^mMmwS'^^^k didn't feel privileged

Noeman, he is not at ^ ' ' \ ' ^^^^^^^^^^TO^^roff^^P^^^^ ^^e* *'m canvassing,

Mr. G. (indignantly). ^Rjk f l'' li! lil'UMP^ ] / / // , wBSmW^MJS^M Lady X. You are

'Ow can yer tell me JPIllit^ I Wh^&Ki^W i I iii WmMmmSUl^KSSt^^i taking a most unpar-

sech a falsehood, when ydMH&X1 '' j'jj'fe^fcJW / h ihlW:.l JBffHMWWSBBKm^ donable liberty, and, if

I can see him myself, •fflHraPlb' ^ k ijj Ji1W J^E^S Uij/U W'Wmti---imffll Biff/if m^^^^^W you ^ave the sfyhtest

a-dodgin' about down mj^s^^fi \^=^^^=^=- "to fe^i^TOmg^"^ aHHUl ifM. i wHBmr sense of decency-•

there in the passage! toBPSEJ A¥w> ' ^^/f!|iM!M|f /I/Aato)VV/i JflHIiNllllHF Mr. G. (imploringly).

(Forces his way past the -J^M'M Z,H&*=~~~-!lm I Slf 1 \MB V'f/ HHlii HiWP Xow look 'ere ~

astonished men into the ^^yi«KA|ffl|W|l — (lAp^ffiJiJJ u\nOV /•// (|HH| §ftf||f Ip^WjP^ let us 'ave a vulgar row

Aa//, addresses a M^^^^^m^^^^^^^^^^^^S^mM^ I IfwIvV if /iSHHMirii\l8i over this ! I ain't goin'

stately Butler i/i plain Jlm'^^^KKlMr!^^^^S^^^^^SS^m^MM• I :^i\vv\\\T\\ I f / ^TMMMnlimTOjr /f/r to lose w<y temper.

cfo«A«.) 'Ere, Sir j'^^^^^^^S^^fP^ ^ ^jBlllI f?.'' ;' jfBBMBBTj ' F Strike — but 'ear me!

!Naseby, I've come in MMB^^S^^^^^^mii ^' ! ''rWuV^i^Wl'TT TI li^ff ^ }1 '1J" WwrBff / if If we don't think alike,

to'ave a little tork with M&^R ^P^^o^^j- ' ml'ifM^' U' I n there's no reason why

you on the quiet like. Wl^^m^^^^^a^^^^^^^^Mw^M'w w it^m^^-ilIvrlr* I IM ill B/ ^ou an<^ me suou^

The Butler (not dis- WmmM Mi M V 0ut* 1 Put tiiat to
pleased). I don't happen ^^^§&|^^^^^fflL\^^^^^^^^wi^W^ yI/#I| It's likely enoiigh
to be Sir Noeman him- l^^^^^Z^^^^^^^^^^^^^ ^^^m^s^^^:^) !;wE1S]r ! W you don't Joe
self, my good man. Sir '^^—T^^^A ^^^^S^^^^L^M^ftl j flmtil'l Q-uelch ?
Xorman is out. ^^wS^^^MSBaa &f m^m^Jm^^^^^^^^^^ww^u^mm^A Lady X. (with tern-
Mr. G. Out, is he? WMmK^ f' W^^m^^^^^^mm^-(mm J • per). I never heard of
that's a pity! I wanted W^^M^^hB^l •-(!%?^c1si>^^ l/fej*! ; the man in my life !

to see him on important ~^>^ W^0M^^^B^^^ "^^^^S^m^^^^^^^^^^^^Wi \ ^^ll/7> {^^^ ^' (triumph-

busines-s. But look'ere '^^^^m^B^^^^^- ^^^^^^^:r^^^^^^S^M\ \ JfflmlI ^l^^- antly). See there, now.

—p'raps his Missus is in w^^^^^^B^^^^^u ^ That's where canvass-

- She '11 do ! (To him- ^s^h s^^^^^^BL^^^^^C ^^^^^^^^^f^^^^^^^^^^^^^^' ^no comes in, d'yer

self.) I gen'ally git -^TlHl^^j^^ffP^^^^*^^^^"" see? It's our honly

along with the wimmin- ^^^iPlBwPjfifc^tf^-^ ^^s^^^^^^^^^-'^-'^^^^""^ way °^ combating the

folk—some'ow ! r#'"^^^^^^f^^i '^^^ K^:"'Jz^'Z ' hignirance and hapathy

The Butler. I can't u ^^tmwm^^^. V"' - '<:"^." of the Upper Classes.

say if her Ladyship is at ^^^^K^^m/ZIW Jm± i«<ra^^->' n . , "Well, I '11 tell yer

home. If you like to <( I know ow to do it! somethink about 'im.

send up your name, I '11 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Quelch worked as a

inquire. ' _ ^-<^ lighterman on a barge fourteen years for eighteen bob a-

Jfr. You tell her week. Ain't that a Man of the People for yer ? And if he

Mr. Benjamin Gulches is 'ere, if she '11 step down a minnit. She
needn't 'urry, yer know, if she's 'aving her dinner or cleanin' her-
self. (To himself, as the Butler departs noiselessly.) Civil-spoken
party that—one o' the lodgers, seemin'ly. Roomy sort o' crib this
'ere. Wonder what they pay a week for it!

Butler (returning). Her Ladyship will see you, if you will step
this way.

[Mr. G. is taken up a staircase, and ushered into the presence of
Lady Naseby, who is sealed at her writing-table.

Lady N. (still writing). One moment, please. My husband is out
just now—but if you will kindly state the nature of your business

with him, I daresay I could- (She looks up.) Good Heavens!

What could have possessed Claekson to show such a person as that
in here! (To herself.)

Mr. G. (in his most ingratiating manner). Well, Mum, in the
absence of his Lordship, I am sure you '11 prove a 'ighly agreerble
substitoot!

Lady N. (freezingly). May I ask you to tell me—in two words—
what it is you wish to see him about.

Mr. G. Certingly you may, Mum! It's like this 'ere. I want
your good Gentleman to promise me his vote and influence for

gits into Parliment, he '11 insist on Labour bein' served fust; he's in
favour of Shortened Hours of Labour, Taxation o' Ground Hents, One
Man one Vote, Triannual Parliments and Payment o' Members,
Compulsory Allotments, Providin' Work by Gov'ment for the
Unemployed, Abolition o' the 'Ouse o' Lords, and a Free Breakfast
Table. Ah, and he means 'aving it too. That's what Joe is. But
look 'ere, why not come and 'ear what he's got to say for yerself ?
He's 'oldin' a small open-air meetin' in Kipper's Court this evenin',
ar-past eight percisely. You come and bring yer 'usban', and I '11
guarantee you git a good place close to the cheer. I '11 interdooce
yer to him arterwards, and he '11 answer any questions yer like to
arsk him—fair and straight!

Lady N. ( feebly). Thank you very much ; but—but we are un-
fortunately dining out this evening, so I'm afraid——

Mr. G. (more in sorrow than in anger). There it is, yer see. Yer
afraid. Afraid o' 'earing the truth. Carn't trust yerself to listen
to both sides. But I don't despair of yer yet. See 'ere; is it 'Ome
Rule that separates us ? 'Cos, if so, it needn't. QtrELCH don't care
no more for 'Ome Rule than that 'ere penwiper do, between you and
me! On'y, yer see, he carn't say so at present, d' yer ketch my
meanm ? (LadyN. rings the bell in despair.) Oh, thankee, Mum,