DOI issue:
July 27, 1889
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.17688#0053
July 27, 1889.] PUNCH, OK THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
47
EVELYN'S HOPE.
The hideous hustle at last is dead.
Come and talk of the beast a minute!
Never again will it flourish, it’s said ;
What on earth we women saw in it,
Or why we liked it, is hard to discover ;
Only the world is a nicer place,
Now that the pest called a “ dress-improver ”
Is'improved, hy Fashion, right off its face.
There’s the tall hat, too, which they say is doomed,
One rather liked it, or viewed it with awe,
Till one sat in a theatre, and far away loomed
A rampart of feathers, frilling, and straw,
Hiding the stage, the footlights, and all,
Save perhaps the top of a paste-board tree ;
Oh, then one’s fingers did certainly crawl
To fling a book at the filigree !
But, some day, in Fashion’s whirligig,
The monstrous hustle, the Eiffel hat,
May arise once more, even twice as big,
For our great-grandchildren to wonder at.
Well, that’s Posterity’s matter, not mine.
The one thing now is to put up a hymn
Of praise, and of hope that, when new suns shine,
Good taste may flourish instead of whim!
Question !—If the result of Mrs. Fawcett’s mistaken
energy should be the transformation of this Theatrical
Children’s Bill into a rash Act, then the consequences
will be to many hard-working persons the deprivation of
a considerable portion of their daily bread, and the crea-
tion of a number of “idle hands,” for whom, as Dr.
Watts, of respected memory, says, “Satan finds mis-
chief still to do.” Before it is too late, Mr. Punch would
ask the lady this question—
Fawcett—an hsec olim meminisse juvabit ?
And if Echo answers “ a bit,” she will be as mistaken as
Mrs. Fawcett herself in this matter.
“ Muzzle the Cats!”—Ask the Shah.
prove, as he is a thoroughgoing Muzzlem.
He’ll ap-
Our Mashers are still improving. They no longer enter the Ball-
room with their Hands in their Pockets. They have adopted a Mode
of Progression more in harmony with their Mental Structure.
ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.
EXTRACTED FROM THE DIARY OF TOBY, M.P.
House of Commons, Monday Night, July 15. — Josiru Gillis
turned up to-night unexpectedly, but with striking
effect. For a long time this great statesman has,
like Grandolph, retired from the Parliamentary
conflict. Time been occupied elsewhere. Has had
to keep Judges in order on Parnell Commission.
On Town Holdings Committee has found it neces-
sary to be in his place to curb impetuosity of
Radicals like Harry Lawson, who want to en-
franchise leaseholds and make other assaults on
property. Joey P>. has had his wild
days; has heard the chimes at midnight,
and even after; hut that was long ago.
Members have come in who know not
the Joseph of the Parliament of 1874,
or of 1880. Joey B. sly, dev’lish sly;
moves with times. Never been the same
man since he became possessor of that
Castle. When he surveys himself in
glass arrayed in black broadcloth, with
gold chain swung across portly presence,
and gold-rimmed eye-glasses, which.
mounted on his nose, add air of placid
benevolence to his visage, does he ever, ■ ;
T wonder, think of the days when he wore ^
the imitation sealskin waistcoat, thrust ^
his thumbs in the arm-hole thereof, and
called Gladstone “ a vain old gentle-
man ? ” These are the days that are no
more. Joseph Glllis Biggar, Esq.,
M.P., of Clifton Park Avenue, Belfast, //
and Blatherabbey Castle, County Cavan, \jfy.r
is a very different man from the terrible ?
free lance of fourteen years ago, who
used to look in on fhe wearied House after an All-night Sitting, and
after passing night on two chairs in Library, announce in shrill tones
that he had “ come back like a giant refreshed.”
To-night Joseph, putting on his gold spectacles and casting a
scornful glance over the Bann Drainage Bill, op-
posed Motion made hy Arthur Balfour that a
money grant on account of the works should he
agreed to.
“I ’ject to this Bill on several grounds, Mr.
Speaker,” said Joseph, with his loftiest judicial
mien. “ I specially ’ject to it on the ground that,
if passed into law, it would be inoperative. Her
Majesty’s Government will, I think, act discreetly
if they withdraw the Bill now, and in-
troduce a more carefully prepared scheme
early next Session.”
It was beautiful! A sight to see, a voice
to hear. An Alderman, or even an Arch-
deacon, could not have put it better.
Other Irish Members in a dilemma; could
not support Government, and yet dare
not oppose Bill that promised to convey
a million and a half sterling of the British
taxpayers] money for the endowment of
an Irish district. Accordingly, they left
the House without voting; but Joey
B., inflexible, incorruptible, sea-green,
would hold no parley with Government,
even for such a bribe. Insisted on divid-
ing House, and presently led into Divi-
sion Lobby Gladstone, John Morley,
Harcourt, and the flower of the Liberal
Party.
Business done.—Joseph Gillis does
battle with the Government on the Bann
Drainage Bill.
Tuesday.—Ignorant or designing per-
Would suit me, I think.”
47
EVELYN'S HOPE.
The hideous hustle at last is dead.
Come and talk of the beast a minute!
Never again will it flourish, it’s said ;
What on earth we women saw in it,
Or why we liked it, is hard to discover ;
Only the world is a nicer place,
Now that the pest called a “ dress-improver ”
Is'improved, hy Fashion, right off its face.
There’s the tall hat, too, which they say is doomed,
One rather liked it, or viewed it with awe,
Till one sat in a theatre, and far away loomed
A rampart of feathers, frilling, and straw,
Hiding the stage, the footlights, and all,
Save perhaps the top of a paste-board tree ;
Oh, then one’s fingers did certainly crawl
To fling a book at the filigree !
But, some day, in Fashion’s whirligig,
The monstrous hustle, the Eiffel hat,
May arise once more, even twice as big,
For our great-grandchildren to wonder at.
Well, that’s Posterity’s matter, not mine.
The one thing now is to put up a hymn
Of praise, and of hope that, when new suns shine,
Good taste may flourish instead of whim!
Question !—If the result of Mrs. Fawcett’s mistaken
energy should be the transformation of this Theatrical
Children’s Bill into a rash Act, then the consequences
will be to many hard-working persons the deprivation of
a considerable portion of their daily bread, and the crea-
tion of a number of “idle hands,” for whom, as Dr.
Watts, of respected memory, says, “Satan finds mis-
chief still to do.” Before it is too late, Mr. Punch would
ask the lady this question—
Fawcett—an hsec olim meminisse juvabit ?
And if Echo answers “ a bit,” she will be as mistaken as
Mrs. Fawcett herself in this matter.
“ Muzzle the Cats!”—Ask the Shah.
prove, as he is a thoroughgoing Muzzlem.
He’ll ap-
Our Mashers are still improving. They no longer enter the Ball-
room with their Hands in their Pockets. They have adopted a Mode
of Progression more in harmony with their Mental Structure.
ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.
EXTRACTED FROM THE DIARY OF TOBY, M.P.
House of Commons, Monday Night, July 15. — Josiru Gillis
turned up to-night unexpectedly, but with striking
effect. For a long time this great statesman has,
like Grandolph, retired from the Parliamentary
conflict. Time been occupied elsewhere. Has had
to keep Judges in order on Parnell Commission.
On Town Holdings Committee has found it neces-
sary to be in his place to curb impetuosity of
Radicals like Harry Lawson, who want to en-
franchise leaseholds and make other assaults on
property. Joey P>. has had his wild
days; has heard the chimes at midnight,
and even after; hut that was long ago.
Members have come in who know not
the Joseph of the Parliament of 1874,
or of 1880. Joey B. sly, dev’lish sly;
moves with times. Never been the same
man since he became possessor of that
Castle. When he surveys himself in
glass arrayed in black broadcloth, with
gold chain swung across portly presence,
and gold-rimmed eye-glasses, which.
mounted on his nose, add air of placid
benevolence to his visage, does he ever, ■ ;
T wonder, think of the days when he wore ^
the imitation sealskin waistcoat, thrust ^
his thumbs in the arm-hole thereof, and
called Gladstone “ a vain old gentle-
man ? ” These are the days that are no
more. Joseph Glllis Biggar, Esq.,
M.P., of Clifton Park Avenue, Belfast, //
and Blatherabbey Castle, County Cavan, \jfy.r
is a very different man from the terrible ?
free lance of fourteen years ago, who
used to look in on fhe wearied House after an All-night Sitting, and
after passing night on two chairs in Library, announce in shrill tones
that he had “ come back like a giant refreshed.”
To-night Joseph, putting on his gold spectacles and casting a
scornful glance over the Bann Drainage Bill, op-
posed Motion made hy Arthur Balfour that a
money grant on account of the works should he
agreed to.
“I ’ject to this Bill on several grounds, Mr.
Speaker,” said Joseph, with his loftiest judicial
mien. “ I specially ’ject to it on the ground that,
if passed into law, it would be inoperative. Her
Majesty’s Government will, I think, act discreetly
if they withdraw the Bill now, and in-
troduce a more carefully prepared scheme
early next Session.”
It was beautiful! A sight to see, a voice
to hear. An Alderman, or even an Arch-
deacon, could not have put it better.
Other Irish Members in a dilemma; could
not support Government, and yet dare
not oppose Bill that promised to convey
a million and a half sterling of the British
taxpayers] money for the endowment of
an Irish district. Accordingly, they left
the House without voting; but Joey
B., inflexible, incorruptible, sea-green,
would hold no parley with Government,
even for such a bribe. Insisted on divid-
ing House, and presently led into Divi-
sion Lobby Gladstone, John Morley,
Harcourt, and the flower of the Liberal
Party.
Business done.—Joseph Gillis does
battle with the Government on the Bann
Drainage Bill.
Tuesday.—Ignorant or designing per-
Would suit me, I think.”