DOI issue:
August 3, 1867
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16880#0057
Actgust 3 1867.]
45
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
PUNCH’S ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.
Valiantly did the Great Peers of England, Pillows of the State,
address themselves to a Reform debate on Monday, July 22nd.
Lord Derby moved the Second Reading of the Bill, and was good
enough to state, with a frankness, which, to say the least of it, was
charming, the reason which had induced him to favour the nation with
Reform. He said that it had happened to him twice to he called in to
fill the painful position of a stop-gap, while the Liberals arranged their
quarrels, and prepared to turn him out again. He had determined that
this should not happen any more, and being in, he had resolved to
produce a Bill which Parliament should pass. This is highly gratifying,
and we compliment Lord Derby on not havina stooped to the pre-
tence that the measure was intended for the good of the country, or
that it was based upon any particular principle. Such allegations do
very well for the Commons, but are beneath the Lords. Mrs.
Squeers justly remarked to Nicholas Nickleby that she wasn’t
going to talk any gammon about the brimstone and treacle given to the
boys before breakfast. That composition was wholesome and spoiled
their appetites, so it was good for them and good for the schoolmaster.
Her candour has been imitated by the Earl of Derby.
Earl Grey proposed an amendment, the effect of which was that
the Commons had utterly wasted the Session, and had prepared a bad
measure, which the Lords would read a Second Time in the hope of
making it more decent. His Lordship bored the House with a tedious
speech, and finally being unwell, abstained from boring further, though
he had evidently intended it.
Various Lords having spoken, the Earl of Carnarvon delivered
an able speech against the democratic and dangerous character of the
measure, which lie regarded as a bloodless revolution.
Earl Beauchamp thought that the last speaker had allowed himself
too much licence. He believed in the Agricultural Artisan. Here is
a new species of elector.
Earl Granville made a smart personal speech, chaffing Lord
Derby. He told a story about the Earl having defended his Bill, in
private, not because it was good, but because it had Dished the Whigs.
He hoped that Lord Derby would allow the Bill to be amended, and
have a new re-distribution.
The Duke of Marlborough defended the action of the Conserva-
tives, on the ground that the Liberals had clearly left them the damnosa
hcereditas of Reform. He declared that the Ministry fully understood
the subject. The debate was adjourned to
Tuesday, when the Earl of Shaftesbury made a long and effective
speech, condemning the having conferred the franchise on what he
called the Residuum, with which he was well acquainted. The
lower orders were affectionate, and sensible of kindness, but they were
ignorant and inflammable, and easily led by demagogues. It would
take ten years to educate them up to the franchise, but in six months
they would destroy any institution that came in their way.
The Duke of Argyll said that Lord Derby would not be a stop-
gap, so he had been a weather-cock. He believed in the people, and
that this Bill would be beneficial.
The Duke of Richmond said that the other Duke blew hot and
cold. He supported the Bill.
The Marquis of Clanricarde said that Mr. Gladstone was the
ablest man ha the country, that we were not in the same position as
after Lord Palmerston’s death, that men were more thoughtful, and
several other remarkable things.
Lord Houghton said that until the working classes were educated
they would probably do some foolish things ; but let education go on,
and he had no fear of the introduction of this large mass of his
countrymen.
Lord Cairns came to the help of the Government, and showed
great debating skill in supporting a measure which we incline to think
he would have demolished with equal ease and more pleasure.
Lord Russell had not made a monopoly of Reform. He stated his
views upon it. You were going to swamp the intelligent artisans. The
redistribution was defective. Lord Derby had thought only of success,
and Mr. Disraeli
“ Had steered through Nilus’ sands to show his wit.”
We ought to diminish the number of members for the small boroughs,
and give more to the counties. Oliver Cromwell gave 300 to the
counties and 144 to the towns. Then you would elect the right sort
of men, country gentlemen with liberal tendencies. It might be mere
old age that made him see danger in household suffrage, but at any
rate we should find protection by adding to county representation,
Lord Derby made a rattling answer, and paid some splendid com-
pliments to Mr. Disraeli.
The Grey amendment collapsed, and the Lords read the Reform
Bill a Second Time without a division.
In the Commons on Monday, we massacred the Innocents, none of
them much pitied, the Scotch Reform Bill was read a Second Time by a
surprise, and in the debate on the Parks Bill, Mr. J. Hardy told Mr.
Peter Taylor that he was elected by the refuse of a constituency, a
remark which the Speaker objected to. The Bill was read by 181 votes
to 64, and Mr. Beales (M.A.) is in a frenzy of wrath, which is a pity at
his time of life and in this hot weather.
Tuesday, Mr. Gregory originated a Tornado debate, and Lord
Stanley thought there was much to be said on both sides. At night
the House was counted.
Wednesday. Mr. Fawcett’s motion for throwing open the fellow-
ships of Trinity College, Dublin, to Dissenters, came to a tie, 108 to
108, so the Speaker gave his casting vote against it. The Church
Rate Abolition Bill was passed—by the Commons.
Thursday. Mr. Punch’s smallest remarks should be carefully
observed. He mentioned last week that the Oxford and Cambridge
Tests Abolition Bill was passed, that is, sent up to the Lords. This
meant that he should have to say, this week, that the Bill was rejected.
Of course it was, by 74 to 46.
Something else that occurred is too funny to be told except from a
report
“ The Marquis of Westmeath said he wished to call their Lordships' attention
to a serious breach of privilege. Mr. Edward Harper informed him that he (Mr.
Harper) was in the .Strangers’ Gallery during the discussion which took place in
the House a few nights ago on the Bill to abolish the declaration against transub-
stantiation, and that he heard one of the reporters say in a loud tone to one of his
colleagues as he entered the reporters’ room, ‘ That damned old idiot Westmeath—
(great laughter)—is speaking. I will take care not to give a word of what he says.”
Mr. Harper also informed him that the following incident took place during the
discussion. While some of the reporters were leaving the reporters’ box and being
replaced by ocher reporters, one of the former said to one of the latter, ‘ What a pity
it is that there is no one to send this drivelling idiot Westmeath to a lunatic
asylum.’ (Great laughter.)
“ The Earl of Malmesbury said if the Noble Marquis thought that any person
had violated the privileges, be could move that that person should be brought to
the bar. But the Noble Marquis was quite out of order in laying before the House
details which were below the dignity of the House. The Noble Marquis was com-
plaining of what appeared to be jokes, the recital of which cnued, only excite
laughter."
Lord Westmeath could not see the fun, but was at last induced to
sit down.
Friday. Just and rational complaint, by the Lords, that Canning’s
statue had been removed. It will, we infer, be replaced. Is
everything to go down before these pestilent Railway Goths ?
A debate on the affairs of two wild countries, Ireland and Abyssinia.
In regard to the first, various Irish Members, with various ability,
stated that the grievances of Erin were unredressed, and they
were told by Mr. Disraeli that his Land Bill, which they had resisted,
was one of the noblest remedies ever offered, and by Lord Claude
Hamilton that they tried to prevent the redress of grievances in order
to have matter for inflammatory speeches. Touching Abyssinia, and
our captives. Lord Stanley said that he was not disposed to leave
those men to their fate, but that the war would be a serious matter,
and if we began it, we must go through with it at any price. He was
making martial investigations. Yes, we must have those poor prisoners,
or the head of King Theodorus.
PIO NONO IN LUCK’S WAY.
The Emperor of the French praises the police for their mainte-
nance of good order in the presence at Paris of numerous sovereigns.
Talk of the sovereigns at Paris ! The Pope, at Rome, has upwards of
1,500,000 crowns. They have been taken to him by his bishops, and
delivered to him down on the nail: Besides all that money, and more,
gold, silver, and precious stones, are tumbling like shelled peas into
the triple hat. The Holy Father is financially master of the situation,
and making a good thing of it. What will he do with all his wealth?
Heap coals of fire on the head of Yictor-Emmanuel by paying off the
Italian national debt? Perhaps he will devote some of the money to
putting down brigandage.
Good Advice.
Mr. Punch knows that there have been divisions in the Reform
League, but surely gratitude should have kept Professor Beesley
from assailing Mr. Beales in the following epigram :—
“ The slave who brought the noble Gracchus’ bead,
To gain more gold, replaced the brain with lead :
Should Beales’s ever in such scales be thrown.
Finder, be wise ! and leave the brains alone.”
An Anecdote Completed.
The National Portrait Exhibition contains a picture of Dr. Freind,
and in the Catalogue we are told that he was “ imprisoned in the
Tower, and released by Sir Robert Walpole at the request of Dr.
Mead, who refused to prescribe for Sir Robert till he had obtained
an order for his friend’s release.” The Editor has omitted to add, that
when Freind heard what Mead had done for him he said, “ A friend
in Mead is a friend indeed.”
45
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
PUNCH’S ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.
Valiantly did the Great Peers of England, Pillows of the State,
address themselves to a Reform debate on Monday, July 22nd.
Lord Derby moved the Second Reading of the Bill, and was good
enough to state, with a frankness, which, to say the least of it, was
charming, the reason which had induced him to favour the nation with
Reform. He said that it had happened to him twice to he called in to
fill the painful position of a stop-gap, while the Liberals arranged their
quarrels, and prepared to turn him out again. He had determined that
this should not happen any more, and being in, he had resolved to
produce a Bill which Parliament should pass. This is highly gratifying,
and we compliment Lord Derby on not havina stooped to the pre-
tence that the measure was intended for the good of the country, or
that it was based upon any particular principle. Such allegations do
very well for the Commons, but are beneath the Lords. Mrs.
Squeers justly remarked to Nicholas Nickleby that she wasn’t
going to talk any gammon about the brimstone and treacle given to the
boys before breakfast. That composition was wholesome and spoiled
their appetites, so it was good for them and good for the schoolmaster.
Her candour has been imitated by the Earl of Derby.
Earl Grey proposed an amendment, the effect of which was that
the Commons had utterly wasted the Session, and had prepared a bad
measure, which the Lords would read a Second Time in the hope of
making it more decent. His Lordship bored the House with a tedious
speech, and finally being unwell, abstained from boring further, though
he had evidently intended it.
Various Lords having spoken, the Earl of Carnarvon delivered
an able speech against the democratic and dangerous character of the
measure, which lie regarded as a bloodless revolution.
Earl Beauchamp thought that the last speaker had allowed himself
too much licence. He believed in the Agricultural Artisan. Here is
a new species of elector.
Earl Granville made a smart personal speech, chaffing Lord
Derby. He told a story about the Earl having defended his Bill, in
private, not because it was good, but because it had Dished the Whigs.
He hoped that Lord Derby would allow the Bill to be amended, and
have a new re-distribution.
The Duke of Marlborough defended the action of the Conserva-
tives, on the ground that the Liberals had clearly left them the damnosa
hcereditas of Reform. He declared that the Ministry fully understood
the subject. The debate was adjourned to
Tuesday, when the Earl of Shaftesbury made a long and effective
speech, condemning the having conferred the franchise on what he
called the Residuum, with which he was well acquainted. The
lower orders were affectionate, and sensible of kindness, but they were
ignorant and inflammable, and easily led by demagogues. It would
take ten years to educate them up to the franchise, but in six months
they would destroy any institution that came in their way.
The Duke of Argyll said that Lord Derby would not be a stop-
gap, so he had been a weather-cock. He believed in the people, and
that this Bill would be beneficial.
The Duke of Richmond said that the other Duke blew hot and
cold. He supported the Bill.
The Marquis of Clanricarde said that Mr. Gladstone was the
ablest man ha the country, that we were not in the same position as
after Lord Palmerston’s death, that men were more thoughtful, and
several other remarkable things.
Lord Houghton said that until the working classes were educated
they would probably do some foolish things ; but let education go on,
and he had no fear of the introduction of this large mass of his
countrymen.
Lord Cairns came to the help of the Government, and showed
great debating skill in supporting a measure which we incline to think
he would have demolished with equal ease and more pleasure.
Lord Russell had not made a monopoly of Reform. He stated his
views upon it. You were going to swamp the intelligent artisans. The
redistribution was defective. Lord Derby had thought only of success,
and Mr. Disraeli
“ Had steered through Nilus’ sands to show his wit.”
We ought to diminish the number of members for the small boroughs,
and give more to the counties. Oliver Cromwell gave 300 to the
counties and 144 to the towns. Then you would elect the right sort
of men, country gentlemen with liberal tendencies. It might be mere
old age that made him see danger in household suffrage, but at any
rate we should find protection by adding to county representation,
Lord Derby made a rattling answer, and paid some splendid com-
pliments to Mr. Disraeli.
The Grey amendment collapsed, and the Lords read the Reform
Bill a Second Time without a division.
In the Commons on Monday, we massacred the Innocents, none of
them much pitied, the Scotch Reform Bill was read a Second Time by a
surprise, and in the debate on the Parks Bill, Mr. J. Hardy told Mr.
Peter Taylor that he was elected by the refuse of a constituency, a
remark which the Speaker objected to. The Bill was read by 181 votes
to 64, and Mr. Beales (M.A.) is in a frenzy of wrath, which is a pity at
his time of life and in this hot weather.
Tuesday, Mr. Gregory originated a Tornado debate, and Lord
Stanley thought there was much to be said on both sides. At night
the House was counted.
Wednesday. Mr. Fawcett’s motion for throwing open the fellow-
ships of Trinity College, Dublin, to Dissenters, came to a tie, 108 to
108, so the Speaker gave his casting vote against it. The Church
Rate Abolition Bill was passed—by the Commons.
Thursday. Mr. Punch’s smallest remarks should be carefully
observed. He mentioned last week that the Oxford and Cambridge
Tests Abolition Bill was passed, that is, sent up to the Lords. This
meant that he should have to say, this week, that the Bill was rejected.
Of course it was, by 74 to 46.
Something else that occurred is too funny to be told except from a
report
“ The Marquis of Westmeath said he wished to call their Lordships' attention
to a serious breach of privilege. Mr. Edward Harper informed him that he (Mr.
Harper) was in the .Strangers’ Gallery during the discussion which took place in
the House a few nights ago on the Bill to abolish the declaration against transub-
stantiation, and that he heard one of the reporters say in a loud tone to one of his
colleagues as he entered the reporters’ room, ‘ That damned old idiot Westmeath—
(great laughter)—is speaking. I will take care not to give a word of what he says.”
Mr. Harper also informed him that the following incident took place during the
discussion. While some of the reporters were leaving the reporters’ box and being
replaced by ocher reporters, one of the former said to one of the latter, ‘ What a pity
it is that there is no one to send this drivelling idiot Westmeath to a lunatic
asylum.’ (Great laughter.)
“ The Earl of Malmesbury said if the Noble Marquis thought that any person
had violated the privileges, be could move that that person should be brought to
the bar. But the Noble Marquis was quite out of order in laying before the House
details which were below the dignity of the House. The Noble Marquis was com-
plaining of what appeared to be jokes, the recital of which cnued, only excite
laughter."
Lord Westmeath could not see the fun, but was at last induced to
sit down.
Friday. Just and rational complaint, by the Lords, that Canning’s
statue had been removed. It will, we infer, be replaced. Is
everything to go down before these pestilent Railway Goths ?
A debate on the affairs of two wild countries, Ireland and Abyssinia.
In regard to the first, various Irish Members, with various ability,
stated that the grievances of Erin were unredressed, and they
were told by Mr. Disraeli that his Land Bill, which they had resisted,
was one of the noblest remedies ever offered, and by Lord Claude
Hamilton that they tried to prevent the redress of grievances in order
to have matter for inflammatory speeches. Touching Abyssinia, and
our captives. Lord Stanley said that he was not disposed to leave
those men to their fate, but that the war would be a serious matter,
and if we began it, we must go through with it at any price. He was
making martial investigations. Yes, we must have those poor prisoners,
or the head of King Theodorus.
PIO NONO IN LUCK’S WAY.
The Emperor of the French praises the police for their mainte-
nance of good order in the presence at Paris of numerous sovereigns.
Talk of the sovereigns at Paris ! The Pope, at Rome, has upwards of
1,500,000 crowns. They have been taken to him by his bishops, and
delivered to him down on the nail: Besides all that money, and more,
gold, silver, and precious stones, are tumbling like shelled peas into
the triple hat. The Holy Father is financially master of the situation,
and making a good thing of it. What will he do with all his wealth?
Heap coals of fire on the head of Yictor-Emmanuel by paying off the
Italian national debt? Perhaps he will devote some of the money to
putting down brigandage.
Good Advice.
Mr. Punch knows that there have been divisions in the Reform
League, but surely gratitude should have kept Professor Beesley
from assailing Mr. Beales in the following epigram :—
“ The slave who brought the noble Gracchus’ bead,
To gain more gold, replaced the brain with lead :
Should Beales’s ever in such scales be thrown.
Finder, be wise ! and leave the brains alone.”
An Anecdote Completed.
The National Portrait Exhibition contains a picture of Dr. Freind,
and in the Catalogue we are told that he was “ imprisoned in the
Tower, and released by Sir Robert Walpole at the request of Dr.
Mead, who refused to prescribe for Sir Robert till he had obtained
an order for his friend’s release.” The Editor has omitted to add, that
when Freind heard what Mead had done for him he said, “ A friend
in Mead is a friend indeed.”