DOI Heft:
September 7, 1867
DOI Seite / Zitierlink:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16880#0114
102 PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [Sbfibmber 7, 1867.
THE FORCE OF EXAMPLE.
Nurse. “ Oh ! Miss Nelly ! Whatever are you about? ”
Miss Nelly. “ I’m only Dumping Dolly, like the Bathing Woman Dips me ! ”
HOLIDAY EXERCISES.
For Young Ladies, at the Sea-side, when they have got
NOTHING ELSE TO DO.
HISTORY.
| 1. What other reasons have you for calling Charles the First the
finest king that ever lived, besides his having been so handsome ?
2. On account of what instances of wisdom, piety, morality, and
self-command in the history of Mary Queen of Scots do you always
write her down as your “Favourite Queen”?
3. Should the proved fact that William Wallace burned a school
with all the children in it, prevent your calling him a darling ?
4- Having seen Mr. Frith’s picture of Claude Duval, do you
think the latter ought to have been hanged ?
5. Sliotdd you have liked to call on King Richard the First, your
“ Favourite King,” after he had lunched on the Saracen’s head ?
6. Show the true mirthfulness of the Merry Monarch, in taking a
pension from France, and letting our ships be burned in the river ?
7. For what other reasons than that he was ugly and religious would
you have hanged that monster Oliver Cromwell ?
8. State the national humiliations and atrocious legislation endured
by us under William the Third, which induce you to regard him as
a hateful hook-nosed wretch ?
THEOLOGY.
1. Ho you think that curates are sufficiently awake to their duties
as croquet players ?
2. For what reason would you have the sermon omitted ?
3. You regard the High Church as aristocratic. Give a second
reason for this view, in addition to the fact that Patristic means
Patrician theology.
4. Distinguish between a moveable feast and a pic-nic.
5. Why would you not be married on a Friday?
6. State whether you are a Ritualist, and if so, whether the persons
who educated you have since been removed to an asylum.
7. Are you aware that when in Scotland you are a Dissenter ?^
8. Do you not think that a bishop’s wife ought to have a title ?
9. If you were a parochial clergyman’s wife, should you think
it wiser to insult your Dissenters, or to treat them with silent con-
tempt ?
10. Show that though there is no objection to complaining loudly
if a preacher gives you an extra ten minutes, it would be vulgar to
express impatience at being detained at the Opera until 1'30.
POETRY.
1. Do you see any good in poetry except as words for music ?
2. Is not Paradise Lost a bore ?
3. Who was Dante, and do you not think that he will live chiefly
through M. Gustave Dore’s engravings ?
4. Is not a great fuss made about Byron, and does not your cousin
Charles, in the Artillery, write every bit as good poetry ?
5. Should not rhythm be pronounced as if spelt rhyme, as the two
words mean the same thing.
6. Is not English poetry far inferior to French ?
7. Do the following words convey any ideas to your mind: Herbert,
Spenser, Cowley, Herrick, Collins, Gray, Coleridge, Words-
worth, Browning ? Have you noticed any sucli words on the backs
of books in your papa’s library ?
From the East.
The Sultan has had his first ride behind his new locomotive, in-
augurating a new line of policy in Conservative Islam. The Turkish
ladies are also about to adopt Parisian fashions, and, in this age of
steam, are going to take to long trains.
FROM OUR PARISIAN YOUNG MAN.
The French newspapers talk about the expense of the New Grand
Opera here. Cost what it will, it will be opened after all, for a mere
song. And it has beaten the New Grand Hospital in the race for the
finish. Sire.
THE FORCE OF EXAMPLE.
Nurse. “ Oh ! Miss Nelly ! Whatever are you about? ”
Miss Nelly. “ I’m only Dumping Dolly, like the Bathing Woman Dips me ! ”
HOLIDAY EXERCISES.
For Young Ladies, at the Sea-side, when they have got
NOTHING ELSE TO DO.
HISTORY.
| 1. What other reasons have you for calling Charles the First the
finest king that ever lived, besides his having been so handsome ?
2. On account of what instances of wisdom, piety, morality, and
self-command in the history of Mary Queen of Scots do you always
write her down as your “Favourite Queen”?
3. Should the proved fact that William Wallace burned a school
with all the children in it, prevent your calling him a darling ?
4- Having seen Mr. Frith’s picture of Claude Duval, do you
think the latter ought to have been hanged ?
5. Sliotdd you have liked to call on King Richard the First, your
“ Favourite King,” after he had lunched on the Saracen’s head ?
6. Show the true mirthfulness of the Merry Monarch, in taking a
pension from France, and letting our ships be burned in the river ?
7. For what other reasons than that he was ugly and religious would
you have hanged that monster Oliver Cromwell ?
8. State the national humiliations and atrocious legislation endured
by us under William the Third, which induce you to regard him as
a hateful hook-nosed wretch ?
THEOLOGY.
1. Ho you think that curates are sufficiently awake to their duties
as croquet players ?
2. For what reason would you have the sermon omitted ?
3. You regard the High Church as aristocratic. Give a second
reason for this view, in addition to the fact that Patristic means
Patrician theology.
4. Distinguish between a moveable feast and a pic-nic.
5. Why would you not be married on a Friday?
6. State whether you are a Ritualist, and if so, whether the persons
who educated you have since been removed to an asylum.
7. Are you aware that when in Scotland you are a Dissenter ?^
8. Do you not think that a bishop’s wife ought to have a title ?
9. If you were a parochial clergyman’s wife, should you think
it wiser to insult your Dissenters, or to treat them with silent con-
tempt ?
10. Show that though there is no objection to complaining loudly
if a preacher gives you an extra ten minutes, it would be vulgar to
express impatience at being detained at the Opera until 1'30.
POETRY.
1. Do you see any good in poetry except as words for music ?
2. Is not Paradise Lost a bore ?
3. Who was Dante, and do you not think that he will live chiefly
through M. Gustave Dore’s engravings ?
4. Is not a great fuss made about Byron, and does not your cousin
Charles, in the Artillery, write every bit as good poetry ?
5. Should not rhythm be pronounced as if spelt rhyme, as the two
words mean the same thing.
6. Is not English poetry far inferior to French ?
7. Do the following words convey any ideas to your mind: Herbert,
Spenser, Cowley, Herrick, Collins, Gray, Coleridge, Words-
worth, Browning ? Have you noticed any sucli words on the backs
of books in your papa’s library ?
From the East.
The Sultan has had his first ride behind his new locomotive, in-
augurating a new line of policy in Conservative Islam. The Turkish
ladies are also about to adopt Parisian fashions, and, in this age of
steam, are going to take to long trains.
FROM OUR PARISIAN YOUNG MAN.
The French newspapers talk about the expense of the New Grand
Opera here. Cost what it will, it will be opened after all, for a mere
song. And it has beaten the New Grand Hospital in the race for the
finish. Sire.