DOI Heft:
December 7, 1867
DOI Seite / Zitierlink:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16880#0239
228
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
[Decembek 7, 1867
EVIDENTLY.
First Youth (aged five years). “Ah ! but s’pose he was to Run Away?”
Second Youth (aged ditto). “Run Away ? Why, bless you, a Child might
Manage him ! ”
POOR PAY IN A POORHOUSE.I
One of the most degrading disclosures in the Parnham Workhouse Inquiry is
that the doctor has been getting only £55 a-year for daily attending on the aver-
age some five-and-fifty patients. To be sure, there is an extra fee allowed him
in some cases, but this can hardly pay him l'or the extra time and labour they
involve. Sometimes as many as eighty patients are submitted to his care ; and,
as his work upon the average takes two hours every day, he receives the splendid
salary of eighteen-pence an hour, which is less pay than a chimney-sweep’s for
cleaning a foul flue. Out of this large sum, however, he has to find the drugs for
the medicine he dispenses; and, unless he chooses to be largely out of pocket, the
black doses he makes up had need be cheap, as well as nasty.
Blackguardians may say that physic good enough for porkers is quite good
enough for paupers ; and, while they keep their poorhouses as filthy as their pig-
styes, no doubt they will consider that invalided paupers should be cured about
as cheaply as invalided pigs. Indeed, we really are surprised that they should go
to the expense of a regular practitioner, even although they pay him such starva-
tion fees as those we quote above. A veterinary surgeon would surely be quite
good enough to look to the infirmities of those who, in most poorhouses, are treated
as mere beasts.
A Lesson to Grumblers.
Why should small people complain of the dearness of provisions when the upper
classes are so patient under similar privations ? Look at the Members of Parliament
who have been summoned on the 19th of November, to be prorogued in the first week
of December. You don’t hear them complain of such decidedly “ Short Commons.”
THE OLD COMIC-SINGER
I met a pale and shabby man :
I thought I knew his face ;
It had no more expression than
A flounder or a plaice.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol,
Ri fol de rol de ray ;
Ri tol de riddle iddle dol,
De ri fol lol de day !
And yet it wore a wooden smile.
As of the days of yore;
And “ surely,” said I, “ surely, I ’ll
Have seen that face before! ”
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
I know, if I aloud had said
What passed within my mind,
The shabby man had answer made,
“No face is seen behind.”
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
For, by the way he cocked his hat.
And wore each careful rag,
And by the sign of this and that,
I saw he was a wag.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
And yet, I say, his face did not
The faintest thought express ;
It was a manner he had got,
But how I cannot guess.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
He turned his elbows out, and let
His hands hang from the wrist;
“ He is,” said I, “ for any bet,
A comic vocalist.”
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
And now I look a»ain, his face
Unto my mind doth bring
A recollection of the place
Where once he used to sing.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
Oh, dreary, dreary were the rhymes.
And wicked were they too.
My son, I’m glad that purer times
Than those have dawned for vou.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
For though new ditties vulgar be.
And poor in wit or sense,
The coarsest of their kind are free
From filth, at all events.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
Oh, dreary, dreary was the room.
And wicked were its ways,
Where gloomy nights brought on the gloom
Of sad regretful days.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
My son, I do with heart rejoice
That, since thy youth began,
Thou never heard’st the hateful voice
Of that pale, shabby man.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
He turned a corner in the Strand ;
He did not stop to drink ;
He bought a baked potatoe ; and
He went straight home, I think.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
Close up, close up, in pity, this
Begrimed and graceless page.
But let not Yorick starve, in his
Dishonourable age.
Ri tol de rol de diddle lol,,
De rol de dol de day;
Ri fol de rol de riddle dol,
Ri tol de rol de ray.
Food for the Imagination.—Fancy Bread.
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
[Decembek 7, 1867
EVIDENTLY.
First Youth (aged five years). “Ah ! but s’pose he was to Run Away?”
Second Youth (aged ditto). “Run Away ? Why, bless you, a Child might
Manage him ! ”
POOR PAY IN A POORHOUSE.I
One of the most degrading disclosures in the Parnham Workhouse Inquiry is
that the doctor has been getting only £55 a-year for daily attending on the aver-
age some five-and-fifty patients. To be sure, there is an extra fee allowed him
in some cases, but this can hardly pay him l'or the extra time and labour they
involve. Sometimes as many as eighty patients are submitted to his care ; and,
as his work upon the average takes two hours every day, he receives the splendid
salary of eighteen-pence an hour, which is less pay than a chimney-sweep’s for
cleaning a foul flue. Out of this large sum, however, he has to find the drugs for
the medicine he dispenses; and, unless he chooses to be largely out of pocket, the
black doses he makes up had need be cheap, as well as nasty.
Blackguardians may say that physic good enough for porkers is quite good
enough for paupers ; and, while they keep their poorhouses as filthy as their pig-
styes, no doubt they will consider that invalided paupers should be cured about
as cheaply as invalided pigs. Indeed, we really are surprised that they should go
to the expense of a regular practitioner, even although they pay him such starva-
tion fees as those we quote above. A veterinary surgeon would surely be quite
good enough to look to the infirmities of those who, in most poorhouses, are treated
as mere beasts.
A Lesson to Grumblers.
Why should small people complain of the dearness of provisions when the upper
classes are so patient under similar privations ? Look at the Members of Parliament
who have been summoned on the 19th of November, to be prorogued in the first week
of December. You don’t hear them complain of such decidedly “ Short Commons.”
THE OLD COMIC-SINGER
I met a pale and shabby man :
I thought I knew his face ;
It had no more expression than
A flounder or a plaice.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol,
Ri fol de rol de ray ;
Ri tol de riddle iddle dol,
De ri fol lol de day !
And yet it wore a wooden smile.
As of the days of yore;
And “ surely,” said I, “ surely, I ’ll
Have seen that face before! ”
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
I know, if I aloud had said
What passed within my mind,
The shabby man had answer made,
“No face is seen behind.”
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
For, by the way he cocked his hat.
And wore each careful rag,
And by the sign of this and that,
I saw he was a wag.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
And yet, I say, his face did not
The faintest thought express ;
It was a manner he had got,
But how I cannot guess.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
He turned his elbows out, and let
His hands hang from the wrist;
“ He is,” said I, “ for any bet,
A comic vocalist.”
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
And now I look a»ain, his face
Unto my mind doth bring
A recollection of the place
Where once he used to sing.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
Oh, dreary, dreary were the rhymes.
And wicked were they too.
My son, I’m glad that purer times
Than those have dawned for vou.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
For though new ditties vulgar be.
And poor in wit or sense,
The coarsest of their kind are free
From filth, at all events.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
Oh, dreary, dreary was the room.
And wicked were its ways,
Where gloomy nights brought on the gloom
Of sad regretful days.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
My son, I do with heart rejoice
That, since thy youth began,
Thou never heard’st the hateful voice
Of that pale, shabby man.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
He turned a corner in the Strand ;
He did not stop to drink ;
He bought a baked potatoe ; and
He went straight home, I think.
Ri tol de rol de riddle lol, &c.
Close up, close up, in pity, this
Begrimed and graceless page.
But let not Yorick starve, in his
Dishonourable age.
Ri tol de rol de diddle lol,,
De rol de dol de day;
Ri fol de rol de riddle dol,
Ri tol de rol de ray.
Food for the Imagination.—Fancy Bread.