DOI issue:
May 1, 1880
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.17763#0206
May i, 1380.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
201
SAVE ME FROM MY FRIENDS! ”
Artist. “Oh, so you think the Background’s beastly, do you?! Per-
haps the Cattle are Beastly too, though i flatter myself-”
Friendly Critic. “Oh no, my Dear Bellow! That’s just what they
ARE NOT!”
THE BREWER’S ARMS.
“ Armorial bearings were originally intended to convey a re-
presentation of great achievements.”—Blome's Heraldry.
It being generally understood that Her Most Gracious
Majesty intends to raise Sir A. Guinness to the Upper
House, Punch submits the following Coat-of-Arms for
the approval of the new Baron.
Quart-erly.
1st, Azure, three X’s or transversely.
2nd, Party-per-Pale (Ale).
1st, Potent, a Bottle of Stout, proper.
2nd, Counter-Potent, a Pick-me-up, proper.
3rd, Gules, a Pot of Stout, frothant, fizzant.
4tb, Sable, Sir A. Guinness, dis-membered, proper.
The Shield is differenced by the Label (duly entered
as a trade-mark) of the eldest son.
Sup-porters.—Dexter, a Yat-man, swearing proper,
Sinister, a Stout Barmaid, talking improper.
Crest.—On a Casque, or, a hog’s-head showing its
teeth, rampant.
Motto.
The Guiness Stamp is but the rank,
The man’s the gowd for a’ that!
Title.—Lord Cooper, Miscount de la Bere.
Work about Worms.
On the painful subject of “ Flukes in Sheep,” Mr. T.
Spencer Cobbold, F.R.S., writing from the “Scientific
Club,” has favoured the Times and the public with an
elaborate communication, in which he styles himself “ a
worker in the rank and file of helminthology.” The
science of helminthology, amongst its numerous and in-
teresting objects, includes the Tapeworm family (Tcenice).
Has Mr. Cobbold, in the course of his helminthological
researches, ever met with, and can he supply us with any
account of the remedies for that terrible Tapeworm by
which our official departments, Civil, Military, and Naval,
are all infested, the Tcenia rubra, or Red tapeworm.
Punch congratulates his readers on the spread of one
quite unobjectionable form of not only harmless but in-
structive Light Literature—Street Lamps street-lettered.
sacrificed to the mind. Those who unduly taxed their intellectual
strength would have to pay for the excess in weakened eyesight,
cramped limbs, shattered nerves, and thinned blood. No, let his
young friends take their pleasures wisely, their present business was
Athletics—Culture might he safely left to the future. Dumb-bells
and hurdles, leaping poles and water-jumps, were of far more impor-
tance to them at their time of life than all the works in the combined
libraries of the two great Hniversities. [Cheers.) Unless they bore
this in mind they would never be able to boast of having attained
the object of the educational teaching of the Academy, and that
object was expressed in the motto under the College Arms in Latin,
possibly in compliment to the contests that had taken place that day
[laughter), he meant “ Salus populi suprema est lex ! ” [Enthusiastic
cheering.)
The assembly then separated, greatly pleased with the day’s pro-
ceedings.
TROUBLE AT THE TOWER.
At an open-air meeting on Tower Hill, held a few days ago “to
protest against the restrictions placed upon the public in regard to
the viewing of the Tower of London and its interesting relics therein
collected,” on the motion of a gentleman named Cox, it was unani-
mously resolved:—
“ That this meeting is of opinion that the free opening of the Tower of
London without useless restrictions and red-tapeism is highly desirable and
absolutely necessary, as the venerable fabric contains a million histories,
,j which can only be properly studied and learnt, and converted to public benefit,
by placing the building and its contents on the same footing as the British
Museum, National Gallery, and other national collections.”
In this opinion the liberal-minded and educated reader will concur,
making allowance for some peculiarities in its expression. No doubt
R L “ highly desirable,” if not perhaps quite “ absolutely necessary,”
that the Tower of London should be freely open “ without useless
restrictions and red-tapeism; ” that is to say, the red-tapeism which
has prescribed the restrictions.
Unquestionably also the Tower contains a great many, if not as
many as “ a million” historical memorials, which may be poetically
called “histories,” and can “only be properly studied and learnt”
by being duly inspected.
The operation of Those existing arrangements for admission to the
Tower, denounced as “useless restrictions and red-tapeism,” was
illustrated by the Chairman of the meeting, Mr. Henry Jupson, who
said that—
“ To see the way in which visitors were treated there under the present
system was to see a very sorry sight indeed, and the only way to thoroughly
understand that system was to go to the Tower and judge for oneself. He
had been there several times, the last occasion being Monday the 12th ult.
It was a most bitterly cold day, and the East wind searched the bones of the
visitors, who were waiting in the open air for fifty minutes to take their turn.”
Why are Her Majesty’s subjects, when they honour Her
Majesty’s Tower with a visit, liable to be put to all that inconve-
nience F And why is it that they are allowed to see so very little of
Her Majesty's Tower? You frequently hear your friends ark,
“Why are we not shown the dungeons?” In the Tower it may
he imagined that there are a good many skeletons in the cupboards,
some of the cupboards containing perhaps more than one skeleton
each, hut in what way can any skeletons, in the Tower be more
objectionable than the mummies in the British Museum ? Is it true
that the dungeons are haunted ; that one prison-chamber still con-
tinues to resound at intervals with the groans of Guy Fawkes ;
and [that the Tower Ghost, talked about from time to time, is an
awful fact ?
That the restrictions on viewing the Tower, which certainly seem
to have been imposed either by red-tapeism or some other official
foolishness, may he promptly abolished, a public-spirited Member
of Parliament will, perhaps, as soon as possible, draw up a Resolution
similar to that agreed upon by the assembly on Tower Hill, and
propose it to the House of Commons.
201
SAVE ME FROM MY FRIENDS! ”
Artist. “Oh, so you think the Background’s beastly, do you?! Per-
haps the Cattle are Beastly too, though i flatter myself-”
Friendly Critic. “Oh no, my Dear Bellow! That’s just what they
ARE NOT!”
THE BREWER’S ARMS.
“ Armorial bearings were originally intended to convey a re-
presentation of great achievements.”—Blome's Heraldry.
It being generally understood that Her Most Gracious
Majesty intends to raise Sir A. Guinness to the Upper
House, Punch submits the following Coat-of-Arms for
the approval of the new Baron.
Quart-erly.
1st, Azure, three X’s or transversely.
2nd, Party-per-Pale (Ale).
1st, Potent, a Bottle of Stout, proper.
2nd, Counter-Potent, a Pick-me-up, proper.
3rd, Gules, a Pot of Stout, frothant, fizzant.
4tb, Sable, Sir A. Guinness, dis-membered, proper.
The Shield is differenced by the Label (duly entered
as a trade-mark) of the eldest son.
Sup-porters.—Dexter, a Yat-man, swearing proper,
Sinister, a Stout Barmaid, talking improper.
Crest.—On a Casque, or, a hog’s-head showing its
teeth, rampant.
Motto.
The Guiness Stamp is but the rank,
The man’s the gowd for a’ that!
Title.—Lord Cooper, Miscount de la Bere.
Work about Worms.
On the painful subject of “ Flukes in Sheep,” Mr. T.
Spencer Cobbold, F.R.S., writing from the “Scientific
Club,” has favoured the Times and the public with an
elaborate communication, in which he styles himself “ a
worker in the rank and file of helminthology.” The
science of helminthology, amongst its numerous and in-
teresting objects, includes the Tapeworm family (Tcenice).
Has Mr. Cobbold, in the course of his helminthological
researches, ever met with, and can he supply us with any
account of the remedies for that terrible Tapeworm by
which our official departments, Civil, Military, and Naval,
are all infested, the Tcenia rubra, or Red tapeworm.
Punch congratulates his readers on the spread of one
quite unobjectionable form of not only harmless but in-
structive Light Literature—Street Lamps street-lettered.
sacrificed to the mind. Those who unduly taxed their intellectual
strength would have to pay for the excess in weakened eyesight,
cramped limbs, shattered nerves, and thinned blood. No, let his
young friends take their pleasures wisely, their present business was
Athletics—Culture might he safely left to the future. Dumb-bells
and hurdles, leaping poles and water-jumps, were of far more impor-
tance to them at their time of life than all the works in the combined
libraries of the two great Hniversities. [Cheers.) Unless they bore
this in mind they would never be able to boast of having attained
the object of the educational teaching of the Academy, and that
object was expressed in the motto under the College Arms in Latin,
possibly in compliment to the contests that had taken place that day
[laughter), he meant “ Salus populi suprema est lex ! ” [Enthusiastic
cheering.)
The assembly then separated, greatly pleased with the day’s pro-
ceedings.
TROUBLE AT THE TOWER.
At an open-air meeting on Tower Hill, held a few days ago “to
protest against the restrictions placed upon the public in regard to
the viewing of the Tower of London and its interesting relics therein
collected,” on the motion of a gentleman named Cox, it was unani-
mously resolved:—
“ That this meeting is of opinion that the free opening of the Tower of
London without useless restrictions and red-tapeism is highly desirable and
absolutely necessary, as the venerable fabric contains a million histories,
,j which can only be properly studied and learnt, and converted to public benefit,
by placing the building and its contents on the same footing as the British
Museum, National Gallery, and other national collections.”
In this opinion the liberal-minded and educated reader will concur,
making allowance for some peculiarities in its expression. No doubt
R L “ highly desirable,” if not perhaps quite “ absolutely necessary,”
that the Tower of London should be freely open “ without useless
restrictions and red-tapeism; ” that is to say, the red-tapeism which
has prescribed the restrictions.
Unquestionably also the Tower contains a great many, if not as
many as “ a million” historical memorials, which may be poetically
called “histories,” and can “only be properly studied and learnt”
by being duly inspected.
The operation of Those existing arrangements for admission to the
Tower, denounced as “useless restrictions and red-tapeism,” was
illustrated by the Chairman of the meeting, Mr. Henry Jupson, who
said that—
“ To see the way in which visitors were treated there under the present
system was to see a very sorry sight indeed, and the only way to thoroughly
understand that system was to go to the Tower and judge for oneself. He
had been there several times, the last occasion being Monday the 12th ult.
It was a most bitterly cold day, and the East wind searched the bones of the
visitors, who were waiting in the open air for fifty minutes to take their turn.”
Why are Her Majesty’s subjects, when they honour Her
Majesty’s Tower with a visit, liable to be put to all that inconve-
nience F And why is it that they are allowed to see so very little of
Her Majesty's Tower? You frequently hear your friends ark,
“Why are we not shown the dungeons?” In the Tower it may
he imagined that there are a good many skeletons in the cupboards,
some of the cupboards containing perhaps more than one skeleton
each, hut in what way can any skeletons, in the Tower be more
objectionable than the mummies in the British Museum ? Is it true
that the dungeons are haunted ; that one prison-chamber still con-
tinues to resound at intervals with the groans of Guy Fawkes ;
and [that the Tower Ghost, talked about from time to time, is an
awful fact ?
That the restrictions on viewing the Tower, which certainly seem
to have been imposed either by red-tapeism or some other official
foolishness, may he promptly abolished, a public-spirited Member
of Parliament will, perhaps, as soon as possible, draw up a Resolution
similar to that agreed upon by the assembly on Tower Hill, and
propose it to the House of Commons.