Punch: Punch (78.1880)

May l, 1880.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

203

OMNIBUS FULL AND FREE.

A Correspondent of the Times, “R. B.”
calls attention to facts suggestive of a way
by which the question between Churchmen
and Dissenters concerning interment might
easily be settled to the satisfaction of both
sides. He says that “ Mr. Morgan does not
seem to be acquainted with the condition of
our Churchyards,” which resembles that
presented by the “ Gravedigger’s Scene in
Hamlet,” insomuch that they having mostly
been full “ for the last 300 years,” and
English people having all that while “been
burying their dead in the ashes of the
dead,” now there “ scarcely ever is a grave
dug in the remotest churchyard without
hones, skulls, &c., being thrown up.”
“Moreover,” adds “R. B.,” “the level of
all churchyards is considerably above the
level of the church-floor.” If all this is
really the case, it speaks for itself, and as
distinctly as possible tells Mr. Osborne
Morgan, and everybody else who cares to
be told, the two things the Legislature
should do for the solution of this grave
difficulty; that is, pass an Act to open the
Churchyards to all manner of Dissenting
bodies, and close them immediately against
all bodies whatsoever; thus both opening
and closing them to everybody without dis-
tinction of sect. So much for the present,
from Yours everlastingly, Yorick

Court News.

Lord Hartington took a constitutional
walk on Thursday evening last from Windsor
Railway Station to the Castle. He politely
declined the use of the perambulator sent
to meet him. His gait and his gingham
were much admired. His carriage was con-
spicuous from its absence. While waiting at
the station for his return train, he carefully
surveyed the new Liberal Platform.

Neat- and Appropriate.

It is stated that at the last social Cabinet
meeting, the Prime Minister read, with
much pathos, the scene from Shelley’s I
Prometheus Unbound, ending with the !
couplet—

“ Till they fail, as I am failing—

Dizzy lost yet unbewailing! ”

Initials on a Rock.

Our comic religious contemporary, the
Pock, advertises itself as opposed to
“ Ritualism, Rationalism, and Romanism.”
These may be called the Pock's Three It’s
ahead. R for Rock is a Fourth; a Fifth is
the Religion it sets up exclusive claims to ;
to which may be added a Sixth, the Risi-
bility it provokes.

ONLY A LETTER.

Ejected—L fiber als).
Ejected—J (ingoes).

The only Conservative Winnings.—
On the “ City and Suburban.”

His Wife has a Complexion of Dazzling Beauty, and he contrives for her a
Head-dress consisting of a Gilt Sconce with Wax-lights and Reflectors to Light
up her Face, and surmounted by a Silver Bell to attract attention.

Next Year he will unveil and illumine her Neck and Shoulders, which are
equally Resplendent—and so on, no doubt, till he reaches the highest Rung of the
Ladder.

hi.

But at last those Liberals, all in a body,

To Council and Caucus came flocking.

“ ’Tis clear,” cried they, “ that a Jingo’s a Noddy.

And as for our Tory Government—shocking!

But the question is. what the deuce shall we do ? ”
At which the Big-Whigs looked wofully blue,

And as good as admitted that none of them knew.
But just as the Tories were all at full snigger,
There suddenly popped up the funniest figure ;

Glad in Galashiels checks, grey, green, and red,
And a brand new gift silk-cap on his head ;

And he himself was sallow and thin,

With keen clear eyes that could scathe or win,
And sparse white hairs and a parchment skin,
Scant tuft on cheek, no beard on chin,

But lips firm-clench’d as an iron gin ;

And no Liberal soul could enough admire
The grim grey man and his quaint attire ;

But the Tories scowled and gave vent to their ire.