“DIPPING THE COLOURS.”

Shady Prospects for the Army, according to the New High-Hart-in-toning-down “arrangement in gray.”

And they may Scream, and they may Call,
Into the Dye he Dips them all :

Their Scarlet Coats so bright to see,
Come out quite Gray, Gray-duallee.”

From “ Agrippa the Dipper,” in '• Struwwel Peter," -

[adapted).

HIS FIRST BUDGET.

Scene—Interior of the Sanctum at 85, Fleet Street. Mr. Punch:
discovered hard at work. Toby [pocketing a bribe) ushers in
Distinguished Statesman, and retires stealthily and hurriedly.

Mr. Punch [looking up). Ah, Childers, you here ? What do
you want ?

Distinguished Statesman (nervously). Oh, please, Sir, I don’t want
to disturb you, but the Grand Old—i should say the Premier—said

I was to read you the rough draft of my financial statement, and-

Mr. P. Ah, to be sure—the Budget! Fire away, then—as you
used to say at the War Office.

D. S. Ah ! I liked Pall Mall so much better than Whitehall! I
do so miss the armour I used to borrow from the Tower.

Mr. P. Well, never mind that. Go on briskly, and tell me if
you have imposed any new imposts. Cut out the preliminary
“ dialect,” as Ducrow used to say, and “ come to the ’osses.”

D. S. [producing MS.). Well, Sir, I thought Bicycles and Tri-
cycles—

Mr. P. Won’t do. They are a bother to the horses of the rich,
but give a deal of pleasure to the small City clerk and the artisan.
Leave them alone.

D. S. [crossing out suggestion). Then a small duty on Cartes de Thsite.

Mr. P. Now that Professional Beauties are out of fashion, won’t
be very productive. Out with it! _ .

D. S. [erasing). Then I thought a small impost upon Theatrical
_.

Mr. P. Certainly not, Sir ! The Public pay enough for their
places already. Away with it!