DOI issue:
July 13, 1889
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.17688#0024
HAPPY THOUGHT.
Nervous Rider. “ Look here, Policeman ! I give this Horse in charge ! ”
\Pzits rein in Policeman's hand, and bolts.
CHEEK!
“ Portugal may have more to gain by an arrangement than by a conflict.”
—“ Times ” on the dJelagoa Bag Difficidty.
When a naughty little hoy, with intention to annoy,
Puts a sleeper or a stone across the rail,
He is mad if he means blocking, while, if more, ’tis simply shocking,
And enough to make a Portugee
Turn pale!
Well, out Delagoa way there’s a boy inclined to play
Such a sly, obstructive, homicidal trick,
As portrayed in Punch's picture. Gentle diplomatic stricture
Seems less applicable here than
Summary Stick!
i For this little Portugee, with an impish kind of glee
That is horrible to see in a kid,
Plans a trick which anyhow Bull ’s unable to allow,
And there’d only be a row
If he did!
i True, out in foreign parts parties practise “rummy starts,”
And indulge in simian arts pretty much ;
But the monkeyishness exhibited this time must be prohibited,
And downed upon and gibbetted
As such!
Eh? The little boy declares it’s the silliest of scares
To imagine he prepares for a smash ?
Well, my little Portugee, Punch is watching, and can see,
And he thinks that simple plea
Will not wash.
Senhor Barros Gomes, too, says (as he is bound to do)
There’s no cause for big boohoo or botheration ;
That the urchin’s hands are clean, that he is not stirred by spleen ;
That that big stone does not mean
Confiscation!
Well, that little Lisbon lad may not mean to play the cad,
But the look of things is bad, Gomes mine !
Still, to your attempts to clear that small boy from motives queer,
Punch a most judicial ear
Will incline.
You, of coursewould much regret such a thing as an upset
Of a train in which our interests are united.
If the boy (and the big Boer) monkey-mischief quite give o’er,
Punch will then be—no one more—
Much delighted.
But, upon the face of it, ere the urchin we acquit,
We need just a little bit more clear light.
There’s the railway, there’s the stone, there’s the_boy; till more is
Bull stands fast, which, you will own, [known,
Seems but right.
That little Portugee has shown cheek, as all agree,
And though smallness, don’t you see, is permitted
Many privileges, still Lilliput rules not, nor will,
Though endowed with simian skill,
And sharp-witted.
“ Don't hit me—arbitrate ! " Well, young urchin, bless kind fate
That John Bull ’s no ogre, great at mere gobble.
If he were, we ’ll say, a Bear, you’d have reason good for scare,
And would soon be in a rare
Hopeless hobble!
A Hint for the Revival of an Ancient Office.—In the list
(as given by The Times) of Aldermen present at Guildhall, on the
occasion of the Shah’s visit, occurs the name of “Wagstaff. ’
What’s in a name ? Much. Why here’s an opportunity to revive
the ancient office of “ Lord Mayor’s Fool.” Wagstaff is the very
name for a jester. Thackeray would have delighted in it.
Projected Royal Visit.—Preparations are now being made for
the reception of the British Sovereign in Brazil.
Nervous Rider. “ Look here, Policeman ! I give this Horse in charge ! ”
\Pzits rein in Policeman's hand, and bolts.
CHEEK!
“ Portugal may have more to gain by an arrangement than by a conflict.”
—“ Times ” on the dJelagoa Bag Difficidty.
When a naughty little hoy, with intention to annoy,
Puts a sleeper or a stone across the rail,
He is mad if he means blocking, while, if more, ’tis simply shocking,
And enough to make a Portugee
Turn pale!
Well, out Delagoa way there’s a boy inclined to play
Such a sly, obstructive, homicidal trick,
As portrayed in Punch's picture. Gentle diplomatic stricture
Seems less applicable here than
Summary Stick!
i For this little Portugee, with an impish kind of glee
That is horrible to see in a kid,
Plans a trick which anyhow Bull ’s unable to allow,
And there’d only be a row
If he did!
i True, out in foreign parts parties practise “rummy starts,”
And indulge in simian arts pretty much ;
But the monkeyishness exhibited this time must be prohibited,
And downed upon and gibbetted
As such!
Eh? The little boy declares it’s the silliest of scares
To imagine he prepares for a smash ?
Well, my little Portugee, Punch is watching, and can see,
And he thinks that simple plea
Will not wash.
Senhor Barros Gomes, too, says (as he is bound to do)
There’s no cause for big boohoo or botheration ;
That the urchin’s hands are clean, that he is not stirred by spleen ;
That that big stone does not mean
Confiscation!
Well, that little Lisbon lad may not mean to play the cad,
But the look of things is bad, Gomes mine !
Still, to your attempts to clear that small boy from motives queer,
Punch a most judicial ear
Will incline.
You, of coursewould much regret such a thing as an upset
Of a train in which our interests are united.
If the boy (and the big Boer) monkey-mischief quite give o’er,
Punch will then be—no one more—
Much delighted.
But, upon the face of it, ere the urchin we acquit,
We need just a little bit more clear light.
There’s the railway, there’s the stone, there’s the_boy; till more is
Bull stands fast, which, you will own, [known,
Seems but right.
That little Portugee has shown cheek, as all agree,
And though smallness, don’t you see, is permitted
Many privileges, still Lilliput rules not, nor will,
Though endowed with simian skill,
And sharp-witted.
“ Don't hit me—arbitrate ! " Well, young urchin, bless kind fate
That John Bull ’s no ogre, great at mere gobble.
If he were, we ’ll say, a Bear, you’d have reason good for scare,
And would soon be in a rare
Hopeless hobble!
A Hint for the Revival of an Ancient Office.—In the list
(as given by The Times) of Aldermen present at Guildhall, on the
occasion of the Shah’s visit, occurs the name of “Wagstaff. ’
What’s in a name ? Much. Why here’s an opportunity to revive
the ancient office of “ Lord Mayor’s Fool.” Wagstaff is the very
name for a jester. Thackeray would have delighted in it.
Projected Royal Visit.—Preparations are now being made for
the reception of the British Sovereign in Brazil.