DOI issue:
August 3, 1889
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.17688#0063
August 3, 1889.]
PUNCH, OP THE LONDON CHARIVAPI.
57
with—
“ His foot should stamp and his throat should growl,
His hair should twirl and his face should scowl;
His eyes should flash and his breast protrude,
And this should be his customary attitude ! ”
Most excellent fooling, to be sure, but—-well, they say
Cervantes laughed Spain’s chivalry away, and smart
Society mockery may prove too clever by half if it help
to de-Dibdinise—pardon the coinage !—the British Tar.
Dibdin. Does the British Tar read—or sing—it ?
Mr. Punch. Well, no. I fancy he still pins his faith
to “ Tom Bowling ” and “ Lovely Polly." But he says,
with your Brother Tom;
“ The evening watch, the sounding lead,
Will sadly miss old Charley's line.
‘ Saturday Night ’ may go to bed,
His sun is set no more to shine.
‘ Sweethearts and Wives ’ though we may sing,
And toast at sea the girls on shore ;
Yet now 'tis quite another thing,
Since Charley spins the yam no more.”
_ Dibdin. Ah ! Brother Tom was partial. But I should
like well enough to try my hand at hymning the Iron-
clad and toasting the Modern Tar. The Anso7i, the
Collingivood, the Ca?nperdown, the Bodney,—there they
be, familiar names, and suggestive of song, for all their
stark and steely aspect. And I see you have an Arethusa,
too, and a formidable-looking “cruiser” she looks,
though perhaps hardly as “ saucy” as “ the frigate tight
and brave” that Shield sang of. I wonder what
Emperor William, who has come to “ visit Grand-
mamma,” thinks of Grandmamma’s squadrons? Well,
anyhow, it is a Big Show, and well worth seeing, even if
one has to flit from St. Pancras to Portsmouth for the
purpose. Here’s a health to Admirals Balrd, Tryon,
and Tracey, and success to their Autumn Manoeuvres!
Here ’s luck, too, to your steel-clad squadrons, and the
Tars who tend them; may they find spirit and skill
to face whatever foe, and a worthy Ocean Bard to hymn
their valour and their victories !
Mr. Punch. Hear! hear ! And don’t be doubtful,
my dear Dibdin. If nobody else should turn up worthy
of wearing your mantle, why, I 'll don it myself! ! !
TWOPENCE COLOUREDS
“Ha ! Ha ! Once more the Ranger is Free 1 ”
[The Judges dismissed Mr. Simms’ appeal for a mandamus to compel the Magistrate to
issue a summons against H.R.H. the Duke of Cambridge.]
MODUS QPERANDI”
The last night of the Operatic Season. Augustus Druriolanus
Triumphans is to be congratulated. A big success throughout,
including the visit in State of the Shah and their Royal Highnesses
the Prince and Princess of Wales. Memorable and brilliant evening.
The biggest successes have been Borneo et Juliette and Die Meister-
singer, the latter having been better done here, so even the
End of Season. Triumphal March.
Wagnerites admit, than at [Bayreuth. Mefistofele was grand,
and the ensemble of sweet singers could not have been easily sur-
passed. It is difficult to beat (who would be so cruel ?) Albani,
Ella Russell, Maggie MacIntyre, Melba & Co., not forgetting
the ever-as-useful-as-ornamental Frau Bauermeistersinger ?
And on the “spear side” who could be better than the two De
Reszkes, Jean and Edouard ? Band and conductors likewise
excellent, and if the Hall, of Covent Garden, with a Gardenia Glad-
stonia in his button-hole, had only once the pleasure of welcoming
the G. 0. M. and offering him a cup of tea during an entr'acte, it is
no fault of anyone’s, but only the misfortune of the Great Golden
Weddingist, who could find but one opera-tune-ity of visiting the
Opera House. But at all events he heard Borneo et Juliette, which
was a rich and rare treat for anyone. We drink to our next
merry May meeting ! Salve, Imperator Operaticus !
THE ORLY ONE!
A Correspondent sends us the following from the advertisements
in The Christian World:—
CULTURED, earnest, godly Young Man desires a PASTORATE. Vivid
preacher, musical voice, brilliant organiser. Tall, and of good appear-
ance. Blameless life. Very highest references. Beloved by all. Salary £120.
Fancy! this prize to be obtained for only £120!! and the sum is
his own valuation of himself! So that Modesty is to be added to his
merits, which, of course, would be taken for granted by any one
reading the above advertisement.
A SHOCKING BAD HAND.
Scribe {to Professor). Do you mean to say that you can infer a
man’s character from his handwriting? Well, then, what do you
think of this ? {Hands him a specimen.)
Professor. The writer is a man of some ability, but altogether
destitute of moral sense. If not a downright villain, he must be
a very unscrupulous fellow, and not to be trusted on any account
whatever. I can read his character at a glance, though not his
characters. Scribe. How so ?_
Prof. His writing is so illegible that I can’t decipher it. A man
who won’t take the pains to write a legible hand must be so utterly
regardless of the trouble he gives to everybody who has to make his
scrawl out, is so viciously inconsiderate, that he wouldn’t stick at
committing any atrocity which it would cost him the slightest
exertion to refrain from. I judge him to be a rogue, a swindler,
and a thief—capable of anything but forgery. Whose is this
disgraceful scribble ?
Scribe. Well—a—to teLl you the truth, in fact, it’s mine!
Latest Betting on the Royal Double Event.-
odds so long as they ’re happy ? ” Fife to one.
-“What’s the
PUNCH, OP THE LONDON CHARIVAPI.
57
with—
“ His foot should stamp and his throat should growl,
His hair should twirl and his face should scowl;
His eyes should flash and his breast protrude,
And this should be his customary attitude ! ”
Most excellent fooling, to be sure, but—-well, they say
Cervantes laughed Spain’s chivalry away, and smart
Society mockery may prove too clever by half if it help
to de-Dibdinise—pardon the coinage !—the British Tar.
Dibdin. Does the British Tar read—or sing—it ?
Mr. Punch. Well, no. I fancy he still pins his faith
to “ Tom Bowling ” and “ Lovely Polly." But he says,
with your Brother Tom;
“ The evening watch, the sounding lead,
Will sadly miss old Charley's line.
‘ Saturday Night ’ may go to bed,
His sun is set no more to shine.
‘ Sweethearts and Wives ’ though we may sing,
And toast at sea the girls on shore ;
Yet now 'tis quite another thing,
Since Charley spins the yam no more.”
_ Dibdin. Ah ! Brother Tom was partial. But I should
like well enough to try my hand at hymning the Iron-
clad and toasting the Modern Tar. The Anso7i, the
Collingivood, the Ca?nperdown, the Bodney,—there they
be, familiar names, and suggestive of song, for all their
stark and steely aspect. And I see you have an Arethusa,
too, and a formidable-looking “cruiser” she looks,
though perhaps hardly as “ saucy” as “ the frigate tight
and brave” that Shield sang of. I wonder what
Emperor William, who has come to “ visit Grand-
mamma,” thinks of Grandmamma’s squadrons? Well,
anyhow, it is a Big Show, and well worth seeing, even if
one has to flit from St. Pancras to Portsmouth for the
purpose. Here’s a health to Admirals Balrd, Tryon,
and Tracey, and success to their Autumn Manoeuvres!
Here ’s luck, too, to your steel-clad squadrons, and the
Tars who tend them; may they find spirit and skill
to face whatever foe, and a worthy Ocean Bard to hymn
their valour and their victories !
Mr. Punch. Hear! hear ! And don’t be doubtful,
my dear Dibdin. If nobody else should turn up worthy
of wearing your mantle, why, I 'll don it myself! ! !
TWOPENCE COLOUREDS
“Ha ! Ha ! Once more the Ranger is Free 1 ”
[The Judges dismissed Mr. Simms’ appeal for a mandamus to compel the Magistrate to
issue a summons against H.R.H. the Duke of Cambridge.]
MODUS QPERANDI”
The last night of the Operatic Season. Augustus Druriolanus
Triumphans is to be congratulated. A big success throughout,
including the visit in State of the Shah and their Royal Highnesses
the Prince and Princess of Wales. Memorable and brilliant evening.
The biggest successes have been Borneo et Juliette and Die Meister-
singer, the latter having been better done here, so even the
End of Season. Triumphal March.
Wagnerites admit, than at [Bayreuth. Mefistofele was grand,
and the ensemble of sweet singers could not have been easily sur-
passed. It is difficult to beat (who would be so cruel ?) Albani,
Ella Russell, Maggie MacIntyre, Melba & Co., not forgetting
the ever-as-useful-as-ornamental Frau Bauermeistersinger ?
And on the “spear side” who could be better than the two De
Reszkes, Jean and Edouard ? Band and conductors likewise
excellent, and if the Hall, of Covent Garden, with a Gardenia Glad-
stonia in his button-hole, had only once the pleasure of welcoming
the G. 0. M. and offering him a cup of tea during an entr'acte, it is
no fault of anyone’s, but only the misfortune of the Great Golden
Weddingist, who could find but one opera-tune-ity of visiting the
Opera House. But at all events he heard Borneo et Juliette, which
was a rich and rare treat for anyone. We drink to our next
merry May meeting ! Salve, Imperator Operaticus !
THE ORLY ONE!
A Correspondent sends us the following from the advertisements
in The Christian World:—
CULTURED, earnest, godly Young Man desires a PASTORATE. Vivid
preacher, musical voice, brilliant organiser. Tall, and of good appear-
ance. Blameless life. Very highest references. Beloved by all. Salary £120.
Fancy! this prize to be obtained for only £120!! and the sum is
his own valuation of himself! So that Modesty is to be added to his
merits, which, of course, would be taken for granted by any one
reading the above advertisement.
A SHOCKING BAD HAND.
Scribe {to Professor). Do you mean to say that you can infer a
man’s character from his handwriting? Well, then, what do you
think of this ? {Hands him a specimen.)
Professor. The writer is a man of some ability, but altogether
destitute of moral sense. If not a downright villain, he must be
a very unscrupulous fellow, and not to be trusted on any account
whatever. I can read his character at a glance, though not his
characters. Scribe. How so ?_
Prof. His writing is so illegible that I can’t decipher it. A man
who won’t take the pains to write a legible hand must be so utterly
regardless of the trouble he gives to everybody who has to make his
scrawl out, is so viciously inconsiderate, that he wouldn’t stick at
committing any atrocity which it would cost him the slightest
exertion to refrain from. I judge him to be a rogue, a swindler,
and a thief—capable of anything but forgery. Whose is this
disgraceful scribble ?
Scribe. Well—a—to teLl you the truth, in fact, it’s mine!
Latest Betting on the Royal Double Event.-
odds so long as they ’re happy ? ” Fife to one.
-“What’s the