Punch (73.1877)

December 29, 1877.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

299

"JE N'EN VOIS PAS LA NECESSITE."

The Italian House of Commons has voted the Penal
Code proposed by the Minister of Grace and Justice,
Signor Manctnt, which, besides abolishing capital punish-
ment, amid the applause of the galleries, admits neces-
sity or uncontrollable impulse—forza irresistibile—a,s an
extenuation of crime. This, in the event of its being finally
enacted, would indeed be a saving clause for criminals.
If, according to our English form of indictment, Italians
commit crimes because of " being instigated by the
devil," and necessity is to extenuate crime, and "needs
must when the devil drives "—who need ever be hanged,
even if the gallows were left standing ? Luckily, Italy
has a House of Lords in her Senate, which may be safely
trusted to veto—if, indeed, it have not already vetoed—
Signor Mancini's rather rash and risky measure, and leave
forza irresistible still face to face with Jack Ketch—to
try conclusions which is stronger, the irresistible im-
pulse that leads to cutting throats, or the fear of the
penny cord that compresses them. Punch, on the whole,
backs penny cord—particularly in a land where most
men carry knives, and where assassinations run to the
tune of some thousands per annum.

AN APOLOGY.

China?naniccc Mistress (with tears in her Voice). "See, Mary, what your | limelight went out ?
Carelessness has done ! Yotr have broken one of my favourite Cops I "

Maid. "Yes, M'm. I'm very Sorry, for I'm very paetial to old China
myself ! "

A CHRISTMAS CATECHISM.

(For the Use of Infant Schools.)

Wno made the first Plum-pudding, and did he take a
pill after it ?

Was kissing under the Mistletoe in fashion with the
Druids, or were they more in favour of kissing under the
rose ?

How came it that St. George was long esteemed the
patron Saint of Snapdragons ?
Why is it that a Beadle always gets a Christmas-box ?
Do you think that Robinson Crusoe in all his foreign
travels ever climbed a Christmas-tree ?
Who invented Mince-pies, and how many did he eat ?
Are you fond of Christmas Waits, and which do you
like best—the long Waits that occur between the scenes
on the first night of a Pantomime, or the short Weights
that occur when you buy a pound of plum-cake, or an
ounce of sugar-plums or toffee at a street-stall?
Where were Harlequin and Columbine when the

Servia Reciiristened.—Time-Servia.

in.

From Mr. Parnell, on his receiving a Challenge from the Proprietor
of a damaged Steam-Roller.

Sir,

_ I am not surprised that, provided you can get your machine
on its side, lengthways across Temple Bar, you should back yourself
to stop the entire traffic of Fleet Street. But I am not accustomed
to entering into trivial contests of this kind. Get a couple of Cir-
cuses, half-a-dozen Furniture-vans, and a Wild Beast Show into Pall
Mall Place, and back, and then I may look at you.

Yours, &c, S. C. Parnell.

iv.

From Marshal MacMahon, on his refasing to be fired, for a Wager,

from a Cannon.

Monsieur,

Your challenge, inspired doubtless by my recent situation,
has been made under a complete misconception of the circumstances
which surround and direct me. It is true that, notwithstanding
that the gunpowder was ready in the Chamber, I have reposed for
some time with my head looking from the cannon's mouth. But I
had no intention of being fired off. No. That is the business of
acrobats, not of Presidents. I have, therefore, got out.
Accept, Monsieur, the assurance of my distinguished consideration.

MacMahon.

v.

From Prince Bismarck, on being invited, by the Stationers' Company,
to write a Prophetic Almanack against the Editor of u Old
Moore."

You want to know what 'a going to happen next ? Try your

A REMARKABLE PIECE OF NEWS.

Here is a startling piece of intelligence from the Glasgow Herald.
We should scarcely have expected it to reach us via Irvine :—

" Irvine,—The Harbour-Master reported that the north pole had been
washed away, and he was instructed to have a temporary one erected at once,
and to make arrangements for the erection of a permanent one."

This will naturally be annoying to Captain Sir G. Nares, Captain
Stevenson, and. their gallant shipmates of the Alert and Discovery.
They can never hope to " pick up " the old Pole now! On the other
hand, the erection of a temporary substitute, and then the provision
of a permanent Pole, will furnish agreeable and useful occupation to
the Arctic voyagers of the future, whom we presume the Harbour-
Master of Irvine will at once proceed to enrol. It is a very flattering
commission for a provincial official, and one who, hitherto, however
respectable, has certainly not been prominent in Arctic enterprise.

own Sphinx. ' Yours, &c, Bismarck. I Turkey—Forfeits

Christmas Games

(For European Powers, big and little).

Austro-Hungary.—The Race Game.
England.—Cross Questions and Crooked Answers.
France.—Consequences.
Germany.—Beggar my Neighbour.
Russia.—The Krieg-Spiel.
Servia.—Follow my Leader.
Greece.—Catch as Catch Can.