Punch (73.1877)

July 28, 1877.]

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

25

INSULT TO INJURY."

Domestic {to Family Grocer). " Nothing this Morning, thank you. But
Missis says, -will you get a Stamp, and post this Letter to the Co-
operative Stores ?"

BLUECOAT BOYS AND BRUTES.

hupp the Black and Bluecnt Skool Monitors wants a
good Talkin to sum on 'em—if not halso a good Idin.

It may seem hall wery manly for midel-haged and
helderly Gents, parties wot's forgott their own seool
days, a good menny Hanimles' Friends as ood cry ten
thousand murders at tuchin up a Oss on the Rawr, to
stick up for Floggin at Skools and snere at are a word
said agin it as morkish sentiment; hut then wooden't it
he ekally manly o me to hadwocate unlimitted non-hin-
terference with the libberty of hevery Britton to wallup
his own Moke ? But i spose 'tis a feller feelin makes
'em so wunderus kind to that are Hannimle in com-
parison with the Human Specie. The latter rayther
enlistes the simpathy of yures Trooly,

Sam Tatues.

Barrow Road, July 18th.

PACES AND FLOWERS.

A Summer Song.

Dulness avaunt! English summer smiles sunnily

Full in your face.
Seasons of late have been jumbled up funnily,

Each out oi place.
Now cynics, wont to vituperate viciously

Wearisome wet,
Melt, and admit that our sun can deliciously

Beam on us yet.
Prophets preposterous, fain to Russ-panic us,

Now may shut up.
Here is a health to our Phoebus Britannicus !

Brim we the cup !
Paganish ? Pooh ! Pan's astir in my blood to-day.

Faith, and why not ?
Nature's strong life-stream's aflow in full flood to-day.

(Pheugh! It is hot!)
Fancies fantastic will flash and will float on it—

Bubbles, no more.
Vogue la galere ! Let us launch Frolic's boat on it,

Spurning the shore.
Here is a rose might have budded by Bendemeer,

Crimson, dew-laden.
Thank the flower-loving Immortals that send 'em here,

Waifs from their Aidenn.
What if ours fade ? Poke no pessimist chaff at us,

Murmurings stint.
Beauty's a prophecy ; while Love deigns laugh at us,

Death's a mere hint.
Then here's a face ! Wicked eyes in full battery

Levelled at mine,
Put a stern veto on Tom-Mooreish flattery

Humatn Mr. Punch,

Is a Boy a Wertebrate Hanimal ? Enny ow e've got a Backbone,
and e can feel. Then wy not Aloud the Bennyfitt o the Wiveysection Hact ? j " M' ulllJ " ^j^gten a^dTmile'
Ain't it Wiveysection to cut into a Littel cove with a Burch Rodd ? The conse- WMle a fond word-spinner limns her veraciously
quens of Witch you sawr the uther Day apeers to a bin that pore littel s eller, 1
William Arthur Gibbs, only 12 yere ov hage at the Bluecoat Scool burched
once for runnin away from Crule Treatment bein Bully'd and Beet by a
Monnitor, then runnin away agin brort back wunce more and Shutt up in the
Infirmery wile the Master was a thinkin wot Punnishment to Inwent for
im, e, in Terrer and Haggany o Mind no Dout lookin forrad to Anuther
Burchin Went Mad and ung is Self. Wot e must a Suffer'd frum is fust
Flogin to make im—a Kid ov 12—comitt Sooiside! Spose a Pupy ad bin
wipt anythink like it by a broot ov a Master wooden't the Siety fur the Pur-
wenshun o Crulety to Hanimals a bin down upon Ira ? If i wos to Wallup my
Donkey arf as sewere wooden't They be down upon Mee ? Jest wooden't
they!

In coarse Boys as Wei as Donkeys can't be Manidged Without bein Wallup'd
moderate at Times when they desarves it, but wot i sez is wy is there wun
Lawr fur Donkys and Anuther for Boys ? If yer purtects Donkys frum
bein wallupt onmercifull, purtect Boys too. As to Wiveysecshun of dum
Hanimles, there's Rools and Reglations to prewent that from bein carry'd
Too Fur. Perticler wen the Operiorators is Fissishens and Surgins Performin
Ixperiments for the Hadwancement o Siense and tbe bennyfitt of there Suferin
feller Creeters with their Minds Coold and Collected. But Not so wen the
Wiveyseckshun's Perform'd with a Burch Rodd by a Peddigog wery likely in
wirelent Pashun. Wen scoolboys Is wiveysected with Burch, ave it Dun by
Lieens'd Parties under Rools and Regilashons likewise, and, like at Noogit in
the presense of members of the Force and a Perfesshonal Docter. Leastways
make it so at crice Ors-spittle or the Bluecut Skool as it's called, witch Black
and Bluecut Scool wood be the beter name for it wot with the Nockin about
and Betin and Bullyin and Burchin as Drives Boys to ang theireelyes.
Anuther boy honly a few months Ago tried to committ Sooiside there, witch
the joory at the Crowner's hinkvest got that fack out o the Skool Warden,
Major Brackenburt. Wile Rooshan torpedos is a Blowin Turkish Monitors

vol. lxxiii. d

Well, but a flesh-and-blood Peri might graciously

Once in a while.
No ? Well, floricomous despot, I'm dutiful;

Yet I must say
Flower-world never bore blossom so beautif ul

A s- Well - a- d ay !

Just to be gagged by those digits delectable,

Well might one dare
Violate rules the most sage and respectable,

Proper, and fair.
Take them away, they but tempt one to trespassing.

Yield me this rose
Coiled in your hair. From those lips is a " yes " puling

As they unclose ?
Summer's astir in me. Pardon a levity

Born of the time.
Summer is short, yet, in spite of its brevity,

Sweet is its prime.
Though it may bake us, or chill us, or bring to us

Swithinish showers,
Ever it sendeth us song-birds to sing to us,
Faces and flowers.

declaration of england.

" Is and remains forbidden " {in Anglican Sees).—
Private-earing. ______

How Effectually to Obstruct the Passage of the
Balkans.—Send Parnell and Biggar.