DOI issue:
February 25, 1860
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16865#0084
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [February 25, I860.
eulogy on the Rose of Castille, with introduced compliments to the
admirable vocalism of Miss Louisa Pyne and Mr. Harrison, at the
end of which the Speaker smilingly informed Mr. P. that it was not
the composer who was being talked of, but some Irish magistrate named
Balfe, who had been oppressed, but that the House was only too
happy to hear Mr. Punch oil any subject whatever. Mr. Punch was
not in the slightest degree abashed, toid the Speaker that he, Mr. P.,
knew quite well what he was about, and delicately worked round the
subject from the Royal Italian Opera House, and Mr. Wallace's new
opera, to the Floral Hall, and so to the Volunteers’ Ball, and thence to
the Volunteer Movement, and to the state of the country generally,
until the House, instructed and delighted, rose.
Thursday. Caligula made his horse Incitatus a Boman Consul (in
imitation of which feat a good many British and Foreign Consuls are
made out of asses) and it is a pity that we have not an Hereditary
Legislator out of the Incitatus stock. His lordship would have been
useful to-night, when another Hereditary Legislator, Lord Redesdale,
actually thought proper to invite all the other Hereditary Legislators
to consider whether it would not be well for them to give their officiaL
attention to racing matters. He pathetically deplored the evil practice
of putting “ ridiculously light weights ” upon racers, inasmuch as the
practice encouraged gambling, and like a practical Hereditary Legis-
lator, he was provided with a proposition to remedy so terrible an evil.
He suggested that no horse should, after this year, be allowed to run
with less than Seven Stone on him. It is due to his hearers to add,
that they not only gave their best ears to the subject, but showed their
acquaintance with it; for when Lord Redesdale inadvertently said
“ pounds” instead of “ stone,” he was instantly corrected by a dozen
Hereditary Legislators. The question, he said, was too important
to be disposed of hastily, as if it were a mere Church Hates Bill or
Reform Bill, and therefore he would fix the second reading of his
measure at a distant date, in order that the Hereditary Legislature
might have.ample time to meditate on the proposed alteration. Perhaps
witnesses had better be examined, in which case Mr. Punch would like
to hear the sentiments of certain Crimean Hereditary Legislators, who
should know something of horses, having introduced a new mode of
feeding cavalry chargers, namely, by leaving them to devour one
another’s tails.
Lord Ebury wanted a document (upon the subject of a revision of
the Burial Service) which was in the private library of the Archbishop
of Canterbury, and was severely abused by the Chancellor and
Lord Brougham for making so ungentlemanly a demand. Lord
Brougham, indeed, who visited the House of Commons on the night
of Mr. Gladstone’s budget speech, and li#d never been there in the
interim between that night and his own elevation to the Woolsack, did
not seem to have been greatly conciliated by anything he saw or heard
Down-stairs, for he pitched into the Commons uncommonly, for having
made the same demand as Lord Ebury. The Earl of Airlie
assailed the Coal proposals of the Budget, and was told that lie did
not understand the question, which was probable enough, though the
Ministerial reply could scarcely be considered civil.
Down-stairs, Lord John Russell gave notice that he should bring
in his Reform Bill on Thursday, the First of March. He had pre-
viously mentioned, in a Cocky sort of manner, that this would be an
auspicious day for the purpose, meaning that it was on a First of
March, twenty-nine years ago, that he brought in his first Reform
Bill. We don’t know what he meant by auspicious, but that Bill was
read by a majority of one only, and smashed on the first hostile amend-
ment. Is that sort of thing what our courageous young friend is
looking to?
He, our courageous young friend, then explained that the Americans
had shown their usual smartness in interpreting a treaty between
themselves and us. When we repealed the navigation laws, Jonathan
promised to be equally liberal, and in fulfilment; of his promise has
excluded us from the whole trade between New York and California,
pretending that Washington and Franklin provided for such exclu-
sion. Lord John was so struck by an appeal to the American Lord
Somers and Lord Grenville, that he could not fiud it in his heart
to say we were owdaciously cheated, as no doubt, we are^
It was then announced, by bits, that, our afiy the Elected was en-
forcing his demand for Savoy and Nice by withholding his consent, to
the union of the liberated provinces of Italy. He pretends to be afraid
lest his frontier should be endangered by a powerful Sardinian kingdom.
Lord John had to be put on the rack a lit tie to get the fact out of
him, but he finally confessed. Mr. Punch would not wonder if the
Opposition made a valuable handle ot this pleasant announcement,
before the Budget debates are over. Mr. Disraeli may, by a stress
of imagination, be conceived “ reposing the most illimitable confidence
in a sagacious Sovereign, our valued friend and ally, but a diminished
and attenuated confidence in the ministerial wisdom that, could resign
invaluable revenue as a propitiatory sacrifice to an Imperialist idea.”
Lord John further stated, that, the King of Naples is so awfully
afraid of plots, that an English officer, who bought, a cake in Naples as
! a present, to a lady, got into trouble because there was a little three-
! coloured flag on it. Neither the Poet Punch nor the Poet Cowper
will be accused of anti-monarchism, but, really 6ome lines of one ot
those great and pious bards force themselves into the memory of the
other:
“ Quevedo, as he tells his sober tale.
Asked, when in hell, to see the royal gaol;
Approved their dealings in all other things,
But where, good Sir, do you confine your Kings ?
‘ There,’ said his guide, ‘ the group is full in view ; ’
‘ Indeed,’ replied the Don, ‘ there are but few ; ’
His black interpreter the charge disdained—
‘ Few, fellow ? There are all tnat ever reigned ! ’ ”
Then came a debate on Manning our Navy, and a debate on one of the
causes which prevent its being Manned. On the first, some useful
things were—said. By the second a useful thing was done, for our
friend the Viscount of Lambeth, who now and then performs a wise
act (or wouldn’t he catch it harder for his chronic unwisdom), carried
a motion for a return of the number of floggings in the Army and Navy
for 1859. The object was, mainly, to have a new brand of condemna-
tion marked upon the system. The only professional answer was,
What other punishment avails with “riff-raff.” To which the tri-
umphant rejoinder was, Make your Services what they should be, and
y ou will enlist honest and good men, instead of riff-raff. Government
were then going to be beaten on a motion of Mr. Hennessy, for
inquiry into the manner in which candidates are nominated and
examined for the Civil Service, but Lord Palmerston prudently gave
way. A committee was appointed to consider, whether something
could not be done to promote the recreation of the people. Mr. Punch,
who it need not be said, lias done more lowards that object than any
person who ever lived has done, or any person who ever will live can
do, heartily applauds the proposal, and Sir John Trelawny, the
proposer.
Friday. Eurther confirmation of the Savoy and Nice business—our
Government is now formally apprised that if Sardinia is to be increased
France will demand part of Savoy—but not against the wishes of the
inhabitants. Mr. Punch proposes a compromise. Louis Napoleon
must not have any of the land of Savoy, but Mr. Punch offers to hand
over to him every Savoyard, organ, monkey, and white mouse in
England.
The Dissenters again trespassed on the Lords, and the Schools Bill
was a good deal mangled in Committee.
The Conservatives mean to fight the Budget, and Mr. Ducane gave
notice of an amendment. The Derbyit.e cry is to be, “ Don’t destroy
Revenue, don’t increase Income-Tax.” So there will be a regular
Mill. Pam demands that there be no stopping, and that the fight go
on day by day till one party is floored.
After the Conversazione (Punch thanks thee, Ben, for teaching him
that word), Mu. Sidney Herbert moved the Army Estimates, ana
got a vote for 113,362 men, which number does not include our Indian
Army of upwards of 90,000 soldiers. Sir Robert Peel fired off somo
rather amusing buffoonery at the Volunteers, especially at “ fat
lawyers.” Bobby is not a dull Bobby, but is sadly misplaced in the
House of Commons. Why does not Paddy Green engage him to
take the Chair at the Harmonic Rabbits ?
THE PROSPECTS OF PAPER.
The Times, in an interesting article on the subject of paper-manu-
facture, adverts to the fact, that for some time past there has existed in
this country a great, dearth of rags, because their exportation has been
prohibited by the majority of foreign states. The demand for those
materials, however, will very soon be supplied by the operation of an
ever-increasing Income-Tax, imposed upon the insecure earnings of
industry, which will reduce multitudes of professional and mercantile
men, with their wives and families, to beggary and starvation, or the
workhouse; in either of which cases their relinquished garments will
afford the paper-makers abundance of rags.
The Pursuit of a Policeman.
Sir Richard Mayne, in one of his letters to Mr. Bryan King,
begins it by saying, “1 consider it my duty.” Most noble words,
considering the high position that Sir Richard occupies! We wish
that the entire police force would only follow the example of their
magnanimous chief, and never do more than what they considered
their “duty.” The Force, then, would be more of a Moral, and less
of a Physical, Force.
“ SOMETHING ROTTEN IN TIIE STATE OF DENMARK.”
What can be expected but Ministerial contusion in Denmark, where
the Minister just out is Rott-wit, and the Minister just, in is Mad-mg.
A curious Correspondent, by the way, writes to ask, whether Matt-
wig is any, and if any what, relation to March-hare I
eulogy on the Rose of Castille, with introduced compliments to the
admirable vocalism of Miss Louisa Pyne and Mr. Harrison, at the
end of which the Speaker smilingly informed Mr. P. that it was not
the composer who was being talked of, but some Irish magistrate named
Balfe, who had been oppressed, but that the House was only too
happy to hear Mr. Punch oil any subject whatever. Mr. Punch was
not in the slightest degree abashed, toid the Speaker that he, Mr. P.,
knew quite well what he was about, and delicately worked round the
subject from the Royal Italian Opera House, and Mr. Wallace's new
opera, to the Floral Hall, and so to the Volunteers’ Ball, and thence to
the Volunteer Movement, and to the state of the country generally,
until the House, instructed and delighted, rose.
Thursday. Caligula made his horse Incitatus a Boman Consul (in
imitation of which feat a good many British and Foreign Consuls are
made out of asses) and it is a pity that we have not an Hereditary
Legislator out of the Incitatus stock. His lordship would have been
useful to-night, when another Hereditary Legislator, Lord Redesdale,
actually thought proper to invite all the other Hereditary Legislators
to consider whether it would not be well for them to give their officiaL
attention to racing matters. He pathetically deplored the evil practice
of putting “ ridiculously light weights ” upon racers, inasmuch as the
practice encouraged gambling, and like a practical Hereditary Legis-
lator, he was provided with a proposition to remedy so terrible an evil.
He suggested that no horse should, after this year, be allowed to run
with less than Seven Stone on him. It is due to his hearers to add,
that they not only gave their best ears to the subject, but showed their
acquaintance with it; for when Lord Redesdale inadvertently said
“ pounds” instead of “ stone,” he was instantly corrected by a dozen
Hereditary Legislators. The question, he said, was too important
to be disposed of hastily, as if it were a mere Church Hates Bill or
Reform Bill, and therefore he would fix the second reading of his
measure at a distant date, in order that the Hereditary Legislature
might have.ample time to meditate on the proposed alteration. Perhaps
witnesses had better be examined, in which case Mr. Punch would like
to hear the sentiments of certain Crimean Hereditary Legislators, who
should know something of horses, having introduced a new mode of
feeding cavalry chargers, namely, by leaving them to devour one
another’s tails.
Lord Ebury wanted a document (upon the subject of a revision of
the Burial Service) which was in the private library of the Archbishop
of Canterbury, and was severely abused by the Chancellor and
Lord Brougham for making so ungentlemanly a demand. Lord
Brougham, indeed, who visited the House of Commons on the night
of Mr. Gladstone’s budget speech, and li#d never been there in the
interim between that night and his own elevation to the Woolsack, did
not seem to have been greatly conciliated by anything he saw or heard
Down-stairs, for he pitched into the Commons uncommonly, for having
made the same demand as Lord Ebury. The Earl of Airlie
assailed the Coal proposals of the Budget, and was told that lie did
not understand the question, which was probable enough, though the
Ministerial reply could scarcely be considered civil.
Down-stairs, Lord John Russell gave notice that he should bring
in his Reform Bill on Thursday, the First of March. He had pre-
viously mentioned, in a Cocky sort of manner, that this would be an
auspicious day for the purpose, meaning that it was on a First of
March, twenty-nine years ago, that he brought in his first Reform
Bill. We don’t know what he meant by auspicious, but that Bill was
read by a majority of one only, and smashed on the first hostile amend-
ment. Is that sort of thing what our courageous young friend is
looking to?
He, our courageous young friend, then explained that the Americans
had shown their usual smartness in interpreting a treaty between
themselves and us. When we repealed the navigation laws, Jonathan
promised to be equally liberal, and in fulfilment; of his promise has
excluded us from the whole trade between New York and California,
pretending that Washington and Franklin provided for such exclu-
sion. Lord John was so struck by an appeal to the American Lord
Somers and Lord Grenville, that he could not fiud it in his heart
to say we were owdaciously cheated, as no doubt, we are^
It was then announced, by bits, that, our afiy the Elected was en-
forcing his demand for Savoy and Nice by withholding his consent, to
the union of the liberated provinces of Italy. He pretends to be afraid
lest his frontier should be endangered by a powerful Sardinian kingdom.
Lord John had to be put on the rack a lit tie to get the fact out of
him, but he finally confessed. Mr. Punch would not wonder if the
Opposition made a valuable handle ot this pleasant announcement,
before the Budget debates are over. Mr. Disraeli may, by a stress
of imagination, be conceived “ reposing the most illimitable confidence
in a sagacious Sovereign, our valued friend and ally, but a diminished
and attenuated confidence in the ministerial wisdom that, could resign
invaluable revenue as a propitiatory sacrifice to an Imperialist idea.”
Lord John further stated, that, the King of Naples is so awfully
afraid of plots, that an English officer, who bought, a cake in Naples as
! a present, to a lady, got into trouble because there was a little three-
! coloured flag on it. Neither the Poet Punch nor the Poet Cowper
will be accused of anti-monarchism, but, really 6ome lines of one ot
those great and pious bards force themselves into the memory of the
other:
“ Quevedo, as he tells his sober tale.
Asked, when in hell, to see the royal gaol;
Approved their dealings in all other things,
But where, good Sir, do you confine your Kings ?
‘ There,’ said his guide, ‘ the group is full in view ; ’
‘ Indeed,’ replied the Don, ‘ there are but few ; ’
His black interpreter the charge disdained—
‘ Few, fellow ? There are all tnat ever reigned ! ’ ”
Then came a debate on Manning our Navy, and a debate on one of the
causes which prevent its being Manned. On the first, some useful
things were—said. By the second a useful thing was done, for our
friend the Viscount of Lambeth, who now and then performs a wise
act (or wouldn’t he catch it harder for his chronic unwisdom), carried
a motion for a return of the number of floggings in the Army and Navy
for 1859. The object was, mainly, to have a new brand of condemna-
tion marked upon the system. The only professional answer was,
What other punishment avails with “riff-raff.” To which the tri-
umphant rejoinder was, Make your Services what they should be, and
y ou will enlist honest and good men, instead of riff-raff. Government
were then going to be beaten on a motion of Mr. Hennessy, for
inquiry into the manner in which candidates are nominated and
examined for the Civil Service, but Lord Palmerston prudently gave
way. A committee was appointed to consider, whether something
could not be done to promote the recreation of the people. Mr. Punch,
who it need not be said, lias done more lowards that object than any
person who ever lived has done, or any person who ever will live can
do, heartily applauds the proposal, and Sir John Trelawny, the
proposer.
Friday. Eurther confirmation of the Savoy and Nice business—our
Government is now formally apprised that if Sardinia is to be increased
France will demand part of Savoy—but not against the wishes of the
inhabitants. Mr. Punch proposes a compromise. Louis Napoleon
must not have any of the land of Savoy, but Mr. Punch offers to hand
over to him every Savoyard, organ, monkey, and white mouse in
England.
The Dissenters again trespassed on the Lords, and the Schools Bill
was a good deal mangled in Committee.
The Conservatives mean to fight the Budget, and Mr. Ducane gave
notice of an amendment. The Derbyit.e cry is to be, “ Don’t destroy
Revenue, don’t increase Income-Tax.” So there will be a regular
Mill. Pam demands that there be no stopping, and that the fight go
on day by day till one party is floored.
After the Conversazione (Punch thanks thee, Ben, for teaching him
that word), Mu. Sidney Herbert moved the Army Estimates, ana
got a vote for 113,362 men, which number does not include our Indian
Army of upwards of 90,000 soldiers. Sir Robert Peel fired off somo
rather amusing buffoonery at the Volunteers, especially at “ fat
lawyers.” Bobby is not a dull Bobby, but is sadly misplaced in the
House of Commons. Why does not Paddy Green engage him to
take the Chair at the Harmonic Rabbits ?
THE PROSPECTS OF PAPER.
The Times, in an interesting article on the subject of paper-manu-
facture, adverts to the fact, that for some time past there has existed in
this country a great, dearth of rags, because their exportation has been
prohibited by the majority of foreign states. The demand for those
materials, however, will very soon be supplied by the operation of an
ever-increasing Income-Tax, imposed upon the insecure earnings of
industry, which will reduce multitudes of professional and mercantile
men, with their wives and families, to beggary and starvation, or the
workhouse; in either of which cases their relinquished garments will
afford the paper-makers abundance of rags.
The Pursuit of a Policeman.
Sir Richard Mayne, in one of his letters to Mr. Bryan King,
begins it by saying, “1 consider it my duty.” Most noble words,
considering the high position that Sir Richard occupies! We wish
that the entire police force would only follow the example of their
magnanimous chief, and never do more than what they considered
their “duty.” The Force, then, would be more of a Moral, and less
of a Physical, Force.
“ SOMETHING ROTTEN IN TIIE STATE OF DENMARK.”
What can be expected but Ministerial contusion in Denmark, where
the Minister just out is Rott-wit, and the Minister just, in is Mad-mg.
A curious Correspondent, by the way, writes to ask, whether Matt-
wig is any, and if any what, relation to March-hare I