Punch: Punch (38.1860)

<fc«s 16, i860.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

239

AND WATER; OR, THE LONDON VOLUNTEERS.

THROUGH FIRE

Some talk of Alexander,

And some of Hercules,—

The Chief whose martial dander,

Asked worlds to stand at ease—

The Sayers of the Prize-Ring,

In high Olympian spheres,—

But both, I’ll be bound, now-a-days would
be found

Enrolled in the Volunteers.

Our soldiers they are heroes,

We know, in facing fire ;

Our tars reduce to zeros
All fears the seas inspire.

But for going through fire and water,

—To say nothing of small boys’ jeers—
There’s no service, I swear, that can compare
With the London Volunteers.

In June we ’re now parading,

Last month was merry May,

But for Volunteer brigading
We ’ve not had one dry day !

The aforesaid Alexander,

As a hero of Greece, appears
Of our kin to be, for dripping are we
Poor London Volunteers!

Umbrellas and alpacas
We scorn, and oil-skin capes ;

And the rain-drops from our shakos
May trickle down our napes.

We may continue drilling,

And manoeuvring about for years,

But ‘ Wetter'uns ’ some needn’t hope to
become

In the London Volunteers.

But, yet there’s no complaining;

Rheumatics we defy,

And though cats and dogs it’s raining,

We keep our powder dry.

Little think the small boys shouting
1 Who shot the dog ? ’ in our ears.

What an inward fire flares up to inspire
Us London Volunteers.

Then a fig for show’rs and sneerers,

Let’s show Sir Robert yet:

We can laugh at fire and fleerers.

As we’ve laughed at heavy wet.

And we hope to teach the foeman,

Who on our shore appears, (scorn.

If home rains we’ve borne, French reins we
As London Volunteers.

Three cheers for all who ’re willing
To be wetted through and through !

For those who stick to drilling
Till all is damp and blue.

May none of us blow our heads off,

Whether privates or brigadiers,

And the Queen, I pray, have one dry day
For reviewing the Volunteers!

Little Captain of Volunteers (whom no obstacles can daunt). “Hullo! Halt!—Um.—Let me see.—Now, then! As a Front Rank

Standing—Pre-pare to—Jump ! ”

THE GREAT UNTAXED AND REFORM.

Mr. Bright the other evening obliged the House of Commons with
;an interesting and instructive calculation of the collective wealth of
the unrepresented classes, concluding with the following summary :—

‘ The whole income of these working-classes I believe to be understated at
£312,000,000 a year, while tho whole income represented by all the Income-Tax
'Schedules in April, 1857, amounted to £313,000,0o0.”

These are very important figures, but should Mr. Bright have been
the man to cite them ? He estimated the income of the 500,000
persons proposed to be enfranchised under the Reform Bill, the richest
of the unrepresented classes, at £80 a year each. At that rate the
represented differ from the unrepresented classes chiefly in paying no
Income-Tax. The only pecuniary advantage which they could derive

from representation would be that of paying no taxes whatever. This
may be a consideration which Mr. Henley might very appropriately
advance on his side of the House and of the question; and it is one
which Mr. Bright also might urge to some purpose at a public
meeting composed of non-electors of £80 per annum. But what effect
did Mr. Bright expect his arithmetic to produce upon the House of
Commons ? The effect, it would seem, of persuading Income-Tax payers,
and the representatives of Income-Tax payers, to vote for a change >■
which would probably result in throwing the whole weight of taxation
on their own shoulders. Mb. Bright should have said nothing about
the vast mass of unrepresented income that pays no Income-Tax. He
has been very unjustly charged with animosity to the upper classes;
it is quite clear that he entertains a very high idea of their disinte-
restedness and capability of self-sacrifice.