Punch: Punch (52.1867)

IV

PUNCH, Oil THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

[Junk 29, 1867.

“ T ’ll have none of that,
he sang out lustily—

Did I ever sing you Du. Maginn’s song on William the Fourth’s crowning?” And

“ I suppose all was right that Will How ley has done,

That for oiling the king he has warrant divine,

But when I am the Primate, as sure as a gun
I shall hallow my King with a flagon of wine.

And let nobody think that a drop of the drink
On head or on bosom away I shall fling,
jSTo, bemitred I 'll stand, with the cup in my hand,

And 1 ’ll cry, ‘ Here, you beggars, three cheers for your king! ’

“ As for kissing the girls-”

“ My dear Lord,” said Mrs. Punch, “ consider the neighbours.”

“ I do. I consider them fools, as Luther says, if they don’t like song, especially mine.
“ The Coronation Oath-”

Anything else ? ”

“ By George, by Jove, by jingo, and by gum,” as another great bard wrote, “ I ’ll have no oaths. They hamper
a sovereign. Even that windbag, King Turveydrop, was troubled by his oath—to be sure he could not understand it.”

“ The Liber Regalis has been, since Edward the Third, the authority for coronation business here,” said Mrs.

Punch. “ It is kept with religious care in the archives of the Dean and Chapter of Westminster.”

“ Write to Dean Stanley and ask him, with my regards, to send it me by the Parcels Delivery Company.”

“ You will find its essence in Strutt, dear.”

“ Yes, I believe the essence of a coronation is in strut, dear,” said Mr. Punch, laughing riotously.

That night he had a dream. It came through the gate of horn. He beheld himself, like the King of Hungary#
bestriding a magnificent steed, which stood on a mound composed of earth contributed by the four quarters of the
World. In fact, it was the World itself. And in his right hand was something which was not the Hungarian Sword,
but a mightier weapon. It was the Punch Pen ! And gazing forth with lion courage and eagle keenness upon creation,
tie waved with his Sword-Pen at the four points of the compass, and at each wave a Humbug howled and fell. And
the loyal cheers of innumerable and unseen crowds went up to the firmament.

Suddenly there was a dead silence. Then the silver trumpet voice of the Emperor of the World was heard:

“ There was but one worthy to crown me. I have crowned myself. In remembrance of this immortal day, 1
bestow upon the world as immortal a boon. I present it with my

llolmitc.

AN