Punch (58.1870)

February 12, 1870.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. 61

OUT ACADEMY ARREARS.

ight heartily do we congratulate Mr.
Vicat Cole on his election as an As-
sociate of the Royal Academy — the
first landscape-painter, we believe, ad-
mitted to that honour for the last thirty
years.

Well—better late than never. The
Royal Academy still owes a heavy
debt to landscape-painting, bar. we are
glad it has " posted the coal " in pay-
ment of a first instalment. Let us
hope that, having begun to discharge
its arrears to Landscape Art, the
Academy will go on till they are en-
tirely paid off. Meantime, Fivat Yicki!

HEADS AND BODIES.

Dr. Pinel has been writing to prove
that guillotined heads may live three
hours after being severed. The Lancet
says this is all bosh. Besides the
deoxydisation of the blood, which must
cause unconsciousness in ninety se-
conds, there is the shock to the nervous
system.

Perhaps: and yet there are facts
that seem to support Dr. Plnel's
view. Ask the Conservatives whether
a party may not live months without a head; and ask Mr. Disraeli
whether the head of a party may not long survive the completest separa-
tion from the party P

ROME AND RAMSBOTHAM.

Dear Mr. Punch,

You will be rejoiced to hear that the Pope has exquisitely
advertised the Fenians. They are renounced, along with all Secret
Societies, against either the Church, or any regularly constipated
Government, whether Protestant or Roman Candlestick. The Free
Amazons abroad, you know, are tee-totally different from the same
bodies at home. With us they give feasts, and it's for the benefit of

. You should see the Babel Guards in their gorging dresses : by their
side our Beetles and Beefeaters are nowhere ; though I've heard that
our Gracious Suffering's—I mean Her Majesty's—Vixens-in-Waiting
have magnificent unicorns.

There are also Alberteers, whose costumes were designated by the
great Albert Dearer, or Mitchell Angelo, to whom I've eluded
before this, en parson, as the French say

We went to see the differing rides in the differing churches. All
Candlestick Priests all over the world say Mass ; but there are divers
cemeteries according to the various rides. The French, the English,
and German Roman Candlesticks are all the same, but the Pandeans,
Greeks, Arabian, and Ammonian Bishops, 4hough all Roman Candle-
sticks, have peculiarities. My nephew-in-law, who has been studying
for the Church, is quite one of the diddleantey, as the Italians say, in
these matters. He took me, and explained everything.

The Petrarch of the Pandeans was first: he has a beautiful beard,
and looks very vulnerable. The Ammonian Bishops wore their nitres,
studied with precious jems. Of coarse I knew they were saying
Mass, but beyond that I didn't know what they were saying. There
are bowings and ginny-fluctuations (why so called I don't know, for
they are most steadv people), and in some cases the flushing of a large
candlestick all lighted.

The weather is bad ; the murky is down to centipede, whatever that
means. When I write again, which will be in about two weeks' time,
I shall have a great deal more to tell you.

When Lent comes on, the Romans give up balls and parties—(the
English ball was a very pleasant one here; I had a lovely new satan
for it, looped up with bookcases at every affable point • and I had also
some real Balancing Lace, and this, with my two rubies and my large
admiral, exerted the envy and animation of all my come-parrots: but
to return)—they give up the pumps and vanities of this wicked world,
and take to fastenings and absence.

A Fastening day is when they only take one meal with meat, and
two collections without anything except a little dry bread; but a day
of absence means only raining from flesh meats, and living on nothing
but fish. The old pilgrims used to eat shell fish, and put the jalaps
in their hats, as you may recollect having seen in the pictures. Good-
bye for the present. The post waits for nobody: then why is it called

the post ? I am yours very truly,

Lavinia Ramsbotham, Junior.

THE CAT AND THE COUNCIL.

The Wearer of the Triple Hat
publicans and dmners ; but here they only give trouble, and are always Before his Council sends a Cat •

perspiring. King Figure a Manual is himself being potted against i Of eyes profane concealed from'view

by these unscrofulous rascals ; and if the French left Rome, it's my j jn envelope with mouth drawn to.

belief we should all be assessed in our beds, without asking with your \ Tue ]?aj;hers vow to keep therein '

leave or without your leave, as the prophet says I Puss, under pain of mortal sin ;

Talking of the Pope, you would like to know 1 dare say how he is Yet notwithstanding Papal gag,

affiliated to the office of Chief Pastime to the Roman Church. It is The' Cat [s \ei escape the Bag.

very simple. Any poor Monk or Fire, or regular or irregalar Priest, jg^ y What outsider interlopes

can be collected to the post. They are in this respect like the French jn c\ose Council of the Pope's ?

Shoulders, "every man Jack of whom," as a French genius said, Who's the jackdaw that thus assumes

" carries the pattens of a Field Marginal in his keepsake. I he Oarnayals Ecclesiastic peacock's plumes ?

all meet in secret cockloft, and each takes a pill, with which he gives Or is it possible there sits

his vote in an urn, just as they say the old Romans used to do with A. traitor in the camp, and " splits ? "

beans, which reminds me courteously enough, that tea wasn't properly : Detected, he'd be dealt with—how ?

unknown to the Heathens, or at all events coffee, as they used urns
and beans, with which I am told, as also with chickweed, coffee is

expensively--but I don't like to use this word; there are some

things better left unsaid; and, so far, I agree with the Riddle Com-
missionaires at home about the Lessons from the Topography • but
you know what I mean. However, this is only a learned inquisition,
and seems rather irreverent to the toothpicks of the present day in
Rome.

Of course the principal toothpick here is, whether the Pope is to be
declared Invaluable or not. Most lighting Candlesticks that I meet—
I mean by this the most belligerent of them—say that it will make no

Roasted alive ? No, not so now.
Enlarged, meanwhile the Cat goes free,
And how she jumps the world can see.

BRUTE FORCE AND BROKEN HEADS IN SOUTHWARD

The respective supporters of Sir Sydney Waterlow and George
Odgek, finding neither party can make any impression on the other
by argument, have taken to breaking each other's heads. We presume
, it is the only way they have of getting at each other's brains. Each
real deference, because the great doctor, if passed, will only refine ! accases the other of striking the first blow. We have no doubt

clearly where the seat is. As a Protestant, I don't correspond all this, " Kettle began it." But the difficalty is to say which is Pot and which
and don't portend to, as some folks do who know less, but say more. Kettle. In any case, each candidate has reason to be ashamed of his
The question, an eminent Elastic told me, is, whether the Pope is ■ " roughs;" and the sooner he disclaims them the better for his claims
invaluable ex catalogue ; that is, out of his seat or in it. One thing is 0n the constituency of Southwark.

certain, that, as a member of the English Church, whatever they say j --:- ---

here can't affect me, as we defer from them fondly and in loto.

What I said last week about my being wrong in the name of Aunt 1 Professional.
O'Nelly, as confident of the Pope, is not palpable after all, because I ] ^ Chimney-Sweep, being asked why he had not been married in
find, from Julia's reading to me, that, ages ago, there was a Consul church, replied, with some professional warmth, that he had been
at Niece. So why not an Aunt now as a confident of the Roman marrie(l as a matter of course, before his own register.

Pundit ? By the way, Aunt O'Nelly stood as spinster to the young ---

Princess of Austria, the other day in loo of the Pope. suggestion to john bull.

Lhere are many cemeteries m the churches whica f have not been _ , ,

able to subscribe, my space being dimity. i New Name for Tax-Collectors in 1870.—lhe LowE-ing nerd.

T