Punch (63.1872)

44

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

[August 3, 1872.

A CLOWN ON CHIONONS.

I takes care my hay to dry
Well afore my rick I raises ;

'Cause, if damp, 't'ool heat by-'m-by,
Ees, and bust out into blazes.

So, you gals, that stacks your hair
Fur above, in Men's opinions,

All you could by Natur' wear,
Mind you always airs your chignons.

For, like hay-ricks sometimes fires
Of theirselves, put moist together,

So them hair-ricks we admires
Also med, this here hot weather.

Though the heads o' them we love,
Flarun' up outright be n't many,

How them hair-ricks must, above,
Bake the brains below—if any !

BRAVERY AND BOOTY.

FROM THE SISTER ISLE

"Master's away from Home, Sir. Would you Please to leave your
Name ?"

" Faix, an' what should I re Lavin' me Name forr, bedad ! when he
Knows me quite well ? "

On Thursday last Mr. Stansfeld, the President of
the Local Oovernment Board, was to have distributed
the prizes gained by the lads of the Goliath training-
ship, lying off Grays, Essex; but, as the boys were
wanted to attend the school-drill in Hyde Park before
the Prince or Wales, the distribution of those prizes
had to be postponed. This postponement, however, will
not be for long; and let us hope that there will be no
greater delay in the distribution of prizes which the lads
of the Goliath may one day gain when they are men.
By that time, perhaps, a great deal more promptitude
will have come to be practised in giving both sailors
and soldiers their due winnings, so that the former will
then not be forced to wait for them so long as the latter
have now been for the Kirwee prize-money.

A Blot Hit.

Yes ; 'neath over-legislation,
Vernon Harcourt, groans this nation.
Statutes, to compel behaving
Prettily, are men enslaving.
Freedom is—defend its cause !—
No unnecessary laws.

lobbies were filled with Irish. For the Keogh debate was to come
on. The weather was fearfully hot. Do you want to know what
happened ? You must be content with brevity. Mr. Butt made a
worse speech, against Mr. Justice Keogh, than could have been
expected from an able advocate. He talked for an hour and a half.
Then the House went to dinner, and Mr. Mitchell Henry took up
the theme. Mr. Butt moved for a Committee of the whole House
to consider the Keogh judgment, and the complaints against it.
Mr. Pim moved that the language of the judgment was objection-
able, but that no interference was called for. Mr. Patrice Smyth
abused Mr. Justice Keogh, omitting his title, and catching a smart
rebuke from the Speaker.

The Attorney-General opposed Motion and Amendment, and
approved the prosecution of the Priests, who had mixed things sacred
and profane in such a manner as to bring discredit on the great
religious communion to which they belonged. It was not for the
House to criticise faults of taste and temper.

Mr. Henry James delivered a bold and elaborate defence of Mr.
Justice Keogh, vindicating his denunciations of the offenders, and
adding (you will remember that Mr. James is no Orange-man or
Tory, but an advanced Liberal)—

" It is not to technical prosecutions—it is not to the chances of a verdict
from an Irish jury—you must look to correct this evil. It is to public opinion
freely expressed that you must look for t&e correction. I know how weak the
voice of an individual is ; but the voice of Parliament is strong, and the voice
already heard to-night, with no uncertain sound, will re-echo through the
hreast of every man of every class, of every creed, of every party, and may
assist to teach this proud priesthood that within this realm no allegiance can
be allowed save to our Sovereign— {loud cheers)—and no obedience save to our
laws. {Protracted cheering.)"

There was more debate, and the House wished to have the affair
finished, but the Irishmen would not hear of this. Mr. Gladstone
and Mr. Disraeli both urged that the debate should be closed.
Adjournment was moved, and there were 350 against it, to 59 for

it. This vote really settled the question, and marked the opinion
of the British House of Commons on the attacks upon Mr. Justice
Keogh. But anybody can go on moving adjournments, and this
system being resorted to, Mr. Gladstone gave way, and the
resumption was fixed for the next Monday. To show you how hot the
night was, Mr. Punch adds that Mr. Fawcett, having moved an
Amendment on a legal Bill, was told by the Attorney-General
that the Amendment meant, either that Mr. Fawcett was a fool,
or he, Sir John Coleridge, was a knave.

" Our bloods obey the heavens."

Friday.—Fag-ends of legislation now " engross us wholly." The
Lords took up a good many, rejecting the worser sort.

In the Commons we had more Liquor Debate, and a wholesome
clause was passed for compelling an adulterating Publican to have his
sentence exposed at his own shop-door. This, and the remarks of
his jeering customers, will conduce to bring the evil Bung into a
happy frame of mind, and we pity his barmaid.

Debate on Improving the Law, but it was felt to be waste of time.
Mr. Gladstone made fun of Mr. Whalley, declaring him to be a
most wonderful man, who knew things that nobody else knew.

Saturday.—Yes, Madam, the poor Commons were driven to work
on Saturday, and they again took the Liquors Bill, and, we hope,
refreshed themselves with experiments on the subjects of their
discourse.

Tragedy in Lambeth.

Archbishop Cranmer died by fire.

To Ritualists if that's a joke,
Archbishop Tait will them inspire

With mirth if he should die by smoke.