Punch (65.1873)

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

39

36,

1873.j

MAKE YOUR MASTER’S INTERESTS YOUR OWN.

First Flunkey. “ Going to Wait here Long? ”

Second Ditto. “ No—we’re off to a Garden Party, on Business."

First Ditto. “ Which one is it?”

Second Ditto. “ Oh, the Eldest, as usual.”

First Ditto. “Any Good this Time, do you Think?”

Second Ditto. “ Well, I don’t Know. We’re a Trying Precious ’Ard.”

SLIPPING THROUGH SLIPPERS.

[Have you read Mr. Trollope’s “ Three Clerks ?” Then,
read it again.']

Yes, well I know your words are true,

I promised tins last dance to you,

The fact I can’t deny:

Yet do not deem a maiden false,

Nor think she ’d with another valse
While you are standing by.

Think not because my card I’ve lost
That something hath my temper crost,

Nor judge me a coquette ;

Fain would I in the giddy whirl
With you my partner madly twirl,

And all my grief forget.

But ah ! to-night my joys are o’er,

No more I tread the polished floor—■

(I thought you never frowned ?)

For {tvJasper) satin is not strong,

And, Henry, having danced too long,

My toes are on the ground.

PEBBLE POWDER AND PEPPER.

At the late Naval Inspection at Spithead, the yacht
Lynx, according to a letter in the newspapers from her
owner, had the misfortune to get accidentally in the way,
and close ahead of, a gunboat which was tiring salutes
in honour of the Shah. The salutes were fired with j
pebble powder, and ‘ ‘ the result may be more readily
imagined than described. The vessel was riddled as with
a charge of grape-shot, five persons severely wounded,
and one burnt with the explosion.” Of course. Not all
the pebbles of pebble powder, when a charge is fired,
explode; some, like some grains of common powder in
like case, remain entire, and are discharged as projectiles.
Consequently the gunboat astern of the Lynx, in salut-
ing the Shah with the report of pebble powder, also
saluted the unlucky Lynx with a shower of pebbles,, to
the effect above mentioned. Moral for yachtsmen—Give
the mouths of guns supposed to be firing blank cartridge
a wide berth, lest they should possibly salute you with
pebble powder, which is both powder and shot.

Problem eor Financiers.—To convert a Floating
Debt into a Sinking Fund.

thought of everything. And as Shakspeare says, “ He that is well
hanged in this world needs to fear no colours,” for the excellent good
reason that “ he shall see none to fear.” The late Delos has no cause
to dread the colour in which his difficulty with Halstead may be
represented to his late fellow-citizens. Possibly, as he is stated to
have had a “home,” it may now be discovered that he was a
martyr-soul, and that he died for having avenged some outrage on
his Lares and Penates. However, that will not materially alter
matters. We know nothing of the circumstances, and it is possible
that the Vigilants may have simply destroyed a ruffian who might
otherwise have escaped moyennant some of the merciful eccentricities
of the criminal law of the country.

For this Salem is not the place of which Melchizedec was King,
but is in Indiana, U.S., 40° N., 86° W.; Pop. 33,809 : and is inhabited
by people who speak the language of Shakspeare (more or less),
and who look down with Republican scorn upon the effete institu-
tions of a rotten old Monarchical country. Jeru—Salem ! Yes, Sir.
Yet, on the whole, considering that the most vigilant Yigilants,
being mortal, might confer immortality by mistake, we rather
prefer the Sworn Box and the Black Flag.

THE MUSIC OF INNOCENCE.

The life of Moscheles, lately published, contains an interesting
story about Mendelssohn and Queen Yictoria. The Composer
had paid the Queen a visit, during which he played several pieces
before Her Majesty and the Prince Consort. “ You have given
me,” said our Sovereign Lady, “ so much pleasure, now, what can I
do to give you pleasure ? ” Mendelssohn, “ himself the head of a
household, felt mightily interested in the Queen’s domestic arrange-
ments ; in short,” ventured to ask “that he might see the Royal
children in their Royal nurseries.” Whereupon—-

“ The Queen at once entered into the spirit of his appeal, and in her
most winning way conducted him herself through the nurseries, all the while
comparing notes with him on the homely subjects that had a special attraction
for both.”

The notes which the Queen compared with Mendelssohn on
the subject of the nursery were worth preserving.. It is known
that Her Majesty is well enough skilled in music to be quite
capable of comparing notes with a Master. Yery likely Mendels-
sohn did jot her notes down, and they still exist among his papers.
Had he lived, possibly he would have availed himself of them in
the composition of a symphony on a theme which has never yet
received musical treatment. That is, unless we. may regard as
savouring of harmonious effect the suggestive lines, which you
know, boys :—-

“ Continuo audit® voces, vagitus et ingens,

Infantumque animse flentes in limine primo.”

But, considering the place on whose threshold this concert was
heard by the pious AEneas, we may suppose that the mind’s ear of
the Poet imagined other sounds than those, of the nursery as they
would have been rendered by the Musician had he composed a
Nursery Symphony. According to Phrenology, the German Com-
poser’s “'Philoprogenitiveness” appears to have equalled his
“ Tune,” but much less of the former organ than of the latter is
evinced by the Latin Poet. A Nursery Symphony by Mendelssohn
would have breathed the sweetness of “ The Cradle Song.” But
perhaps Yirgil’s less pleasant conception of that sort of music is
the more natural. We can fancy such music, as conceived by
Yirgil, just now attending the Massacre of the Innocents.

Pawnbrokers’ “ Duplicates.”—Their Twins.