Punch: Punch (38.1860)

April 14, I860. \

PUNCH, CR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

L 47"

GEOLOGY AND ROMANCE.

In an abstract of a
lecture given by our
British Cuvier, at, the
Museum in Jermyn Street
1 lie ot her day, Professor
Owen is reported to have
said that:—

“ One of the large English
deer which is now extinct
was probably living on this
island at the time of Cjjsar’s
invasion, for he describes a
remarkable kind of stag,
with a single horn growing
from the centre of the fore-
head. Among the fossil
remains of extinct deer,
there are specimens of such
a one, for the two horns cross
one another in front, and
would have the appearance
of a single horn. Among the
extinct carnivora that waged
war with the abundant stocks
of ruminant creatures then
occupying this country, Pro-
fkssur Owen spoke of an
ancient real ' British lion,’ of
a British bear and hyena, the
evidences of whose destruc-
tiveness are distinctly visible
in the bone-caves of ttiis
country. ”

Thus Geology, as un-
folded by PROFESSOR
Owen, proves, beyond
controversy, that in for-
mer times the British
Lion did actually exist,
and that there really was
such an animal as the
British Unicorn. Now,
then, Geology will begin
to be regarded with in-
terest by many good
people who have hitherto

looked upon it as a melancholy material science, conducive to unbelieving conclusions. If it has
shown the British Lion to be no humbug, and the British Unicorn actually to have been at one
time comprised among the British fauna, it may lead to more discoveries demonstrative of the truths of
Heraldry. Wyverns and cockatrices, by the help of the geologist’s pickaxe, will turn out to have

been genuine reptiles, and other griffins
than plain ladies will be found to have
once existed in this island. Already,
as everybody knows, the exhumed
remains of the pterodactyle confirm
the nursery tales that commemorate
the Dragon of Wantley and other
dragons ; and doubtless, in good time,
the relics of a flying saurian, found
in chalk or oolite, with a spear-head
sticking in the ribs, will corroborate
the legend the destruction of those
monsters by the champions of Christen-
dom. St. George will be established
as having been a genuine British
worthy instead of a Cappadocian
rogue, and the traditionary enemy,
which he transfixed and triumphed
over, will have been proved to he the
Pterodactylus Longirostris, and not the
venerable St. Athanasius. Suffice it
us for the present to rest and joyfully
contemplate the geological revelation
of the reality of the Lion and the
Unicorn; and long may those formid-
able supporters of the Royal Arms
continue to sustain the shield of our
Sovereign Lady Victoria ! Long
live the Queen, and Professor
Owen !

Alarming Accident to the Pope.

His Holiness, in promenading
yesterday on the Corso, met with a sad
accident. His foot slipping in a puddle
of blood, he fell and broke his head.
The accident has been pronounced
to be a fracture of the temporal bone.

results of medical registration.

We believe we are justified in
stating, that the only difference which
the Medical Registration Act has made
to medical men, is that of their receiv-
ing about ten times as many begging
| letters as they used to get before it.

TWELVE SAGES OE HAMPSHIRE.

“ Mr. Punch, Sir,

“ Judging from certain remarks which you occasionally make
with respect—or rather with disrespect—to British Juries, I am afraid
that you entertain a not unmixed veneration for the institutions of
your country. I, therefore, with much pleasure, take the liberty of
acquainting you with a gratifying instance of sagacity and intelligence
on the part of twelve Englishmen in a box, which has just occurred
here at the Sessions. A man and his wife (second spouse) were
indicted for cruelty and neglect, of which the victim was a child of the
former by his first marriage. It was a case of “ injusta noverca,” and
a very bad one. The child had been shamefully maltreated and starved,
and left to suffer the worst consequences of soap and water withheld
from skin and hair, insomuch that the latter got into a state which is
indescribable. The law, as laid down by the Recorder, made the hus-
band alone answerable for the neglect, which, however, was owing to
his poverty; for, although his wife possessed a hundred pounds in the
Savings’ Bank, lie was not aware that the money belonged to himself.
Under these circumstances, he was advised to put in a technical plea
of guilty, and bound to appear and receive judgment when called upon;
whilst the jury were instructed by the Recorder to acquit the woman
of the neglect, for which, as the servant of her husband, she was not
legally responsible, though solely so in fact.

‘“But we vinds her guilty,’ said the Hampshire jury. ‘We
thinks ’twas she as was to blame vor’t all.’ I do not pretend to quote
these gentlemen’s language precisely; but this was its tenor and effect.

“‘But, Gentlemen, you cannot convict the wife of the neglect by
law. The law. Gentlemen, does not allow you,’ the Recorder told them.

“ ‘Bftt we thinks as how she is guilty,’ replied the jury.

“ ‘That may be. Gentlemen,’ said the Recorder; but you are bound
to deliver your verdict according to law.’

“ ‘But, we zays as how the truth ou’t is as she was the guilty one o’
the two.’

“Again the Recorder endeavoured to explain to them the necessity of
subordinating their verdict to the rule of legality; and the above
dialogue, with slight modifications, went on during some minutes ; the
jury persisting in declaring the woman guilty. At last the Recorder
said—‘Well, Gentlemen, then I shall take your verdict as declaring
her guilty of the fact, and enter that as a verdict of not guilty.’
Whereupon the foreman of this acute and truly intellectual jury asked
the following pertinent, and really profound question—

“‘Then, what’s the use o’ we ?’

“Talk of Blackstone's Commentaries ! What, in all those observations
on the laws of England, is there equal in point of wisdom, to this
comment of a British and a Hampshire jury on itself?

“ Ever yours,

“ Southampton, Hot-Cross Bun Bay, 1860.” “IIospes.”

“P.S. Eor the satisfaction of your benevolent readers, I am happy
to be able to state, that the woman was convicted on another indictment
for an assault on the child, and got three months, whilst her husband
was informed of his right to her hoard in the Savings’ Bank ; on which
she cried.”

A New Tap for the Masses.

In evidence lately given before the Committee on the Public
Institutions of the Metropolis, Mr. Ruskin declared that—

“There was an increasing thirst among the working classes for information and
improvement.”

Hear that, Mr. Gough. The United Kingdom Alliance will surely
allow that the necessity for a Maine Law is superseded by the in-
creasing thirst of the working classes for information and improve-
ment. Information is not ale, and improvement is not stout, though
the moral and the intellectual beverage combined may be said to con-
stitute a sort of half-and-half,, which, without fear of being contradicted
by the consumer, we welcome with a shout of “Ail hail! ”