Punch: Punch (38.1860)

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June 9, i860.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

231

MR. PUNCH A SPIRIT-RAPPER.

Mr. Punch begs to announce
that he has been converted
to the Spirit Happing Per-
suasion. And when He goes
in for a faith he goes the
entire believer, and not like
one of your half-hearted
Spiritualists, who very much
want to deceive themselves,
but are painfully conscious
that the experiments they
have witnessed are not only
not supernatural processes,
but are exceedingly clumsy
juggling. He has given him-
self up entirely to Spirit
Rappery, and from the mo-
ment, of his conversion set to
work calling up no end of
ghosts, until his indignant
neighbours sent in to know
whether he was holding a
meeting of the aggrieved
Metropolitan Postmen. And
he has been converted, totally and entirely, all for the small charge of
Sixpence. The Spiritual Magazine has done it all, and as that work
states that people are “bound to testify” what they think on the sub-
ject of Rappery, here goes for the particulars of Mr. Punch's apostacy
from common sense.

He published, the other day, and during his unconverted condition,
a picture illustrating the story of the Spirit Hand which was stated to
have appeared to the Emperor, Louis Napoleon. In that picture—
alas, that he should have tried to make fun of a miracle—the Hand
was assisting the Imperial Nose to form that derisive combination
of the nasal and the digital organizations which is vulgarly called
Taking a Sight. He did not know at that time how sensitive are the
Rappists to anything like ridicule, and that though they have no objec-
tion to be called blasphemous, or audacious, or wicked, they cannot
bear to be laughed at. Ridicule has been called the test of truth, but
it is a test which Rappery declines to undergo. Mr. Punch deeply
deplores that an unguarded sketch should have done so much mischief.
Now that he is himself a Medium, with lots of spirits waiting on every
landing in his house, and plenty more in the back garden, he compre-
hends that laughing at a ghost is excessively improper. The Spiritual
Magazine has awakened him to a sense of better things.

That remarkable work has devoted its first article for the present
month—about seven pages—to remonstrances with Mr. Punch upon
the picture which has been mentioned, and upon his habitual incre-
dulity upon the subject of Spiritualism. The writer of the article
resolved to bring Mr. Punch over to the faith, and effected it as follows.

It happened that a gentleman, a relative of a member of the firm from
whose establishment issues the sheet which embodies the spirit of
Punch, was lately invited to dine with another gentleman who lives in
Russell Square. Others were present, and after dinner certain things
alleged by the executant to be spiritual manifestations, took place.
Subsequently, Mr. Punch's picture of Taking a Spiritual Sight
appeared.

In the article in the Spiritual Magazine, the name of the gentleman
above alluded to as an invited guest, is mentioned, and in connection
with his visit reference is made to the picture in Punch. Here, of course,
comes in the miracle.

It is hardly necessary to say, that no gentleman could possibly so far
forget the usages of his order, the rights of hospitality, or the decencies
of life, as to make public use of any incidents of a private dinner-party.
It is perfectly certain that the gentleman above alluded to as connected
with Mr. Punch's publishers has not the remotest connection with the
production of Mr. Punch's paper, and equally certain that he never held
the slightest communication with the contributors to that publication
upon the subject of the performances in Russell Square. And it must
be equally clear that no other person who was present upon the occasion
in question could,have been guilty of such an outrage upon the proprieties
ot life as to furnish to the editor of the Spiritual Magazine any particulars
of what took place in the privacy of a gentleman’s chamber.

Therefore, by an exhaustive process, Mr. Punch has been brought to
the belief that inasmuch as the editor of the Spiritual Magazine could
not, have obtained his information from a Gentleman, he must have had
it from a Ghost. Now, one miracle is as convincing as a thousand, and
Mr. Punch, completely converted, throws up his best cocked hat for
Spiritualism, and goes in for ghosts. He believes ever} thing now,
believes all that is in the Spiritual Magazine, believes that, as stated in
the number before him (p. 243) :—

“ A hand did appear before the Emperor, the Empress, the Dlchess de Monte-
bello, and Mr. Home, and did take up a pen and write the word Napoleon

and is firmly persuaded, as also stated in the article (same page), that—

“ Autographs and other writings were obtained through the mediumship of the
Baron GoldenstubbE, consisting of a series of the names of kings, queens, and
princes of the royal houses of France, and other eminent persons. These were ob-
tained by placing blank pieces of paper on their tombs or statues."

Nay, he is ready to swear with-a correspondent of the Spiritual Maga-
zine (p. 286) that—

“ ‘A large hand grasped his little boy round the thigh,’ and that ‘another spirit
pinched the toe of a friend,’ and that another complaiued of his, the correspondent’s,
keeping a skull that had belonged to the spirit when on earth,”

and is ready to fight anybody (barring Tom Sayers and J. C. Heenan)
for the truth of the statement (p. 2S8) that—

“ Mr. Colchester, who had been communicating with a niece of his in the spirit
world, spoke of a peculiar sensation of the skin of bis chest, when on opening his
shirt bosom, the word Sarah, the niece’s name, was found upon the skiu in r-aised
letters, and occupied nine inches of space from right to left across the chest.”

Hooray for the Ghosts! Mr. Punch means to have them for contri-
butors to his paper, and in short, as aforesaid, to give himself up
entirely to Spirit Rapping. He has set several young Ghosts upon cuts
for his next Number, and has in type a most capital paper from a Fat
Spectre. More anon. Nor is he in the least afraid of being charged
with wickedness. He might, in his unconverted state, have bad some
foolish notions that tampering with solemn matters, for the sake of
folly or gain, might be objectionable, but the miracle above-mentioned
has convinced him that there is no fear of the Spirits of the Spiritual
Magazine being emissaries from the wrong world. For, the Spiritual
Editor’s Ghosts did—for a laudable purpose doubtless—a blackguard
action; they betrayed private confidence, whereas “ The Prince of
Darkness is a Gentleman.” But, perhaps, the action may be excused,
considering that the Spirit-business is an American invention, and so
is the habit of making public use of private confidences. No tune
brings up a Ghost so easily as Yankee Poodle.

LINES IN A SEASON OE SICKNESS.

BY A GOOD LIVER.

My stomach’s ever craving for enjoyment
And I supply it,

Because, from diet,

I do derive unspeakable enjoyment.

But then there comes the melancholy question,
Why do I suffer,

A poor old buffer.

So much from gout, and bile, and indigestion ?

Some people gorge their brains with erudition.
Learning and thinking:

Eating and drinking

So I’ve o’erworked my organs of nutrition.

AN OPERA OF THE EUTURE.

The events now proceeding in Sicily are serious enough; and it
seems a shame to regard the slightest circumstance relative to the
Sicilian struggle for liberty in a comic point of view; yet it is not easy
to help smiling on the perusal of the subjoined proclamation, which,
according to Foreign Intelligence, has been post.ed on the walls of
Palermo by the Royal Military Committee. Previously to quoting
that document, however, it is requisite to state, according to the same
authority, that—

“Demonstrations continually take place in Palermo, the mob shouting ‘ Viva
l’Italia!’ ‘ Viva Vittore Emmanue'e J' ‘ Viva Garibaldi ! ’”

The chorus of revolutionary outcries serves as an introduction to the
Royal notice, which follows in the obvious form of a recitative :—

“ La eitta, di Palermo e suo distretto sono da questo ir.omento in poi posti in
istato d’assedio.”

The fact that the city of Palermo and neighbourhood are placed in a
state of siege is no laughing matter, but the foregoing declaration to
that effect cannot be read by any frequenter of Her Majesty’s theatre
or the rival establishment in Covent Garden without suggesting to his
mind’s eye and ear the idea of its delivery on the stage by some Italian
vocalist in the character of a podesta, or his subordinate beadle. We
hope we shall one of these days have the pleasure of hearing Signor
Mario, or Signor Ronconi, or Signor Yialetti sing the very
passage in an opera founded on the present Sicilian insurrection, to be
called Garibaldi, and to prove as successful as the celebrated hippo-
dramatic entertainment of that name. In strict agreement with his-
torical fact, this piece, we trust, will terminate with a blaze of triumph,
in t.he midst of which Garibaldi, the conquering hero, will proclaim
Sicily annexed to the Italian kingdom, the blaze of triumph being, for
t he satisfaction of poetical justice, combined with an eruption of Mount
Etna, down whose crater a legion of hobgoblins will fiy away with
Bombalino.