DOI issue:
July 22, 1882
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.17753#0036
28
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
[July 22, 1882.
ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.
EXTRACTED EROM
THE DIARY OF TORY. M.P.
Monday, July 10. — Hear
of a little arrangement now in
progress. Some of our young
men have had. enough of
Gladstone, Habtington, and.
others who have enjoyed office
for many years. Their turn
now. Country hasn’t got on
so well under these elders as
to put out of Court motive for
substitution of Juniors.
“ They have tried it in the
Army,” young Lambton says,
gloomily. “When a man’s
been a Colonel for five years
he goes whether he’s good o^
bad. What’s sauce for th
Colonel should be sauce for the
Premier. If he won’t do as
we tell him, let him go. We ’ll
soon get another ; ” and the
sprig of nobility, not without
satisfaction, glances at himself
in the Peer-glass.
Fresh recruit to-night in
the person of Mr. Seely —
Seely, Junior, elected the
other day for Nottingham. Sat
in obscurity of back Benches
long enough. Comes out to-
night, and,—to the delirious
delight of Joseph Glllis,
who, since Mr. Healy is
virtuous, thought there were
to be no more cakes and ale,—
browbeats the Premier. This
thing likely to grow. Peter
has been sounded, but won’t
join in this unless he’s pro-
mised Chancellorship of the
Exchequer. That’s position
in the new Ministry Samuel-
son, Junior, has selected for
himself. Marriott has not
What will He do with It?”
settled yet whether he ’ll be Chancellor of the Exchequer, or start
with the Attorney-General-ship. Difference on this point may
retard expulsion of Gladstone, but as an eventuality that’s settled.
Youth has had enough of Age
and its shortcomings, and means
to take the tiller itself.
Business done. — Arrears Bill.
Autumn Session announced.
Tuesday Night. — News from
Alexandria. Arabi the blest is
now Arabi the bombarded. A
flow of excitement through the
House, though not much shouting.
Everyone admires the way in
which the affair was carried out
from the first. No blustering;
no shouting in St. James’s Hall.
No rattling of tumblers containing
Patriotic Gin - and - water, or
Brandy cold in Music - halls.
Arabi quietly told from the first
that he would not he allowed to
do as he liked in Egypt. Pre-
parations simultaneously made
for bringing him to order if he
persisted. Thought we were fun-
ning, finds we are firing.
Only Sir Wilfrid Lawson not
happy.
“ There is,” he said just now,
‘ ‘ a party in the House not satis-
fied.” But then Wilfrid wants
so much. If we were all teeto-
tallers, all members of the Peace
Society, and all privates in the Salvation Army, he would be sure
to find some other unpleasantness to force upon us.
Perhaps the most remarkable episode in the phenomena of the day
is the demoralisation of John
Bright. John has come out
a regular fire-eater. At eight
o’clock this evening, whilst
sitting suspended, was passing
through the Library. Came
upon him in one of the quiet
alcoves. Had his coat off, shirt-
sleeves turned up, and was
sparring away at a dummy
figure made up of his coat on
the back of a chair, and a red
silk handkerchief roughly re-
presenting a fez.
‘ ‘ What ’ s the matter, John,”
I asked.
“I’m having a round with
Arabi,” J. B. answered,
dancing round the dummy,
and making fearsome feints.
“Ha! would you?” and to
quote classical writing, “he
fetched him one on the conk.”
“ Thought you were a man
of peace, John. A sort of hit-
on-one-cheek-turn - the - other
young man.”
“ Yes,” he said, panting and
puffing-, for he’s getting a little
fleshy for this kind of exercise;
‘ ‘ but that was four years ago,
and a great deal has happened
since then.” Have since heard
that John was thinking of
applying for the post of Mili-
tary Governor of Alexandria,
when he suddenly changed his
mind, preferring the Society
of Friends to the Society
of Enemies. Yet “Bright
Pasha” would have looked
well in a fez.
Business done.—Arrears Bill
in Committee.
Cetewayo {as Napoleon).
want plenty of Elba-room.”
[History repeats itself:
Edition: Coloured Plates.]
“ Him
Small
Wednesday Afternoon.—Wilfrid Lawson shaking the Cap and
jingling the Bells over bombarded Alexandra. Goltrley found the
opportunity for him. Innocent ingenuous man, Gourdey. Has been
to sea on a yacht, and has, to the hitch of the trousers, all the sim-
plicity of the British seaman. The wily Wilfrid having his jokes
ready must needs get them off.
“ Didn’t like to move the adjournment himself as that would spoil
impromptu appearance. So got hold of Gourley, as the monkey got
hold of the cat to pull the chestnuts out of the fire for him.”
This is Onslow’s version. Not sure that Onslow is an impartial
witness against Wilfrid. Certainly it was curious to notice that
when in this quite unexpected manner Wilfrid rose to second the
motion for adjournment, he was providentially supplied wffh notes
of all his jokes. Went off famously. Conservatives cheered tremen-
dously. Gladstone a little unpleasantly scathing, and Gourley
complaining that he had had rather an uncomfortable time of it,
whilst Wilfrid had thoroughly enjoyed himself. “But,” as Sir
Charles Forster said, when he at last found his hat and observed
that someone had been sitting on it, “there’s no pleasure in life
without its alloy.”
Business done.—Arrears Bill.
Thursday Night.—Coolness sprung up between Right Hon. friends
on Opposition Bench. Stafford Northcote complains that Hicks-
Beach, Smith, and Gibson hustled him when he was about to ask
the Government why they had not done something else at Alexandria.
Besides Hicks-Beach in jumping up and trying to get before Smith
trod on his toe. Hicks-Beach very sorry, but says Smith shoved
him. Smith quite unconscious of having done so, but if so it was
Gibson. He was at the Table first. Gibson had been up three times
with his joke, well enough once, about the convicts, and had tried
to elbow him (W. H. S.) off. Then, he admits, he laid his hand on
Gibson’s arm. If in the struggle he cannoned against Hicks-Beach
very sorry. “ That’s all very well,” Stafford Northcote says with
quiet persistency; “ but the fact remains, my toe was trodden on.”
In the end, determined to turn on Gibson. What’s he to Egypt,
or Egypt to him, that he should jostle W. H. Smith at the table,
and cannon against Sir Michael Hicks-Beach, who trod on the toe
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
[July 22, 1882.
ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.
EXTRACTED EROM
THE DIARY OF TORY. M.P.
Monday, July 10. — Hear
of a little arrangement now in
progress. Some of our young
men have had. enough of
Gladstone, Habtington, and.
others who have enjoyed office
for many years. Their turn
now. Country hasn’t got on
so well under these elders as
to put out of Court motive for
substitution of Juniors.
“ They have tried it in the
Army,” young Lambton says,
gloomily. “When a man’s
been a Colonel for five years
he goes whether he’s good o^
bad. What’s sauce for th
Colonel should be sauce for the
Premier. If he won’t do as
we tell him, let him go. We ’ll
soon get another ; ” and the
sprig of nobility, not without
satisfaction, glances at himself
in the Peer-glass.
Fresh recruit to-night in
the person of Mr. Seely —
Seely, Junior, elected the
other day for Nottingham. Sat
in obscurity of back Benches
long enough. Comes out to-
night, and,—to the delirious
delight of Joseph Glllis,
who, since Mr. Healy is
virtuous, thought there were
to be no more cakes and ale,—
browbeats the Premier. This
thing likely to grow. Peter
has been sounded, but won’t
join in this unless he’s pro-
mised Chancellorship of the
Exchequer. That’s position
in the new Ministry Samuel-
son, Junior, has selected for
himself. Marriott has not
What will He do with It?”
settled yet whether he ’ll be Chancellor of the Exchequer, or start
with the Attorney-General-ship. Difference on this point may
retard expulsion of Gladstone, but as an eventuality that’s settled.
Youth has had enough of Age
and its shortcomings, and means
to take the tiller itself.
Business done. — Arrears Bill.
Autumn Session announced.
Tuesday Night. — News from
Alexandria. Arabi the blest is
now Arabi the bombarded. A
flow of excitement through the
House, though not much shouting.
Everyone admires the way in
which the affair was carried out
from the first. No blustering;
no shouting in St. James’s Hall.
No rattling of tumblers containing
Patriotic Gin - and - water, or
Brandy cold in Music - halls.
Arabi quietly told from the first
that he would not he allowed to
do as he liked in Egypt. Pre-
parations simultaneously made
for bringing him to order if he
persisted. Thought we were fun-
ning, finds we are firing.
Only Sir Wilfrid Lawson not
happy.
“ There is,” he said just now,
‘ ‘ a party in the House not satis-
fied.” But then Wilfrid wants
so much. If we were all teeto-
tallers, all members of the Peace
Society, and all privates in the Salvation Army, he would be sure
to find some other unpleasantness to force upon us.
Perhaps the most remarkable episode in the phenomena of the day
is the demoralisation of John
Bright. John has come out
a regular fire-eater. At eight
o’clock this evening, whilst
sitting suspended, was passing
through the Library. Came
upon him in one of the quiet
alcoves. Had his coat off, shirt-
sleeves turned up, and was
sparring away at a dummy
figure made up of his coat on
the back of a chair, and a red
silk handkerchief roughly re-
presenting a fez.
‘ ‘ What ’ s the matter, John,”
I asked.
“I’m having a round with
Arabi,” J. B. answered,
dancing round the dummy,
and making fearsome feints.
“Ha! would you?” and to
quote classical writing, “he
fetched him one on the conk.”
“ Thought you were a man
of peace, John. A sort of hit-
on-one-cheek-turn - the - other
young man.”
“ Yes,” he said, panting and
puffing-, for he’s getting a little
fleshy for this kind of exercise;
‘ ‘ but that was four years ago,
and a great deal has happened
since then.” Have since heard
that John was thinking of
applying for the post of Mili-
tary Governor of Alexandria,
when he suddenly changed his
mind, preferring the Society
of Friends to the Society
of Enemies. Yet “Bright
Pasha” would have looked
well in a fez.
Business done.—Arrears Bill
in Committee.
Cetewayo {as Napoleon).
want plenty of Elba-room.”
[History repeats itself:
Edition: Coloured Plates.]
“ Him
Small
Wednesday Afternoon.—Wilfrid Lawson shaking the Cap and
jingling the Bells over bombarded Alexandra. Goltrley found the
opportunity for him. Innocent ingenuous man, Gourdey. Has been
to sea on a yacht, and has, to the hitch of the trousers, all the sim-
plicity of the British seaman. The wily Wilfrid having his jokes
ready must needs get them off.
“ Didn’t like to move the adjournment himself as that would spoil
impromptu appearance. So got hold of Gourley, as the monkey got
hold of the cat to pull the chestnuts out of the fire for him.”
This is Onslow’s version. Not sure that Onslow is an impartial
witness against Wilfrid. Certainly it was curious to notice that
when in this quite unexpected manner Wilfrid rose to second the
motion for adjournment, he was providentially supplied wffh notes
of all his jokes. Went off famously. Conservatives cheered tremen-
dously. Gladstone a little unpleasantly scathing, and Gourley
complaining that he had had rather an uncomfortable time of it,
whilst Wilfrid had thoroughly enjoyed himself. “But,” as Sir
Charles Forster said, when he at last found his hat and observed
that someone had been sitting on it, “there’s no pleasure in life
without its alloy.”
Business done.—Arrears Bill.
Thursday Night.—Coolness sprung up between Right Hon. friends
on Opposition Bench. Stafford Northcote complains that Hicks-
Beach, Smith, and Gibson hustled him when he was about to ask
the Government why they had not done something else at Alexandria.
Besides Hicks-Beach in jumping up and trying to get before Smith
trod on his toe. Hicks-Beach very sorry, but says Smith shoved
him. Smith quite unconscious of having done so, but if so it was
Gibson. He was at the Table first. Gibson had been up three times
with his joke, well enough once, about the convicts, and had tried
to elbow him (W. H. S.) off. Then, he admits, he laid his hand on
Gibson’s arm. If in the struggle he cannoned against Hicks-Beach
very sorry. “ That’s all very well,” Stafford Northcote says with
quiet persistency; “ but the fact remains, my toe was trodden on.”
In the end, determined to turn on Gibson. What’s he to Egypt,
or Egypt to him, that he should jostle W. H. Smith at the table,
and cannon against Sir Michael Hicks-Beach, who trod on the toe