DOI Heft:
November 29, 1884
DOI Seite / Zitierlink:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.17757#0270
November 29, 1884.]
PUNCH, OP THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
263
ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.
EXTRACTED FROM
THE DIARY OF TOBY, M.P.
Salisbury’s Little Game at Skittles. He puts up his Friends to Speak on one Day, and Bowls them clean over, the next.
House of Commons, Monday, November 17.—O'Donnell turned
up to-day after a brief and regretted absence. Might have been
supposed after what has passed be would be in angry mood. On
the contrary, nothing could exceed bis quietness of manner, amount-
ing almost to depression. Speaker had suspended him. That was
personal inconvenience. But O’Donnell had no desire or intention
to press it. Still there was public duty to perform. In his poor
person Speaker had attacked liberty of speech and privilege of
Members. Accordingly, dropping a tear—I mean an eyeglass—of
sympathy with Peel, he gave notice on going into Committee of
Supply to call attention to his unconstitutional conduct. Only con-
solation for terrified Speaker is that there’s no more Supply needed
this Session, and therefore no Committee to go into.
Joseph Gillis greatly distinguished himself. Asked one question
already put and answered five times, and genially suggested with
respect to two officers in the Army, recently dead, that they had
embezzled moneys belonging to the regiment. Hayter, ordinarily
an unemotionable man who smiles his way through his official duties,
came down on the inoffensive Joey with hot indignation.
“ Base and groundless insinuations against dead men,” he cried,
amid approving cheers from all sides. ‘ ‘ I
Hayter thing of that kind.” Members roared
with cheers, and glared indignantly upon
Joey E., who grinned back upon them.
“Them two went off very well,” he said.
“ Must look up a couple more like ’em. Don’t
know though as I ’ll give up them two Pay-
masters. If they didn’t embezzle regimental
money, perhaps they murdered their mothers-
in-law. Put down notice to ask about that.”
Gladstone made statement of views on
Redistribution. Will do anything Lords
please, if they ’ll only pass Franchise Bill this
Session. Conservatives puzzled, not being quite
sure there’s anything in this bountiful-looking
concession. Radicals raging.
“ All is lost now,” says Labby, “all save
Northampton! ”
“ Don’t you think this is a little like sur-
render ? ” I asked the Chief, as we walked
together across Palace Yard. “Haven’t you
given them everything?”
“You young innocent!” he said. “We
haven’t given them anything at all, except an
excuse for halting Peers to desert the Markiss.
There’s a lot of words, hut they signify
nothing.”
_ Wonderful to see Gladstone’s face when
illumined by a wink. Reveals unsuspecting
possibilities of taking in even the Markiss.
Business done.—Penny added to Income-tax. “ Adequate
Tuesday.—Affecting scene in Lords to-night. Reconciliation the
order of the day. Granville and Lord Salisbury, yesterday stand-
ing with swords drawn, fell upon each othtr's neck, and. publicly
kissed. Balts bury says, tone of Granville’s speech perfect, emi-
nently calculated to bring about peace. Granville simpers, and
blushes, and says it might have that characteristic ; but, in all that
is good and great, it was so overshadowed by Salisbury’s general
conduct, and habitual observations that—that it’s of no consequence.
Kimberley completed general satisfaction by not making speech
on moving Second Reading of Franchise Bill. Pained expression
throughout crowded House when he came to the table. Milk of
human kindness, running sweet and fresh, began to curdle.
“ Sure to be on for half an hour—perhaps three-quarters,” said
the Markiss, covering his face with his hands, to hide the temporary
scowl.
But Kimberley did not speak two minutes. Reaction extraordi-
nary ; amiability formerly abounding redoubled. Salisbury brief,
Granville briefer.
“And the truce briefest,” growled Truthful James, who had
looked on at the moving scene from the steps of the Throne. “ What
did Salisbury mean by putting me up on
Monday week, to set everybody by the ears ? ”
he asked, glaring at me as if I were per-
sonally responsible. “Made a fool of me
and a tool of John Manners. I ’ve had enough
of this game, and will fling up politics.”
‘Yes, James,” said Gibson, with friendly
smile, “ after extension of County Franchise I
believe you will.”
Picturesque wrath of James finds parallel in
Radical camp. Labby going about furious,
says he wants to tear somebody’s hair ; can’t
spare his own.
“ We’d got the Lords in a corner,” he said.
“Never had such a chance in history before,
and won’t have such another for five or per-
haps ten years to come. Government should
have left Salisbury alone, to go his own way,
and wreck the Lords. Instead of that, they not
only help him out of the ditch, but provide
earriage-and-pair to take him back into place
of safety. If this is politics, I’m out of it.”
Gladstone serenely glad, and calmly confi-
dent. “ Loavther and Labby,” he said_, “ will
probably form a coalition. Sorry to displease
anybody, but can’t be helped. We shall get
the Franchise Bill. If anybody else thinks
he ’s got any small advantages, he’s welcome
to them. Ta-ta ! Got an order for the theatre.
‘ Evening dress indispensable.’ So must go
Assurance.” off, and get ready.”
PUNCH, OP THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
263
ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.
EXTRACTED FROM
THE DIARY OF TOBY, M.P.
Salisbury’s Little Game at Skittles. He puts up his Friends to Speak on one Day, and Bowls them clean over, the next.
House of Commons, Monday, November 17.—O'Donnell turned
up to-day after a brief and regretted absence. Might have been
supposed after what has passed be would be in angry mood. On
the contrary, nothing could exceed bis quietness of manner, amount-
ing almost to depression. Speaker had suspended him. That was
personal inconvenience. But O’Donnell had no desire or intention
to press it. Still there was public duty to perform. In his poor
person Speaker had attacked liberty of speech and privilege of
Members. Accordingly, dropping a tear—I mean an eyeglass—of
sympathy with Peel, he gave notice on going into Committee of
Supply to call attention to his unconstitutional conduct. Only con-
solation for terrified Speaker is that there’s no more Supply needed
this Session, and therefore no Committee to go into.
Joseph Gillis greatly distinguished himself. Asked one question
already put and answered five times, and genially suggested with
respect to two officers in the Army, recently dead, that they had
embezzled moneys belonging to the regiment. Hayter, ordinarily
an unemotionable man who smiles his way through his official duties,
came down on the inoffensive Joey with hot indignation.
“ Base and groundless insinuations against dead men,” he cried,
amid approving cheers from all sides. ‘ ‘ I
Hayter thing of that kind.” Members roared
with cheers, and glared indignantly upon
Joey E., who grinned back upon them.
“Them two went off very well,” he said.
“ Must look up a couple more like ’em. Don’t
know though as I ’ll give up them two Pay-
masters. If they didn’t embezzle regimental
money, perhaps they murdered their mothers-
in-law. Put down notice to ask about that.”
Gladstone made statement of views on
Redistribution. Will do anything Lords
please, if they ’ll only pass Franchise Bill this
Session. Conservatives puzzled, not being quite
sure there’s anything in this bountiful-looking
concession. Radicals raging.
“ All is lost now,” says Labby, “all save
Northampton! ”
“ Don’t you think this is a little like sur-
render ? ” I asked the Chief, as we walked
together across Palace Yard. “Haven’t you
given them everything?”
“You young innocent!” he said. “We
haven’t given them anything at all, except an
excuse for halting Peers to desert the Markiss.
There’s a lot of words, hut they signify
nothing.”
_ Wonderful to see Gladstone’s face when
illumined by a wink. Reveals unsuspecting
possibilities of taking in even the Markiss.
Business done.—Penny added to Income-tax. “ Adequate
Tuesday.—Affecting scene in Lords to-night. Reconciliation the
order of the day. Granville and Lord Salisbury, yesterday stand-
ing with swords drawn, fell upon each othtr's neck, and. publicly
kissed. Balts bury says, tone of Granville’s speech perfect, emi-
nently calculated to bring about peace. Granville simpers, and
blushes, and says it might have that characteristic ; but, in all that
is good and great, it was so overshadowed by Salisbury’s general
conduct, and habitual observations that—that it’s of no consequence.
Kimberley completed general satisfaction by not making speech
on moving Second Reading of Franchise Bill. Pained expression
throughout crowded House when he came to the table. Milk of
human kindness, running sweet and fresh, began to curdle.
“ Sure to be on for half an hour—perhaps three-quarters,” said
the Markiss, covering his face with his hands, to hide the temporary
scowl.
But Kimberley did not speak two minutes. Reaction extraordi-
nary ; amiability formerly abounding redoubled. Salisbury brief,
Granville briefer.
“And the truce briefest,” growled Truthful James, who had
looked on at the moving scene from the steps of the Throne. “ What
did Salisbury mean by putting me up on
Monday week, to set everybody by the ears ? ”
he asked, glaring at me as if I were per-
sonally responsible. “Made a fool of me
and a tool of John Manners. I ’ve had enough
of this game, and will fling up politics.”
‘Yes, James,” said Gibson, with friendly
smile, “ after extension of County Franchise I
believe you will.”
Picturesque wrath of James finds parallel in
Radical camp. Labby going about furious,
says he wants to tear somebody’s hair ; can’t
spare his own.
“ We’d got the Lords in a corner,” he said.
“Never had such a chance in history before,
and won’t have such another for five or per-
haps ten years to come. Government should
have left Salisbury alone, to go his own way,
and wreck the Lords. Instead of that, they not
only help him out of the ditch, but provide
earriage-and-pair to take him back into place
of safety. If this is politics, I’m out of it.”
Gladstone serenely glad, and calmly confi-
dent. “ Loavther and Labby,” he said_, “ will
probably form a coalition. Sorry to displease
anybody, but can’t be helped. We shall get
the Franchise Bill. If anybody else thinks
he ’s got any small advantages, he’s welcome
to them. Ta-ta ! Got an order for the theatre.
‘ Evening dress indispensable.’ So must go
Assurance.” off, and get ready.”