Punch (68.1875)

February 20, 1875.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

85

NURSERY RHYMES FOR THE TIMES.

ally was a pretty girl,

Fanny was her sister;

Sally read all night and day,
Fanny sighed and kissed her.

Sally won some school degrees,
FannY won a lover :

Sally soundly rated her,

And thought herself above her.

Fanny had a happy home,

And urged that plea only;
Sally she was learned—and
Also she was lonely.

IX.

aVLI ^-nc'I,I-E Y? ilky went one day

All the way to Westminster, there to play—

To play a little game called Li-ti-gation,
Heeding skill to play it well and close ap-
pli-cation.

Silly Willie Wilky had never play’d
before,

And when he had played one game he swore
he’d play no more.

m.

How does my Lady’s garden grow?

Six gardeners keep it in order, I trow.

Into it oft does my Lady go ?

Unless she has parties there—0 dear, no!

Her flowers are cut for her, then, as they
blow ?

Her gardeners would not allow that, you
know.

“ Much money my Lady must surely bestow

Without much return?” Well, she seems
to do so.

But Fashion’s book-keeping is Fashion’s
affair;

Only Fashion her gains with her losses can
square.

OUR REPRESENTATIVE MAN.

On a Visit to the Egyptian Hall.

Sir,

Totr, perhaps, would be able to explain, satisfactorily to
yourself at all events, how most of those things which astonish
ordinary folk are done. I confess to being one of the ordinary folk
—not of course in appearance, or I would not dare to represent you,
Sir, at places of public entertainment, where directly I appear,
decorated with your well-known orders, an audible whisper goes
round the room of, “There he is! that’s him!" and similar
indicative phrases now in use wherever the English language is
spoken in its native purity. Certain then that you had not visited
that home of all the Sphinxes, the Egyptian Hall, where under
one roof there are three distinct entertainments, from the jewels of
the first water-colour in the Dudley Gallery (observe my playful
allusion to “Dudley ” and “ Jewels”—ah! rich and rare were the
gems she, poor lady, didn't wear on that eventful evening), to the
second floor of mystery shared by the Marvellous Dr. Lynn and
the Twin Thaumaturgi, Messrs. Maskelyne and Cooke. Sir, as
long as these latter gentry inhabit the Egyptian Hall, “ Wonders
will never cease! ”

And, mind you, thanks be to them for disposing of a heap of
stuff and nonsense, and wicked imposture, too, which had been of
late years brought before the curious and too credulous public
under the name of Spiritualism.

There’s as much Spiritualism in the way in which Messrs.
Maskelyne and Cooke manage their puzzling cabinet and the
sealed and corded box, as ever there was in any of those tricks which
were, professedly, spiritualistic. The two magicians are most
anxious to court inquiry. For my part, in the interest of the public
and as specially representing you, Sir, I ascended the platform and
rapped the cabinet inside and out with my umbrella (representing
yours, only better), examined the box most carefully, assisted in both
experiments by a scientific gentleman of uncommon acumen, who pro-
fessed himself perfectly satisfied of one thing—viz., that the decep-
tion in the construction of the box and cabinet was so perfect, as
completely to defy the most prying scrutiny. Bowing to the
audience, who heartily applauded our zeal in their behalf, but did
not throw anything at us, we (the scientific friend and myself)
gracefully quited the stage and resumed our seats. Some igno-

ramuses considered us accomplices. We heard a few ill-conditioned
people, as we were leaving, remark, “Them’s two of’em, reg’lar
confederates. Bless you, they ’re paid for it, and come every day in
different disguises. Lor’ I know 'em by sight." We smiled super-
ciliously and passed out.

I am forgetting Psycho. Psycho is the figure of a small and]
melancholy Turk, with lack-lustre eyes, and hands having a
peculiarly unnatural appearance, even for an automaton,
about the nails. He is seated cross-legged on a box, and
he has small boxes near him. On the whole, he rather resembles
a Turkish gentleman who, having determined upon travelling,
had begun to pack up, and having suddenly tired of the occupa-
tion had sat down on a trunk, and rested his left arm on a
couple of small boxes. However, Psycho is an independent gentle-
man, for he and his trunk are raised above the floor on a glass
pedestal, qnite transparent, and he most certainly appears to have
no connection with anybody either on, or off, the stage. He
does a sum in arithmetic ; he takes a hand at whist, and. plays (I
was told this, not being a whist-player myself) a. very fair game.
Some clever people say there’s a dwarf concealed inside. If so, the
dwarf himself would be a fortune in a separate entertainment;
but, again, if so, Heaven help that unfortunate dwarf! Where the
poor creature can possibly conceal himself is, to my mind, a greater
wonder than that Psycho should be worked by electricity, as was, I
believe (for I dare not say I know) the plain clock face of trans-
parent glass shown in Mr. Robin’s entertainment. Between the
first and second parts a Mr. Fritz Renhard shows what he can do
with his face, three lights, mediums, and strong reflectors. He
makes shadow do duty for substance, and whiskers and moustaches
appear on his face in less time than I take to write these words.
And to see him change colour!—from white to black, and from black
to such a beautiful brown as the Shah might be proud of. Mr.
Maskelyne commences the entertainment with one of the prettiest
dining-room-table tricks I’ve ever seen; viz., making six plates
dance, all at the same time. It would be a capital thing for a young
amateur just home from school to try with his father’s best dinner
service. If damage is done, everyone must have a beginning, and
look what a fortune may come out of even plate-spinning !

Let visitors take my advice, and lay their time out so as to spend a
profitable and amusing afternoon at the Egyptian Hall,, thus: —
Begin with the Dudley Gallery in good daylight. It is a well