Punch: Punch (76.1879)

100

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

[March 8, 1879.

the withdrawal of the Bill, as no settlement of what must soon he
settled, and could only be settled in one way ; and Mr. Cross, after
a candid enumeration of all the reasons against the Bill, declared
his intention of voting for it! It might do some good, and really
he did not see that it need do any harm. Mr. Monk made
thoroughly ashamed of himself by such support, pleaded in vain for
leave to withdraw his Bill, but had to sit and see it thrown out by
160 to 129—and serve him right. But Ash Wednesday is a day of
humiliation.

Thursday {Lords).—Lord Carnarvon called attention to some
silliness on a serious subject lately vented at the Epidemiological
Society by a Gentleman connected with a Public Department,
about the desirableness of having one or two cases of the plague
here, in order that they might form the subject of scientific observa-
tion, and his hope that the Government would keep themselves clear
of "all the nonsense of quarantine." The President of the Council
very properly disclaimed all the nonsense of this Gentleman, and
gave him a well-merited rap over the knuckles to boot. Plague is
too serious a subject for flippant doctrinarianism.

{Commons.)—After an hour over miscellaneous matters, including an
attempt by Dr. Kenealy to lug in the British Bart, on the shoulders
of William Habron (exonerated by Peace's dying confession from
the murder of a Manchester policeman), and an assurance to the
Major from the Skcretart at War that six Guardsmen to three
Linesmen was quite a fair division between Guards and Line of the
vacancies in the 24th Regiment, Air. Mitchell-Henry brought on
his great question of privilege against the Times for accusing him,
and other Irish Members, of "malign intentions," of "lying in
ambush," and issuing thence for purposes of "obstruction," in the
ineffectual discusbion of Sir Stafford's Resolutions last Monday
night.

Punch will not rush in where the Times has not feared to tread,
and will only say that any Member more incapable of obstruction
than Mr. Mitchell-Henry, and, indeed, all the Home-Rulers—
Messrs. Biggar and Parnell, O'Donnell and O'Connor Power, in
particular—he has never seen in the House of Commons, and

Hampden and Lord Hardinge. Lord Bury, and the Commander-
in-Chief don't see their way to weighing such incomponderables as
brawn, beef, and brains together. Lord Card well is very glad.
Competitive Examination is bad enough as it is, without having
" athletic sports " brought within its grasp. But bad as Competitive
Examination may be, there is one thing worse, and that is, appoint-
ment by favour without it.

(Commons.)—Upon as weighty a matter as can engage the National
wisdom. Do we know whether india is prosperous or bankrupt—or as
ill or well governed as, granted English rule, she can be? If we don't
know,—and Professor Pawcett says ice don't, though he does,—that
she is bankrupt and may thank our mis-government for it—ought
not Parliament at once to set about acquiring the knowledge ? Cer-
tainly, say Mr. Laing, Mr. Newdegate, Sir G. Campbell, Mr.
Bright, and Mr. O'Donnell. " Not just now," says Mr. Grant-
Duff. "Not the least use, bless you," says Mr. Stanhope, with
ex-ofhcio cockiness. " Things couldn't be better—at least wouldn't
be better—for all the inquiry in the world."

Sir Stafford, in his usual half-and-half style, takes his seat be-
tween the two stools of Mr. Grant-Duff and Mr. Stanhope. Punch
shrugs his shoulders, and listens to the whisperings of the Indian
wind, which blows nobody any good. So the House votes no inquiry
by 139 to 100, preferring to wait till inquiry is forced upon it by
the hard hand of disaster.

WINTER EXHIBITION.

shoes." ' 1 WImJi'1- rUi 0 \1 M I , - Jajt Steen. A wondrous

In Supply,— Oliver asking for more. Besides £2,751,000 to cover
Exchequer Bonds falling due, Sir Stafford Northcote wants a
Million and a half at once for the Zulu War,—to say nothing, for
the present, of the little bills of the future.

As "coming events cast their shadow's before," Sir Stafford pre-
pares us for a black Budget, by confessing to a deficit of a Million—
in his own pleasant way of putting it; but which is really, as Mr.
Guilders made out but too clearly, a deficit of more than six millions.
We have been stopping the gap by Exchequer Bills and Bonds, till,
floating and unf unded debt together, we have more than Twenty-four
Millions of our State paper " out," which will have to be "met"
sooner or later. Sir Stafford is as learned in the distinction be-
tween varieties of debt as the cook, no doubt, was in varieties of
sauce, when the geese stupidly ventured to express a preference on
the subject. But if Britannia will be lighted on the way where
glory waits her, she has no right to grumble at the cost of the
candles. Let grovelling "unimperial" administrations look to the
candle-ends.

Major Nolan still calls for breech-loading big guns; and the
Authorities seem disposed to listen to him, since the 38-tonner burst
under double-loading, which with a breech-loader would have been
impossible.

A good deal of rumbling and grumbling, ominous of impending
eruption of the anti-Zulu-war-volcano. The Office, Sir Bartle
Frere, and Lord Chelmsford, may all look out for squalls. Nay,
has not the fiery O'Shaughnessy declared that, at need, he will
himself impeach, if not impale, the High Commissioner on his own
hook. Better, at least, wait to hear what the High Commissioner
and Commander-in-Chief have to say for themselves.

Colonel Stanley brought in his Bill for Amendment and Consoli-
dation of Military Law. If the House approve this, as seems likely,
Sir W. Harcourt and Common Sense both standing sponsors for the
Bill, we shall henceforth give legal force to our Military Code by an
annual Act. This will leave the House as complete control of the
Standing Army as it has now, besides substituting a well-digested
and reasonable body of Military Law for a confused and often
unreasonable one. The Bill seems to deserve favour, and to be
likely to find it. It does not betray any signs of the threatened
Beaconsfieldian design to slip the Army's head out of the Parlia-
mentary collar.

Friday {Lords). — Lord Fortescue wants thews and sinews
weighed m " with brains, in the Army Examinations. So do Lord

ee last Visit to the Exhi-
bition of the Works of
the Old Masters, ivhich
closes on the second
Saturday in March.

No. 52. Portrait of
Frances, Lady Sondes.
Sir Joshua 'Reynolds,

that he onlv wishes that every evening of the Session was as \ Wj0//ip^!^ "2* ffimi P R A

MfMlTCHELL^henry!8* ^ ^ ^ ^ Sir joshua reynolds pi]

With this. Punchywithdraws himself gratefully under the; wings W^^^^^^'f^M I . A portrait of a Minx, it is.
of the Skibbereen Eagle, an organ ot Erin which can make Mr. 7t%w'i^ ''t\>-i\/ffl \ \ ' o • sy

Shaw, as he confessed, and even greater than he, "tremble in his j /M m r ]No-c,54' brace.

picture. My only regret
is, that the face of the lout
saying grace should indi-
cate dissatisfaction with
the ham, which has already
seen some service. It
reminds me of Leech's
picture, ''' For what we are
going to receive,' &c.—
What! cold mutton again!"
The position of No. 54 is
appropriately close to the
Refreshment Room, where

The index-finger like a truncheon
Points the shortest way to luncheon.

No. 56. The Eve of the Deluge. Jan Brueghel. Summer's
evening, somewhere, or summer, where,—Summer's town by sunset,
perhaps. Every sort of animal, including a good Flanders dray-
horse, out enjoying themselves in the grounds, I suppose, of Noah's
villa, which is visible in the distance, represented as an eligible
residence of the period, standing "in its own park-like surround-
ings." Noah and family probably inside, packing up. I suppose
he put a pair of everything in his portmanteau: socks, boots, hand-
kerchiefs,—but how about hats ? Refer to Colenso, who now
represents the Unorthodox Cocker. The Ark, like the British
Fleet in the Critic, " is out of sight," probably at its moorings.

No. 60. Portrait of a Man, said to be General Velasquez. Peter
Paul Rubens. If a portrait of the General, there's no doubt about
his being a man.

No. 68. Portrait of a Dutch Gentleman. Bartholomew van
dee Helst. Certainly, a portrait of a gentleman, but, at the same
time, what a picture of a ruff J

No. 80. Ruth and Boaz. gerbranlt van der Eeckhout. This
is the work of an artist Avho was able to eke out a livelihood by
painting. Boaz was a merciful man because he wasn't Ruthless.
{Vide Comic Catechism.)

No. 83. Portrait of Cornelia Remoens. Abraham Janssens.
Without the portrait, it may be truly said, in the words of the poet,

" Collar and cuff
Are quite enough."

No. 85. Head of a Girl. Jean Baptiste Grel/ze. As poor old