Punch (34.1858)

PREFACE.

[June 26, 1858.

maimed, in this manner, another horse called Liberty, who had then been killed by a French quack
veterinarian. In ten minutes Tiara was dancing on his hind legs, to the music of Luther's Hymn.

A handsome creature, of Spanish blood, was then introduced. She was named The Innocent.
She had fondling and wheedling ways, but suddenly lashed out and bit venomously, and never was so
dangerous as when apparently in the best humour. She came of a bad stock, but ill-training had been
the poor thing's worst enemy. Very brief time passed, and she was caracoling round the ring, delighted
with a popular air called the Pronunciamento.

Why a Turkish horse, named Abdul, was brought to Mr. Punch, he could not tell, the animal
being in an enfeebled condition, and incapable of doing much harm. The point seemed to be to give
him activity, but the only thing that excited him was the attempt to take away any of his gay trappings.
There was talk of entering him for the Enlightenment Stakes, but he evidently could not live the pace.

Then came Bomba, an obstinate brute, exceedingly malicious, whose forte was getting anybody into
a corner, keeping him there, and occasionally kicking him in the face or stomach. The stern, yet mild
Dompteur stood no nonsense from this auimal, and in a quarter of an hour he amiably beat time to a
hymn of Watt's, and it was clear that he would see no enemy in a Park.

A rather young horse from Vienna was next subjected to the process. He also was ill-bred rather
than positively vicious, and he became frightened at the commonest objects, when nothing allayed him
but the sight of soldiers' uniforms. He was gradually familiarised, by the Tamer, with the sight of the
obnoxious articles, and speedily allowed a Newspaper to be freely flung at him.

Some Russians then came with a horse called Alexander. " I had a good deal of trouble with his
Sire/' said Mr. P., " but this seems altogether a horse of another colour." And so it proved, Alexander
rather shying at the sound of a gun, but being apparently pleased with that of the railroad. " A free
goer," said Mr. Punch, "and I hope to see him at Ascot."

Lastly came a Yankee horse called President Sly Boots. The moment he entered, he deliberately
winked at Mr. Punch. The latter went gently up to him, and, being a master of the American language,
addressed him as follows :—" 1 calklatc, old boss, as you ain't in want of no teaching from me. Lookin'
reound after Cruiser, air you? Never mind about cruisers. That's all square, yes, Sir-ee. And you
knows it all-fired well, old boss. Yew git out ! " added Mr. Punch, with one of Mrs. Barney Williams's
most brilliant squalls.

President Sly Boots set up such an uncommon hearty horse-laugh, that Mr. Punch awoke, and
determined to prefix his dream to his

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