DOI Heft:
January 25, 1862
DOI Seite / Zitierlink: https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16869#0048
Cabby. “ What, take the lot, Sir? Well, 1 ain’t no objeckshuns, personally, myself, but Sir Richard Mayne mightn't like me carrying ’Natomys
through the Street.”
PROGRESS IN CASE OF PEACE.
A Prospect unpleasant lias passed for the present,
Shall we, ceasing war-preparations,
So costly already, return to our steady,
Pacific, and useful vocations ?
We ’ve plenty of work and must do it,
And somehow contrive to get through it,
To hold a position in our Exhibition
Since we have asked all nations to it.
Our leisure regaining, all London to draining
We now must devote our attention,
And the Thames’s embankment, ’mongst wonders to rank meant,
A scheme of such vast comprehension!
The purified River, a new age
Will use for its drink and its brewage,
’Twill run no more muddy; and then we’ve to study
The utilisation of sewage.
Poured out in our waters, the fish that which slaughters.
With plenty will crown all our acres;
We’ll economise it, and deodorise it,
To be of its produce partakers.
Then Beauty shall touch the piano,
__ And warble in dulcet soprano,
" Row rich in home-treasure, exceeding all measure.
No longer we ’ll roam for our guano.”
There’s work for next Session; by means of compression.
Of speech it may vanquish its labours;
Make new laws, old cobble, if out of a squabble
We manage to keep with our neighbours.
Oh, let not their turbulent courses
Force us to re-marshal our forces !
Arid pile shot and shell up, but may we develop
In peace our internal resources !
ACCIDENT MAKES ADVERTISEMENTS ACQUAINTED
WITH STRANGE COMPANIONS.
We borrow the following advice from the advertising columns of a
morning contemporary, who has had the good fortune of winning not
less proudly than ourselves the bad opinion of the Morning Star:—
p AZETTE OF BANKRUPTCY, No. 25, 2d.
gUNDAY READING.
Monthly Parts, only ‘6d.
We long to read the beautifully abusive article that is almost sure to
appear in our Yankee friend, the Star, vehemently denouncing the
Times for profanely recommending, as indicated above, the Gazette of
Bankruptcy for “ Sunday Reading ”—more especially as there is such
a charming paper published on that same day as the Dial. Please, be
particular in asking for the Sunday edition of that paper. Moreover,
we confess we agree for once with our invaluable denunciator, the Star,
in doubting whether the Gazette of Bankruptcy is the best style of
reading for Sunday, or indeed for any other day, inasmuch as such a
publication must necessarily consist of nothing but column after column
of “ broken English.”_
Very Sharp.
What have the smaller wits been about to miss this :—
“ On Friday last the wife of a working Cutler, residing at 37, John's Ten-ace,
Hackney Road, was safely delivered of three sons.”
A Cutler, mind. Well—three sons ? No—three blades—lta! ha!
ha ! ha! ha! ha! ha! Why, the joke would make a young man’s
fortune in the suburbs. Three blades ! Ha! ha! ha ! ha! ha! ha !
Who says there’s no wit nowadays ? Ha! ha! ha! &c. &c. &c.
New American Work.—Just Published, Dr. Darwin on tne
j Extinction of Specie, dedicated to the Secretary of the Treasury and
I tiie Bankers of New York.
through the Street.”
PROGRESS IN CASE OF PEACE.
A Prospect unpleasant lias passed for the present,
Shall we, ceasing war-preparations,
So costly already, return to our steady,
Pacific, and useful vocations ?
We ’ve plenty of work and must do it,
And somehow contrive to get through it,
To hold a position in our Exhibition
Since we have asked all nations to it.
Our leisure regaining, all London to draining
We now must devote our attention,
And the Thames’s embankment, ’mongst wonders to rank meant,
A scheme of such vast comprehension!
The purified River, a new age
Will use for its drink and its brewage,
’Twill run no more muddy; and then we’ve to study
The utilisation of sewage.
Poured out in our waters, the fish that which slaughters.
With plenty will crown all our acres;
We’ll economise it, and deodorise it,
To be of its produce partakers.
Then Beauty shall touch the piano,
__ And warble in dulcet soprano,
" Row rich in home-treasure, exceeding all measure.
No longer we ’ll roam for our guano.”
There’s work for next Session; by means of compression.
Of speech it may vanquish its labours;
Make new laws, old cobble, if out of a squabble
We manage to keep with our neighbours.
Oh, let not their turbulent courses
Force us to re-marshal our forces !
Arid pile shot and shell up, but may we develop
In peace our internal resources !
ACCIDENT MAKES ADVERTISEMENTS ACQUAINTED
WITH STRANGE COMPANIONS.
We borrow the following advice from the advertising columns of a
morning contemporary, who has had the good fortune of winning not
less proudly than ourselves the bad opinion of the Morning Star:—
p AZETTE OF BANKRUPTCY, No. 25, 2d.
gUNDAY READING.
Monthly Parts, only ‘6d.
We long to read the beautifully abusive article that is almost sure to
appear in our Yankee friend, the Star, vehemently denouncing the
Times for profanely recommending, as indicated above, the Gazette of
Bankruptcy for “ Sunday Reading ”—more especially as there is such
a charming paper published on that same day as the Dial. Please, be
particular in asking for the Sunday edition of that paper. Moreover,
we confess we agree for once with our invaluable denunciator, the Star,
in doubting whether the Gazette of Bankruptcy is the best style of
reading for Sunday, or indeed for any other day, inasmuch as such a
publication must necessarily consist of nothing but column after column
of “ broken English.”_
Very Sharp.
What have the smaller wits been about to miss this :—
“ On Friday last the wife of a working Cutler, residing at 37, John's Ten-ace,
Hackney Road, was safely delivered of three sons.”
A Cutler, mind. Well—three sons ? No—three blades—lta! ha!
ha ! ha! ha! ha! ha! Why, the joke would make a young man’s
fortune in the suburbs. Three blades ! Ha! ha! ha ! ha! ha! ha !
Who says there’s no wit nowadays ? Ha! ha! ha! &c. &c. &c.
New American Work.—Just Published, Dr. Darwin on tne
j Extinction of Specie, dedicated to the Secretary of the Treasury and
I tiie Bankers of New York.