Punch (62.1872)

160

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

[April 20, 1872.

PUNCH'S ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT

ondat, April 8.—
Mr. DiskaELI ap-
peared, fresh from
his great Lanca-
shire triumph, and
not looking at all
like a wearied Lion,
hut rather as one
prepared to roar
again at the short-
est notice. How-
ever, to do him
justice, he never
assumes the leonine
without provoca-
tion — he hath a
temper, Sirs, which
is much to he
envied.

ously inquired whe
ther sis counsel
had heen retained
to prosecute the
man Castro, now
in Newgate. The
Attorney - Gene-
ral said that the

enormous mass of evidence to be dealt with required a strong legal
staff—not, however, that there was any difficulty in the case itself,
which was most simple, "the ' Claim' being an insult to the common-
sense of mankind," Yes, but that sense is not so common, espe-
cially among the commoner sort, Castro's chief patrons and backers.

Evidently Lord Enfield is not let into all secrets He stated
that there was no hope of any relaxation in the French Passport
System. On a later night his chiefs in both Houses proclaimed that
it was to be immediately and entirely abolished.

Me. Dodson, Chairman of Committees, announced his retirement,
and he was duly complimented by the two Leaders of party.

When Me. Dodson publishes a third volume of the enchanting
adventures of Miss Alice, of Wonderland and Looking-glassland,
he shall be duly complimented by the Great Leader of all,
Mr. Punch. The latter cannot as yet recover from his admiration
of the marvellous poem, " Jabberwocky," and of his own miracu-
lous adaptation thereof. His only regret is that his amber embalms
a bloated blow-fly.

Mr. Bonham-Carter, who has been for many years the M.P. for
Winchester, was made the new Chairman of Committees, and it is
to be hoped that though our Carter will usually guide his team by
ejaculations, he will not forget that he carries a whip for use on fit
occasions.

"On hackney stands,
"We reverence the coachman that cries ' Gee !'
And spares the lash." {Rejected Addresses.)

but if horses will not go, or will jib, the resources of science must
be employed.

We then got upon the Ballot Bill, and the obstructives made the
discussion rather amusing. Several divisions were taken, and there
was a pleasing fight on the question whether the polls should be
kept open after dark, for the convenience of our artisan friends.
Mr. Forster thought that disturbances would be the result, but
had no objection to open the poll till sunset, provided that happened
before eight o'clock. Imagine Sol being the arbiter of elections.
There was also a struggle to insert a clause for detecting personation,
but Ministers were afraid that this would interfere with the absolute
secresy in which it is imagined that Britons desire to involve their
voting.

What do you say to this, Mr. Forstee ? Suppose that electors
who are indignant at the idea of its being supposed that they are
afraid to declare their votes should set up a sort of Register office,
on election day, and should proceed thence from the poll-booth, to
set down their suffrage for publication among their fellow-citizens.
Will this be illegal ?

" What, hang a man for speaking Out ?
Then farewell, British Freedom." (Cowper.)

Tuesday.—The Lords met again, and were entertained with a dis-
cussion on the case of some young officers who, having been already
gazetted as Ensigns and Lieutenants, are now to be sent to Sand-
hurst for education. It was explained that they were so gazetted,
with notice that they would have to be subject to new rules, then in
preparation. But, on the whole, these young Swells have a griev-

ance, and Punch hopes that their military ardour is not to be
checked by any harshness.

Lather an odd debate in the Commons, touching the right of
everybody to be heard against a certain Metropolitan Improvement
Bill, the House having decided that the Board of Works should
alone be heard. But it was fairly contended that the Board is not
the representative of everybody, but only of Vestrymen, who are
certainly "not everybody." Ministers had to split. Mr. Atrton
opposed the larger proposal, and Mr. Gladstone supported it, which
as M.P. for Greenwich, he was almost bound to do. It was, however,
rejected by a good majority.

We had a debate raised by Me. Fowler, on the subject of Entail.
He wihhes to make land much more easy of transfer. An unlucky
reference to some cottages which are in a disgraceful state, gave
Mr. Disraeli the means of making a good point. He was able to
show that the dwellings were not the property of a Tory landlord,
but of a Liberal tradesman. Mr. Gladstone thought that the
subject was^ not ripe for legislation, and asked Mr. Fowlee to
withdraw his motion, to which Mr. Fowler replied that if Mr.
Gladstone could not make up his mind how to vote, he could easily
walk out of the House. (There is a new manual of politeness just
published.) The snare of the fowler was escaped on division,
Mr. Neville J 103 to 81.
Grenville curi- Wednesday.—Me. G. Onslow, one of the distinguished treasurers
of the Castro Fund, presented a petition from some people at and
about Tichborne, declaring that they believed in the Claimant, and
begging that he might be defended at the public expense. Mr.
Aether Guest presented a somewha.t similar petition from Poole,
but next day wrote to the Standard to say that he had merely dis-
charged a Member's duty, and had refused to ask that the petition
might be read, as that would have implied his approbation of it.

Other proceedings were dull, except that the Sunday Trading
Bill was opposed by Me. Peter Tayloe in a really clever and
effective speech, in which he deprecated, very properly, all needless
interference with the sale of the small necessaries and comforts of
the needy. The Bill was rejected by 69 to 40. The smallness of
the aggregate number, when a question involving the interests of
lowly folk was at stake, shall be charitably explained by the
suggestion that Solvent gentlemen felt ashamed to be meddling with
the ways of the poor, who have bother enough, without Parlia-
mentary addition.

Thursday.—M.TZ. John Bright re-appeared in the House, after his
long and much-regretted absence. He came in at prayer-time, so
there could be no demonstration of welcome, or he would have been
hailed with hearty cheers. Mr. Punch hereby cheers him lustily.
At any time our John would have been joyfullyreceived, but there is
just now special reason for shaking his hand hugely. For we this
week read a capital letter (a "patriotic" letter, as the Conservative
Standard j ustly calls it) to Me. Cyrus Field, in which Mr. Beight
sets the conduct of the Americans "in order before their eyes,"
denounces the "folly" of the indirect demands, and declares that
England will never go into Court upon a claim which, if given
against her, she would never accept. " Has the Presidential Elec-
tion anything to do with this matter P " asks Me. Beight, demurely.
Ha! ha! Does he remember th: big bellows and the Yankee
"Claimant" in Mr. Punch's masterly Cartoon?

There is a Railway Bill, for enabling a company to cut through
the most beautiful part of Sutton Park, a favourite haunt of the
people of Birmingham. A slight deviation would answer all
engineering purposes, and save the scenery. But Mr. Punch need
hardly say that the Railway interest was much too strong to listen
to any sentimental appeal. However, the Birmingham people
mean to ask the aid of the House of Lords, and here will be a capital
opportunity for the owners of Parks to show that they understand
the feelings of the lovers of Parks.

Mr. Ateton indulged in a scoff at the Clerk of the Weather,
remarking that as he had actually favoured us with two fine days
in succession, tan might soon be put down in the Park, unless the
official in question changed his mind. It is pleasing to see that
Me. Ayeton's reverent habit never abandons him, be the topic what
it may.

Young Gentlemen of the Foreign Office, who is responsible for
this blunder ? In the Correspondence about the Treaty with France,
the words "sur lest," meaning "in ballast," have been translated
as if the second word had been " V Est" and "coming from the
East" had been meant. " Nous sayons ! Say un mull de la pre-
miere magnitude, ay tout le gras sera dans le feu see set sort de chose
ay de oiler sur."

Friday.— In both Houses there was explanation of the state of the
American negotiations. We lodge a Counter-Case, but we avoid
any argument on the indirect claims, and we reserve all rights, and
also liberty to recede. If no further blunder has been made, these
precautions would appear to be sufficient.

Sir Wilfrid Lawson moved a resolution to the effect that
England should declare that she would never fight in anybody's
quarrel but her own, in any circumstances whatsoever. After a good