Punch (62.1872)

April 27, 1872.]

PUNCH, OR, THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

169

aroused a good deal of wrath. Both the Bentincks, for
PUNCHS ESbtNCE OP PARLIAMENT. whom Punch does not profess habitual adoration, spoke

manfully against it, as did Lord E. Cecil and Mr.
Beresford Hope. But the Government carried this bv
203 to 152, majority 51. y

" ' But hope not thou,' said Turnus, ' when I strike,
To shun thy fate, our force is not alike.' "

Turnus means VEKKrOBT Habcottrt—respice finem. Mr.
West tried to get six months, instead of two years, pre-
scribed, but he failed. However, Mr. Forster consented
to insert a provision that the act must be fraudulent.

More strife and struggle, and some pleasing person-
alities, Mr. J. Hardy informing Mr. Samtjelson that he
got into the House by undue influence-however, Mr.
Bonh am-Carter caused that expression to be "took
back."

But now begin to take notice, like the little babies.
Mr. Leatham moved that no voter after marking his
vote on the Ballot-paper should wilfully display it, so
as to make known how he voted. The Conservatives
opposed this (coupled as it was with the penalty of
being sent to prison), and so did some Liberals, especially
Mr. Fawcett, who declared that the instincts of
England would never let a man be put into gaol merely
for performing a public duty openly and honestly.
But Government adopted the tyrannical proposal, and
after a bungled division another was taken, and the
numbers were 167 to 166, the majority for Mr. V. Har-
cotjrt and against Mr. Gladstone One. Whereat there
onday, April 15.—Appeal (from the French appeler, were huge Opposition cheers. Respice finem, we repeat.
Latin appello) was the topic of the evening, in the

Lords. Faithful to his custom of introducing a Tuesday—We told you that Earl Nelson, some time
quotation, in or out of season, to a non-reading age, a2°> sa10- tnat he expected every man to take his seat in
Mr. Punch has glanced into the drawers of his memory for a line in which the , church. We waited his explanation. He has a Bill,
word occurs. Such a line instantly presents itself, of course, and that it has | which the Archbishop said was aimed at a real griev-
no kind of bearing on, or connection with, the matter in hand is an advantage. ance- „The object is to preserve sundry free seats in a

Then, cloaking hate with fiery zeal,
Proud Lorne thus answered the Appeal,
' Thou com'st, 0 holy man!' "

Lord of the Isles.

state of freedom. A propos of anything you like, what
an odd way the foul fiend had of tempting Poor Tom,
in King Lear, by "putting halters in his pew." If a
gentleman in church were suddenly seized with a desire
to hang himself (and perhaps Shakspeare knew what
kind of dementing sermons can be preached) the place is

Refer to the passage, and you will find that it leads, as passages should, to
something worth reaching. This is the splendidly dramatic situation in which ' most unsuitable for such a purpose. Even a "beadle
the priest, who was about to curse The Bruce, is over-mastered by an inspira- would have almost sense enough to prevent its being
tion, and blesses him in a noble and prophetic strain. But the business in the carried out.

Lords ? Ah, true. Well, Lord Hatherley proposes to construct a new Grand Lord Kimberley, the Colonial Secretary, introduced
Court of Appeal, and to do away with the Appellate Jurisdiction of the House , the new Licensing Bill, in the House of Lords. Ban-
of Lords. Retired but still able lawyers are to form the principal members of dersnatch, who has no reverence, supposes that his
the Court, but any Lord who may rightfully be called Learned is to be qualified. Lordship was selected to deal ■with the spirit-shops be-
The plan has to be carefully considered, and when their Lordships discuss it cause his motto is " A-gin-court." Let Bandersnatch
in detail, Mr. Punch will cast his illuminating beams upon the topic. i be anathema. It was right to give the Lords something

Mr. Ayrton has decreed that the old houses in Abingdon Street, close to the to do. Of the Bill, of which we had heard much, we
Palace of Westminster, shall be pulled down within the month. Thanks, JEdile, 1 shall not say much, yet. The points be these :—
but they ought to have fallen long ago. Do you recollect a quotation so Existing rights not to be disturbed,
miraculously introduced by Lord Macadlay at a dinner-party given just after As regards new licences, those granted by County
some edifices had tumbled down in Tottenham Court Road, and at which party Magistrates not to be valid unless confirmed by

an American lady, whose theological views were not over-orthodox, put them j
forward over-fluently ?

" Here falling houses thunder on your head,
And there a female Atheist talks you dead."

It is alleged that sundry officers in the Ninth Lancers have made things
unpleasant for a gentleman who joined on the strength of having passed a
brilliant examination, and not by purchase. Also that the Commander-in-
Chief has given it to the offenders rather hot. The papers are to be moved for
—let us wait for them. Mr. Punch rather likes Spangled Officers, if they
do not shake their spangles too proudly, and he is ever loth to be harsh with
them, but discipline must be maintained.

" And Britons rarely swerve
From law, however stern, which tends their force to nerve."

This night began anew the Ballot Battles, which ere the week was spent
resulted in an extraordinary cropper for the Cabinet. The case is this. The
authors of the Ballot Bill, in their great zeal and tenderness for the unfortunate
persons who are afraid or ashamed to vote publicly, are tremendously hard upon
the majority of Her Majesty's faithful Elector-subjects, who have also been
accustomed so to vote, and who detest secresy. It was proposed to inflict dire
and terrible punishment upon anybody who should raise the Isis veil of the
Ballot— (A propos of Isis, what says Lord Lytton ?

" From vulgar eyes a veil the Isis screens,
And fools on fools still ask what Hamlet means.")

and to-night there came on the clause for giving two years' imprisonment, with
or without hard labour, to any person who should irregularly take out a Ballot-
paper. This creation of a new offence, and visiting it with about eight times
as much vengeance as is poured on a ruffian who batters his wife to pieces,

Vol. 62.

a Special Committee of Quarter Sessions.
In boroughs where there are not more than nine
Justices, they are to have jurisdiction; when
more than nine, they are to appoint a Special
Committee, but its acts are to be confirmed by
the whole body and by the Home Secretary.
Various appeals are provided.

London Public-houses to be shut from midnight till

VII. in the morning.
In towns with fewer than 10,000 people, from A.
to VII.

Over that population, from XL to VII.
On Sundays, no houses to open till I. London
houses to shut at XI. ; in the second case at IX.,
and in the third at X.
Well, you know, that won't do. We mean, parti-
cularly, the Hours regulation. Mr. Punch knows and
cares nothing about anybody's wants and comforts but
his own, and if everybody would mind his own business,
everybody's business would be minded. Mr. Punch's is
to sav that the Opera is very often not over till XII., or
a little later (if Meyerbeer's learned sock be on), and
he likes to hear the end, and if he is not to be allowed
to go round to the Albion for a silver flagon of beer,—

" One drop, tLe last, to cool him for the weed,"

he will become an International Republican Co-operative
Democratic Communist. More of this anon. The Secona
Reading is for the second of May.