Punch (65.1873)

august 23, 1873.] PUNCH, OK THE LONDON CHARIVAKI.

79

SPEAK FOR YOURSELF ! ”

Jack (who has a neat Leg and Foot). “ I sat, Tom, don’t you think Knick-
erbockers WOULD BE A VERY SENSIBLE SORT OF COSTUME FOR THE KIND OF
Trip you and I propose ? ”

Tom (who is without these Advantages). “ Yes—but not for Two Old Fogies
LIKE YOU AND ME ! ”

MARRIAGES OE THE EUTUEE.

It seems to be thought necessary to give fuller details every year of the
marriages which are of importance enough to he announced in the public prints;
so much so that eight or ten lines are now hardly sufficient for all the par-
ticulars which would have been compressed into two or three a few years ago.
It is not difficult to foresee that these interesting epitomes of personal history
have by no means reached their limit, and that, before long, paragraphs of
eighteen or twenty lines will he required to satisfy the demands of family pride
and self-importance. Announcements of marriages will lengthen and grow,
until they reach something like the following dimensions

“On Thursday, the 5th instant,—being the anniversary of the birthday of
the Bride, and also of the Bridegroom’s maternal grandmother, Mrs. Wyndham
Wigmore, relietof Alfred Wyndham Wigmore, Esq., Q.C. (formerly Solicitor-
General for the Spice Islands), and last surviving grand-daughter of the Bight
Honourable Lord Baxderfeeld, G.C.B., G.C.H., of Lychendale Court, Hum-
berland, Ambassador Extraordinary to the Court of Bangkok on the Coronation
of His Majesty the King of Siam—at the parish church of High Boxbury,
Bissex, by the Yenerable the Archdeacon of the Sandwich Islands, assisted
by the Bev. Walter T. Tipper, Bector of High Boxbury, Prebendary of
Porchester, Bural Dean, and Domestic Chaplain to the Most Noble the Marquis
of Bryanston, K.G., K.T., with the Bev. Francis Horatio Addiscombe, M.A.,
Fellow, Tutor, and Senior Bursar of No Souls College, Oxford, brother-in-law
of the bridegroom, and the Bev. S. Tremordyn Clymer, B.C.L., Private
Tutor to the Bight Honourable Miscount Falkingham, and second cousin
of the bride, as auxiliaries ; Hugh Alexander Maxwell Erringham, Esq.,
B.A., Fellow of No Souls College, Barrister-at-Law, of the Outer Temple, and
64, Coronation Gardens, Hyde Park, London, second son of Sir Fleetwood
Fortescue Erringham, Baronet, of Gislingworth Park, Hurdleshire, to
Mildred Mabel (Cosy), youngest daughter of Jonathan Huxterby, Esq., of
Goldenbanks, Spindleshire, and Loud House, Grand Duchess Terrace, W., J.P.,
D.L., and formerly High Sheriff of Spindleshire. In the unavoidable absence
of her father, from a sudden attack of gout, the bride was given away by
her uncle, Cornelius Huxterby, Esq., of Sunnyholme, Twickenham, and
Capercailzie Lodge, Grampiansheugh, N.B. She was attended by twenty-

four bridesmaids, the principal being her bosom friend
and schoolfellow, the Honourable Patricia Mary Mul-
ligan, seventh daughter of the Lord O’Muxligan, of
Castle Blarney, Ireland. The bridegroom’s best man
was Lieutenant-Colonel Sydney Spencer Byngmore,
of the Boyal Arquebusiers (Grim Borderers). The bride
and bridegroom are passing the customary interval of
seclusion at Summersfield, Hurdleshire, the picturesque
seat of the bridegroom’s great aunt, Henrietta Lady
Binbrooke. They will receive visitors at their residence
in Coronation Gardens on the 15th, 16th, and 17th of next
month.”

P.S.—We commend a sensible improvement in a recent
announcement of a marriage. The principal officiating
minister only^ was mentioned, with this addition —
“assisted by four other clergymen.” Wedding couples
designate, please copy.

THE SUEERAGE EOR TEIE SWAINS.

(Hawfinch sings.)

By latest accounts from head-quarters,

The Ministers’ good to promote,

’Tis meant to enfranchise the carters,

And gie every ploughman a vote;

Extendun the sulfridge that furder.

“ Bevolution ! ” some grumblers cries out,

And hollers “ High Treason ” and “ Murder i ”

“ Gie’n votes to the clodpole and lout! ”

I ben’t in no sitch constarnation
About enfranchizun our clowns,

And grantun’ um emancipation

As wide as the breezy South Downs.

No need to fly into a panic ;

No fear of increasun’ mob rule :

Clodhopper compare with mechanic.

Which on ’urn’s most fur from a fool F

Suppose they be both fools together,

As their words and their acts both denotes,
Why then the plain question is whether
Both bain’t alike fit to ha’ votes ?

The greatest o’ pains has been taken
They shall vote as can’t rade, write, nor spell;
Then why not allow a chawhacon
To tender a fool’s vote as well ?

But no man agrees with his brother,

Whose life is a different lot,

One fool, though as gurt as another,

His own sart o’ folly ha’ got.

So one’s vote the t’other’s opposes,

And that’s the defence of the plan
Of sufferidge by “ countun o’ noses ” ;

O’ Chelsea to quoat the Wise Man.

The more, under that there condition,

The better the noses, for me,

I thinks I could zign a petition
For Earlswood to vote wi’ the Free.

And then, if so be we admitted
Asylums, we med as well schools,

To be all the moor benefitted
By havin’ fools vote agen fools.

Leastways, as the nateral purtectors,

And gardjuns o’ them that we loves,

We ought to make all them electors,

Our darluns, our ducks, and our doves.

To poll we shall soon dance so gaily,

Together, both faymales and men ;

Bill Gladstone bids ’gainst Ben Disraeli;

And Bill med be outbid by Ben.

ii Much. Dare in It.”

Rob Roy.

The Inverness Courier, remarking upon Mr. Bruce’s
taking the title of Lord Aberdare, suggests that Lord
Neverdare might have been as apposite. ’Tis neat.
But, anyhow, his Lordship went to the last Mansion
House banquet to speak, though well aware that he had
nothing to say, and the learned Editor of the Courier
knows (better than most men) who wrote—

“ Judicious drank, and greatly daring, dined.”