DOI issue:
January 26, 1861
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16867#0050
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [January 26, 1861,
FOREIGN TRAPS FOR ENGLISH FLATS.
Fools and flats read the newspapers as well as other people. Else we should not see so
often such advertisements as this
A Large FORTUNE may be realised for ONE POUND only.—For particulars apply to
Mr.-, Banker, of Frankfort-on-the-Maine, or letters addressed to him, London.
Now, every one except the fools and flats aforesaid knows well enough what sort of
trap this lure is meant to bait. But because only the fools and flats are likely to be caught
by it, we do not think we ought to tolerate its presence in our press. Lotteries are for-
bidden by the English law, and the law, to be consistent, should put a stop to the announce-
ment of them. Until this be done, however, we hold the editors of newspapers responsible
for all the gambling that ensues, in consequence of the advertisements to fools which they
admit. We have as a rule, we own, small sympathy with our flats; but we must say that
we hate to see them duped by foreign knaves, and losing their good English money in bad
continental company. It is in the penny newspapers that the traps are mostly set; and as
perhaps with the proprietors of the penny press the argumentum ad pocketum is the most
powerful to use, we would hint that every sovereign which in quest of a “ large fortune ”
finds its way to Frankfort might have bought two hundred and forty copies of the newspaper
in which the bait that lured it thither was imprudently displayed. If therefore editors have
any wish to swell their circulation they will not cede insertion to the snares of foreign
“ bankers.” in whose “promises to pay” no Englishman should trust.
A CHANCE FOR A NEW GODIVA.
Who has not read the idyll sweet
Of our own Alfred Tennyson,
How fair Godiva, ages since,
Earned Coventry’s best benison:
When to repeal stern Godwin’s tax
Imposed upon the borough,
Unclothed, save with her chastity,
She rode the city thorough?
The Poet tells us how the cry
Of starving babes and mothers
Struck deep in that sweet lady’s heart,
Wherein all men were brothers.
How the grim Earl, among his dogs,
Received her soft petition,
And little deemed Godiva’s ruth
Would brook his hard condition.
Who calls not up, the while he reads.
That picture, bright and tender—
Those rippled ringlets to the knee
Showered in their golden splendour—
The naked loveliness that steals
From pillar unto pillar—
The silence of those empty streets
That her steed’s tread makes stiller ?
Again the plaint of hungry babe.
The wail of desp’rate mother,
The awful cry of agony
Not e’en strong men can smother.
More loudly sound in Coventry
Than in that olden day,
When grim Earl Godwin laid the tax
His good dame took away 1
A grimmer Lord than Godwin lays
His hard hand on the town.
A heavier weight than Godwin’s tax,
Presses the people down.
Gaunt Hunger lords it o’er the place
With Plague, his henchman true;
The looms are still—shut up the mill—
There is no work to do!
Oh, where is the Godiva now
This grim Lord to assuage?
Needs not that she ride naked
As in the ruder age.
Needs not with rippled ringlets’ veil,
tier snowy limbs she hide;
With ribbons decked from head to heel,
Behoves her but to ride.
So saying to our English dames
“Go all and do like me,
To set the idle loom to work,
The silent shuttle free.
E’en as of old Godiva rode,
Clad in her golden hair,
Ride, English ladies, gaily decked
In ribbons’ rainbow-wear.
“ And as Godiva’s name throughout
Our England is renowned,
So shall your names with blessing
In Coventry be crowned.
Naked she went, and not ashamed.
For ruth her heart did move;
So in your ribbons men shall read
Not vanity, but love.”
Something Picked up at a Publisher’s
Sale Dinner.
First Bookseller. Do you know that young
Grub Street, who has tried his hand at every-
thing, and imitated everybody in turns, has
changed his hand-writing ? "He now writes
backwards.
Second Bookseller. Ah! I suppose he’s trying
to write like Crabbe ?
FOREIGN TRAPS FOR ENGLISH FLATS.
Fools and flats read the newspapers as well as other people. Else we should not see so
often such advertisements as this
A Large FORTUNE may be realised for ONE POUND only.—For particulars apply to
Mr.-, Banker, of Frankfort-on-the-Maine, or letters addressed to him, London.
Now, every one except the fools and flats aforesaid knows well enough what sort of
trap this lure is meant to bait. But because only the fools and flats are likely to be caught
by it, we do not think we ought to tolerate its presence in our press. Lotteries are for-
bidden by the English law, and the law, to be consistent, should put a stop to the announce-
ment of them. Until this be done, however, we hold the editors of newspapers responsible
for all the gambling that ensues, in consequence of the advertisements to fools which they
admit. We have as a rule, we own, small sympathy with our flats; but we must say that
we hate to see them duped by foreign knaves, and losing their good English money in bad
continental company. It is in the penny newspapers that the traps are mostly set; and as
perhaps with the proprietors of the penny press the argumentum ad pocketum is the most
powerful to use, we would hint that every sovereign which in quest of a “ large fortune ”
finds its way to Frankfort might have bought two hundred and forty copies of the newspaper
in which the bait that lured it thither was imprudently displayed. If therefore editors have
any wish to swell their circulation they will not cede insertion to the snares of foreign
“ bankers.” in whose “promises to pay” no Englishman should trust.
A CHANCE FOR A NEW GODIVA.
Who has not read the idyll sweet
Of our own Alfred Tennyson,
How fair Godiva, ages since,
Earned Coventry’s best benison:
When to repeal stern Godwin’s tax
Imposed upon the borough,
Unclothed, save with her chastity,
She rode the city thorough?
The Poet tells us how the cry
Of starving babes and mothers
Struck deep in that sweet lady’s heart,
Wherein all men were brothers.
How the grim Earl, among his dogs,
Received her soft petition,
And little deemed Godiva’s ruth
Would brook his hard condition.
Who calls not up, the while he reads.
That picture, bright and tender—
Those rippled ringlets to the knee
Showered in their golden splendour—
The naked loveliness that steals
From pillar unto pillar—
The silence of those empty streets
That her steed’s tread makes stiller ?
Again the plaint of hungry babe.
The wail of desp’rate mother,
The awful cry of agony
Not e’en strong men can smother.
More loudly sound in Coventry
Than in that olden day,
When grim Earl Godwin laid the tax
His good dame took away 1
A grimmer Lord than Godwin lays
His hard hand on the town.
A heavier weight than Godwin’s tax,
Presses the people down.
Gaunt Hunger lords it o’er the place
With Plague, his henchman true;
The looms are still—shut up the mill—
There is no work to do!
Oh, where is the Godiva now
This grim Lord to assuage?
Needs not that she ride naked
As in the ruder age.
Needs not with rippled ringlets’ veil,
tier snowy limbs she hide;
With ribbons decked from head to heel,
Behoves her but to ride.
So saying to our English dames
“Go all and do like me,
To set the idle loom to work,
The silent shuttle free.
E’en as of old Godiva rode,
Clad in her golden hair,
Ride, English ladies, gaily decked
In ribbons’ rainbow-wear.
“ And as Godiva’s name throughout
Our England is renowned,
So shall your names with blessing
In Coventry be crowned.
Naked she went, and not ashamed.
For ruth her heart did move;
So in your ribbons men shall read
Not vanity, but love.”
Something Picked up at a Publisher’s
Sale Dinner.
First Bookseller. Do you know that young
Grub Street, who has tried his hand at every-
thing, and imitated everybody in turns, has
changed his hand-writing ? "He now writes
backwards.
Second Bookseller. Ah! I suppose he’s trying
to write like Crabbe ?