DOI issue:
May 4, 1861
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16867#0187
May 4 4861.1
PUNCH, OR 1
LONDON CHARIVARI.
179
Sunday-School Teacher. Oh, Johnny, I’m Shocked to see you Playing with
SHOULD LEAVE YOUH TOYS AT HOME ON A SUNDAY ! ”
Johnny {quick, hut impudent). “ Then why do you come out with your Hoop '? ”
SACRED BEAR GARDENS.
Deprecating the enactment o|
the proposed Nonconformists5
Burial Bill, the Morning Post, in a
recent article, argued tliat if bhat
measure became law, and dissent-
ing ministers were accordingly em-
powered to read funeral services
in Church burning grounds, Mie
nest concession Dissenters would
demand would be that of liberty
to perform part of the service also
within the churches. And then•
“ Once throw the churches open to
all sorts and conditions of modern dis-
sent, and there will be no end to the con-
fusion. Disputes will arise as to the
modes of service, the relative claims to
this or that portion of the ground, and
to this or that time of the day for service.’
Yes; and disputes may even
arise as to the costume wherein
the minister is to officiate. The
consequences may be hissing, hoot-
ing, whistling, stamping, coughing,
crowing, scuffling, and fighting. In
churches open to Dissenters differ-
ing from one another, it certainly
is very probable that there would
sometimes be rows resembling
those which, within the memory of
man, have occurred at St. Barnabas,
Pimlico, and St. George’s-in-the-
East.
your Top. Yrou
A Fatal Mistake,
Foolhardy buffoons sometimes
attempt too much. They risk their
necks as extraordinary acrobats,
and turn out to be mere tumblers.
PUNCH’S ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.
April 22, Monday. British subjects who possess personal property
have no business abroad, because, if they have the means of living in
England, where, only, Punch can be procured on the day of publication,
it is wantonly making light of their privileges to be out of the way of
that great advantage. However, there may be exceptional cases, "and
as at present no British subject who makes a Will when he is abroad
has the slightest certainty that he has made it in the proper way, and
as the personalty is pretty sure to be expended in the personalities of
law, Lord Kingsdown (Mr, P. Leigh) is to be commended for
bringing in a Bill to provide that a will of personalty shall be valid,
whether made according to the law in foreign parts/or according to
the domicile of the testator. The excellent Post Office Savings’ Bank
Bill went through Second Reading, but the intelligent British public,
into whose head it is excessively difficult to beat any new system (and
which still directs its letters to “ James Thompson, Esq., 300, Cheap-
side, E.C.,” because that name and address were given in the form
issued by Sir Rowland) must understand that it is not to regard the
letter-slits in the light of the slit in the domestic money-box, nor to
suppose that if a penny is dropped into the letter-column at Hammer-
smith, it may be asked for at the receiving-house at Poplar that day
two years, Mr. Punch foresees a good deal of trouble to himself iu
getting this new system into gear, but the object is so good that he
intends to take the public in hand.
Lord Raynham proposed to Mr.. Gladstone to lay a tax on
Linendrapers’ Shopmen, in order to drive those elegant beings to more
manly work, and to substitute women behind the counters. Mr.
Gladstone said that it might not be unfair to do something for
women, especially as in some trades a systematic resistance is made by
the men to the employment of feminine labour, but he did not quite
see his way to getting coin out of the counterjumper.
The Budget Debate began, and went, through this night and that of
Thursday, when it was adjourned until the Monday following. Mr.
Thomas Baring made an elaborate speech against the Budget, and
thought that we ought to look forward to a deplorable financial future
and not remit taxes. Mr. White said—what can it matter what Mr.
"White said P Mr. Baxter defended the scheme of Mr. Gladstone,
and the battledore and shuttlecock business continued until midnight,
Mr. Rentinck’s tirade against things in general being the most
amusing feature of the evening. There was much grumbling, but the
Opposition did not offer to fight.
Tuesday. Sir Joseph Paxton, with the instinot of a true lover of
the Landscape, demanded whether Government really contemplated
the letting the Agricultural Society bring their fat pigs, ploughing
machines, and mangle wurzle (spell it right, Wiscount) into Hyde
Park in 1862? Mr. Cowper made an evasive kind of answer, and
thought that “ some ” park might be used for the purpose. Mr. Punch
hereby invites Sir Joseph to stick to this party Cowper, who is a
good man, but has no moral pluck, and would give up the Queen’s
private flower-garden if Swelldom put the screw upon him. He may
stick the beasts in Battersea Park, if he likes, as there is nothing to
spoil, and nobody goes there, and it would be the making of the
locality. But we really cannot have the other place desecrated, though
cattle may not seem out of place in Hide Park, as it was originally
called.
Mr. Berkeley brought on his Ballot motion. He is a valiant old
man, but Punch is reminded of a fine passage in the Lord of the Isles.
The Ballot battle stagnates :—
“ Douglas leans on his war-sword now.
And Williams wipes his moistened brow.
Dgncombe undoes his vizor clasp,
And Atherton for air must gasp,
And Bernal Osborne quits his spear.
And sinks thy falchion, Bass of Beer,
The blows of Berkeley fall less fast,
And gallant Gibson's bugle blast
Has lost its lively tone,
Sinks, brave John Bright, thy battle-word,
And Brady’s shout is fainter heard,
‘ Mee merry men, foigbt on.’ ”
It will be evident to an acute reader that Mr. Punch introduced this-
citation chiefly because Berkeley and Douglas, being proposer and
seconder of the motion, two of Sir Walter’s lines can be given in-
tact, and Mr. P. distinctly states that he has not the slightest reason
for affirming that the Solicitor-General was out of breath, or that
the Wiscount had a tendency to perspiration. To return to our sheeps
—when the said mover and seconder had affirmed that the Ballot
would bring in the Millennium, the House “answered not but with its
legs,” as Morose, in The Silent Woman, desires Outbeard to do. It
walked into the lobby, and declined the Berkleian Millennium by 279
to
PUNCH, OR 1
LONDON CHARIVARI.
179
Sunday-School Teacher. Oh, Johnny, I’m Shocked to see you Playing with
SHOULD LEAVE YOUH TOYS AT HOME ON A SUNDAY ! ”
Johnny {quick, hut impudent). “ Then why do you come out with your Hoop '? ”
SACRED BEAR GARDENS.
Deprecating the enactment o|
the proposed Nonconformists5
Burial Bill, the Morning Post, in a
recent article, argued tliat if bhat
measure became law, and dissent-
ing ministers were accordingly em-
powered to read funeral services
in Church burning grounds, Mie
nest concession Dissenters would
demand would be that of liberty
to perform part of the service also
within the churches. And then•
“ Once throw the churches open to
all sorts and conditions of modern dis-
sent, and there will be no end to the con-
fusion. Disputes will arise as to the
modes of service, the relative claims to
this or that portion of the ground, and
to this or that time of the day for service.’
Yes; and disputes may even
arise as to the costume wherein
the minister is to officiate. The
consequences may be hissing, hoot-
ing, whistling, stamping, coughing,
crowing, scuffling, and fighting. In
churches open to Dissenters differ-
ing from one another, it certainly
is very probable that there would
sometimes be rows resembling
those which, within the memory of
man, have occurred at St. Barnabas,
Pimlico, and St. George’s-in-the-
East.
your Top. Yrou
A Fatal Mistake,
Foolhardy buffoons sometimes
attempt too much. They risk their
necks as extraordinary acrobats,
and turn out to be mere tumblers.
PUNCH’S ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.
April 22, Monday. British subjects who possess personal property
have no business abroad, because, if they have the means of living in
England, where, only, Punch can be procured on the day of publication,
it is wantonly making light of their privileges to be out of the way of
that great advantage. However, there may be exceptional cases, "and
as at present no British subject who makes a Will when he is abroad
has the slightest certainty that he has made it in the proper way, and
as the personalty is pretty sure to be expended in the personalities of
law, Lord Kingsdown (Mr, P. Leigh) is to be commended for
bringing in a Bill to provide that a will of personalty shall be valid,
whether made according to the law in foreign parts/or according to
the domicile of the testator. The excellent Post Office Savings’ Bank
Bill went through Second Reading, but the intelligent British public,
into whose head it is excessively difficult to beat any new system (and
which still directs its letters to “ James Thompson, Esq., 300, Cheap-
side, E.C.,” because that name and address were given in the form
issued by Sir Rowland) must understand that it is not to regard the
letter-slits in the light of the slit in the domestic money-box, nor to
suppose that if a penny is dropped into the letter-column at Hammer-
smith, it may be asked for at the receiving-house at Poplar that day
two years, Mr. Punch foresees a good deal of trouble to himself iu
getting this new system into gear, but the object is so good that he
intends to take the public in hand.
Lord Raynham proposed to Mr.. Gladstone to lay a tax on
Linendrapers’ Shopmen, in order to drive those elegant beings to more
manly work, and to substitute women behind the counters. Mr.
Gladstone said that it might not be unfair to do something for
women, especially as in some trades a systematic resistance is made by
the men to the employment of feminine labour, but he did not quite
see his way to getting coin out of the counterjumper.
The Budget Debate began, and went, through this night and that of
Thursday, when it was adjourned until the Monday following. Mr.
Thomas Baring made an elaborate speech against the Budget, and
thought that we ought to look forward to a deplorable financial future
and not remit taxes. Mr. White said—what can it matter what Mr.
"White said P Mr. Baxter defended the scheme of Mr. Gladstone,
and the battledore and shuttlecock business continued until midnight,
Mr. Rentinck’s tirade against things in general being the most
amusing feature of the evening. There was much grumbling, but the
Opposition did not offer to fight.
Tuesday. Sir Joseph Paxton, with the instinot of a true lover of
the Landscape, demanded whether Government really contemplated
the letting the Agricultural Society bring their fat pigs, ploughing
machines, and mangle wurzle (spell it right, Wiscount) into Hyde
Park in 1862? Mr. Cowper made an evasive kind of answer, and
thought that “ some ” park might be used for the purpose. Mr. Punch
hereby invites Sir Joseph to stick to this party Cowper, who is a
good man, but has no moral pluck, and would give up the Queen’s
private flower-garden if Swelldom put the screw upon him. He may
stick the beasts in Battersea Park, if he likes, as there is nothing to
spoil, and nobody goes there, and it would be the making of the
locality. But we really cannot have the other place desecrated, though
cattle may not seem out of place in Hide Park, as it was originally
called.
Mr. Berkeley brought on his Ballot motion. He is a valiant old
man, but Punch is reminded of a fine passage in the Lord of the Isles.
The Ballot battle stagnates :—
“ Douglas leans on his war-sword now.
And Williams wipes his moistened brow.
Dgncombe undoes his vizor clasp,
And Atherton for air must gasp,
And Bernal Osborne quits his spear.
And sinks thy falchion, Bass of Beer,
The blows of Berkeley fall less fast,
And gallant Gibson's bugle blast
Has lost its lively tone,
Sinks, brave John Bright, thy battle-word,
And Brady’s shout is fainter heard,
‘ Mee merry men, foigbt on.’ ”
It will be evident to an acute reader that Mr. Punch introduced this-
citation chiefly because Berkeley and Douglas, being proposer and
seconder of the motion, two of Sir Walter’s lines can be given in-
tact, and Mr. P. distinctly states that he has not the slightest reason
for affirming that the Solicitor-General was out of breath, or that
the Wiscount had a tendency to perspiration. To return to our sheeps
—when the said mover and seconder had affirmed that the Ballot
would bring in the Millennium, the House “answered not but with its
legs,” as Morose, in The Silent Woman, desires Outbeard to do. It
walked into the lobby, and declined the Berkleian Millennium by 279
to