DOI issue:
June 1, 1861
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16867#0236
228 PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [June l, 1861.
DAY BEFORE THE DERBY.
Costermonger (loq.) “ Ax yer 'pardon, Miss, hut I must get ye to take a double 'lowance o' greens to-day, as to-morrow's the Derby."
In all hues from fierce copper to deep greeD,
The men whom England most delights to honour ?
“ Grey talks of ‘ storied urns,’ but never urn
Such stories told as statues now-a-days.
When will revived iconoclasm o’erturn
These bronze and marble monsters from our ways P
“ A bookmaking biographer well known *
The name of ‘ One of Death’s new terrors ’ bears;
Bebnes and Adams might the title own,
Who work such libels on our clay with theirs.
“ Nor satisfied with one guy, ten feet long,
At Charing Cross perpetuate in copper,
Bkbnes in Sunderland repeats the w.ontr.
And there too ven s of me a b zen wh pper.
“ England—of heroes mother—spend thy sons,
But doom them not, thus, to pod mortem laughter:
Those that have died, like me, firm at their guns,
Ne’er looked to stand thus in the pillory, after! ”
“ Sanguinary Mendicant.”
In spite of what M. de Montalembert may insinuate to the com ||
trary, we cannot imagine any such words as “ sanguinary mendicant ”
dropping from the classic lips of the Chancellor oe the Exchequer,.
even though the subject he was speaking of was the Pope, and we
only allude to them for the purpose of indulging in the absurd suppo- j
sition that a “sanguinary mendicant” must be one who gets his living
by means of “ blood-money.”
A Civil Contingency :—The exchange of civility on the road,
returning home from the Derby. We should not like to bet much
on such a contingency.
HAVELOCK’S HUMBLE PETITION.
* What I have done is done : my country’s gratitude—
Amply has been expressed to me and mine ;
In every form of paraphrase and platitude
Employed where Englishmen in public dine.
“ My birth-place is recorded in topography ;
In print and out of print I have been mourned ;
Done, overdone, in pietist biography,
My moral pointed, and my tale adorned.
“ A grey-haired subaltern the Horseguards left me,
Too poor to purchase, too proud to despair;
Of all save faith and fight years had bereft me,
When sunset glory lit on my grey hair.
“ And I, whose long day passed in the cold shade,
Went to my grave, at last, in dazzling light:
Happier that I had served my country’s need.
Than in the fame which came so close on night.
" Respect my modest life, and leave my name
Where my own hand has set it—on the roll
Of Indian war: at least, let meddling Fame
With no more Statues vex my patient soul.
“ Although a Christian, I was not a Guy,
My head and body were in due proportion ;
I was not that which Behnes sets on high,—
A short-legged hydrocephalous abortion.
“ Wherefore, to Napier’s and my disgrace,
Should Britain thus to sky her coppers dare.
With heads and tails like those that so deface
Our twin unlikenesses, in that sad Square,
“ Where pilloried in effigy are seen,
(Worse martyrs man those burnt by Bishop Bonner)
DAY BEFORE THE DERBY.
Costermonger (loq.) “ Ax yer 'pardon, Miss, hut I must get ye to take a double 'lowance o' greens to-day, as to-morrow's the Derby."
In all hues from fierce copper to deep greeD,
The men whom England most delights to honour ?
“ Grey talks of ‘ storied urns,’ but never urn
Such stories told as statues now-a-days.
When will revived iconoclasm o’erturn
These bronze and marble monsters from our ways P
“ A bookmaking biographer well known *
The name of ‘ One of Death’s new terrors ’ bears;
Bebnes and Adams might the title own,
Who work such libels on our clay with theirs.
“ Nor satisfied with one guy, ten feet long,
At Charing Cross perpetuate in copper,
Bkbnes in Sunderland repeats the w.ontr.
And there too ven s of me a b zen wh pper.
“ England—of heroes mother—spend thy sons,
But doom them not, thus, to pod mortem laughter:
Those that have died, like me, firm at their guns,
Ne’er looked to stand thus in the pillory, after! ”
“ Sanguinary Mendicant.”
In spite of what M. de Montalembert may insinuate to the com ||
trary, we cannot imagine any such words as “ sanguinary mendicant ”
dropping from the classic lips of the Chancellor oe the Exchequer,.
even though the subject he was speaking of was the Pope, and we
only allude to them for the purpose of indulging in the absurd suppo- j
sition that a “sanguinary mendicant” must be one who gets his living
by means of “ blood-money.”
A Civil Contingency :—The exchange of civility on the road,
returning home from the Derby. We should not like to bet much
on such a contingency.
HAVELOCK’S HUMBLE PETITION.
* What I have done is done : my country’s gratitude—
Amply has been expressed to me and mine ;
In every form of paraphrase and platitude
Employed where Englishmen in public dine.
“ My birth-place is recorded in topography ;
In print and out of print I have been mourned ;
Done, overdone, in pietist biography,
My moral pointed, and my tale adorned.
“ A grey-haired subaltern the Horseguards left me,
Too poor to purchase, too proud to despair;
Of all save faith and fight years had bereft me,
When sunset glory lit on my grey hair.
“ And I, whose long day passed in the cold shade,
Went to my grave, at last, in dazzling light:
Happier that I had served my country’s need.
Than in the fame which came so close on night.
" Respect my modest life, and leave my name
Where my own hand has set it—on the roll
Of Indian war: at least, let meddling Fame
With no more Statues vex my patient soul.
“ Although a Christian, I was not a Guy,
My head and body were in due proportion ;
I was not that which Behnes sets on high,—
A short-legged hydrocephalous abortion.
“ Wherefore, to Napier’s and my disgrace,
Should Britain thus to sky her coppers dare.
With heads and tails like those that so deface
Our twin unlikenesses, in that sad Square,
“ Where pilloried in effigy are seen,
(Worse martyrs man those burnt by Bishop Bonner)