Punch (43.1862)

augus'i 23 1362.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.





ROMAN PASTORAL POETRY.

5H ecclesiastics, some
of them, are not im-
properly called old
women, but there is
strong reason for re-
garding the Archbi-
shop op Nimes as a
young lady. That pre-
late has addressed to
his flock, which should
consist of geese, a pas-
toral couched in the
usual flowery language
of Ultramontane hum-
bug ; a pastoral which
no pastor, one would
think, could have com-
posed but a Cory don.
It contains the follow-
ing description of the
Pope’s personal attrac-
tions :—

‘ ‘ That limpid loving look,
that enchanting smile
which beams eternally,
whilst from his lips fall dis-
tilled honey, words which
scatter the perfume of his
heart."

This cannot be the language of a man writing about another man. It can only be
that of an enthusiastic girl describing auother girl. The Pope is a very charming
person by that account.. What else could you expect from such a pretty Pope than
distilled honey and odoriferous language ?—though to heretical noses the perfume
of his heart would, if perceptible, be not very agreeable : for heretics hold the only
heart that smells nice to be a calf’s heart stuffed. Well; why, perhaps one would
be incbned to suppose that so beautiful a Pontiff would, as the Archbishop oi
Nimes informs us that Pros does, rather frequently give vent to “tears, sighs,
burning expressions of tenderness.” Such a gushing Pope as this never before
existed, unless we are to believe in the pontificate of Pope Joan. A Pope with a
“ limpid loving look,” and an “ enchanting smile,” lips which shed “ distilled honey,”
and feelings that find expression in “ tears, sighs, burning expressions of tender-
ness,” is surely a Pope affected with hysteria, a Pope under whose nose it is often
necessary to burn feathers, a Pope who is obliged to take much sal volatile, a
Pope well qualified to bear the name of Joan, or Julia. Petticoats and wliite
satin shoes are apparel suitable to the sex of a Pope of that description; who might
sit in the Chair of Peter for Venus attired by the Graces, inclusive of her Grace
the Archbishop op NImes.

The liberal world would rejoice if effect could be given to the aspiration thus
expressed by this epicene if not feminine prelate, with a characteristic interjec-
tion :—

“Ah ! it makes us wish to melt away and become nothing for the honour and grandeur of
our beloved Pontiff.”

The gratification of this wish would leave the Emperor op the French, unim-
peded by seditious churchmen, at liberty to deal with the Pope alone ; would be
quickly followed by the emancipation of Italy and the pacific settlement of Europe.
That desirable consummation would doubtless ensue if the Archbishop op Nimes

and all the Papist clergy were to melt, thaw, and resolve
themselves into a dew, or evaporate and, as the Yankees
say, leave nothing of themselves but a little grease spot.

“ROME OH DEATH!”

Ip Garibaldi fail,

So Chiefs have failed before;

Not always doth the Right prevail,

And what can we say more P
Forsooth that he was rash.

By generous madness led
Against the might of France to dash
His blind heroic head.

The fight has oft been fought,

And yet the battle won;

When all onlookers justly thought.

That hopeless risk was run :

The odds of high emprise
Not on the surface show,

Lie somewhat deeper than the wise
Can always see, below.

There are the Priests, whose ban
To shake Napoleon’s throne
Might happen, should December’s Man
Yield Italy her own ;

And those imperial bands,

That work bis will, are strong,

And prompt to do what France demands,
Her bidding, right or wrong.

Hearts, on the other side,

And souls there are, to (ire,

With zeal above vainglorious pride.

With courage to inspire
Nerving each true man’s hand
To fight for hearth and home,

To dare the worst for Fatherland,

And set his life on Rome.

This spirit set on blaze

Will burn how far, bow hot P
And then how much against it weighs
The force of Frenchmen’s shot ?

Learn that, ere you decide
The good cause has no chance.

Yet has that issue to be tried
Of Italy with France.

Spread but the sacred flame.

And France will not withhold
From strong Italian hands, the claim
Of hearts resolved and bold,
hukindled, one and all.

With Freedom’s fiery breath,

Incensed by Galubaldi’s call.

His cry of “ Rome or Death ! ”

SATISFIED SPECTATORS.

They have got it at last. They, the gaping numskulls, who, for
more than twelvemonths, have been thronging to stare at performances
of which the special attraction was the risk of the performer’s life, have
got what they went if not to see, at least to enjoy the chance of seeing.
That catastrophe is thus described by an eye-witness :—

“ Last night an event took place at Highbury Bam Gardens, which not only pro-
duced the greatest consternation among the visitors, hut has resulted in the most
serious if not fatal consequences to Miss Seuna Young, or, as she is styled, the
“ Female Blondin,” the celebrated rope-walker, who created such a sensation at
Cramome Gardens last season by crossing the Thames on a tight-rope.”

Attired in a “suit of armour,” having wheeled a barrow in the midst
of blue lights and fire-works, on a rope at the height of 100 feet, Miss
Young consummated the amusement which she had been affording her
spectators, as follows :—

“ A third time she crossed the rope, covered with a 3ack, and then commenced
her final tour to the starting point, in the midst of fireworks discharged from each
end of the balancing pole she carried in her hand. She had arrived within about
twenty feet of the western stage, when the Catherine wheels at each end of the
pole had reached their greatest velocity, at which moment reports were heard, and
stars of various hues were emitted. At this instant it was plainly observable that
there was a fearful oscillation of the pole, as well as of the unfortunate performer. A
general cry was raised that she was falling. The pole fell from her grasp, and the
performer toppled over. For a moment she appeared to cling to the rope, either by
the legs or hands ; but, whether from fright or otherwise, in another second she
was seen descending head foremost into the midst of the lofty trees beneath her.”

The speculators for the fall realised their expectations ! We further
read that:—

“ The scene of horror and consternation, coupled with the screams of the females
present at this moment may be wall imagined, and hundreds rushed to the spot
where the poor creature lay at the foot of a tree completely doubled up and appa-
rently lifeless. ”

The rest is—Surgery !

Leotard, who was also engaged in astonishing weak minds at the
Highbury Barn Garden by hazarding his neck, nearly broke it in bis
trepidation, by trying to jump, after he bad been “indiscreetly
informed” of what had happened to the “Eemale Blondin.” Another
“trapeze” accident had befallen an unlucky mountebank the week
before. The accident at Highbury Barn would have been prevented
if any warning could have operated to its prevention. But there
is only one warning which could produce that effect ■ that is to say if
it could possibly happen. Sensation rope-walking could only be stopped
by a martyrdom—the most awful of example?. The spectacle of a
dance on the tight-rope at the elevation of a cathedral spire, termi-
nating in the precipitation of the funambulist to the ground, would have
to be exhibited by a Bishop !

The Postage-stamps sent to pay M’Clellan’s army, have received
the name of ‘^Stampedes.”