DOI Heft:
March 14, 1863
DOI Seite / Zitierlink: https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16871#0119
112
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [March u, 1863.
Soy. "Isn’t it very naughty of Papa to tell Stories?”
Mamma. “Well, dear—it would be—but what do you mean?”
Boy. “ Why, Papa says, tha^ Toffee is Hasty Trash—and it's so very delicious,
you know ! ”
THE NATAL CORRESPONDENCE.
i.
My dear Colenso,
With regret.
We hierarchs, in conclave met,
Beg you, you most disturbing writer.
To take off your colonial mitre.
This course we press upon you strongly-.
Relieve me,
Yours most truly,
Lambeth. Longley.
ir.
My dear Archbishop,
To resign
That Zulu diocese ol mine,
And own myself a heathen dark,
Because I’ve doubts about Noah’s Ark,
And feel it right to tell all men so,
Is not the course for
Yours,
Kensington. Colenso.
The Theatre near Everywhere.
(A Card.)
Mb. Bamboozicault respectfully intimates to
the public residing at Poplar, Rotherbithe, and
Stepney, that his theatre at Westminster is the
most convenient for reach by ladies and chil-
dren from the East End, as they can easily walk
down to the Thames, on which the theatre is
situate. The same remark applies to Henley,
Maidenhead, and Windsor.
Land Swells.—The Lords of the Admiralty.
NEPTUNE’S ADDRESS ON THE HONEYMOON.
Auspicious was the steam,
Whatever were the gales,
Which, faster than Old Neptune’s team,
Unto the Prince op Wales
The fair young Maid of Denmark bore
In triumph to Great Britain’s shore.
The Monarch of the Sea,
Soon saw his nags were beat:
So therefore round the Nore ’went ha
After the British fleet,
To wait the happy Royal pair,
At Osborne, and receive them there.’
Down in the deep he dived;
There heard the shouts of England’s joy:
But, when the blissful train arrived,
Emerged like an old buoy.
Above the waves his placid head
He heaved, and blandly smiling, said:
“ Yobo, there ! Dowse' my glims!
Ahoy ! Bless your sweet eyes!
Avast, I say ! My eyes and limbs !
Could I command the skies,
I’d cause them to rain grog and flip
For all the tars in every ship.
Hows’ever, here’s your health.
Sir; Marm, the same to you!
Long life, the best of luck, and wealth
Or else—why, foul my screw!
Shatter my plates, unbolt me, rust
My armour, and my engine bust!
Well; now you’re snug in port;
Erom them landlubbers’ noise
You comes for me to give you sport.
Below, there ! Girls and Boys !
Triton and Nereids, pipe all hands, show ye
Them there young folks the pastimes of the sea.
A STREET DIALOGUE.
Scene, near G-rosvenor Square. Lord Punch meets jjord Ebury.
Lord Lunch. Ah, Ebury, how do you do ? I wanted to see you.
Lord Kbury. Always glad to meet you, my dear fellow. [Shake hands.
Lord P. Do you see that the Prince oe Wales has made Charles
Kingsley one of his chaplains?
Lord E. Has he ? Well, Mr. Kingsley’s a monstrous clever man
—plenty of snuff in his sermons—you know the story. And Hypatia’s
a grand book.
Lord P. Just so. And how do you like the Tale of a Wrater-Baby,
iu Macmillan ?
Lord E. To tell you the truth, I hate serials, and was waiting for the
complete book.
Lord P. Tell your beys to read it. When they come up to the real
Rabelais they Tl’have a jolly good laugh, meantime the story is capital.
I happen to have the new number in my pocket. I’ll read you a
little bit.
J^rd E. Ah, do.
Lord P. [reads). “ And then Tosi came to Gotham, where the wise
men live, the same who dragged the pond because the moon had fallen
into it, and who planted a hedge round the cuckoo, to keep spring all
the year. And he found them bricking up the Town Gate, because it
was Vo wide that little folks could not get through. _ And when he
asked why, they told him they were Expanding their Liturgy [pokes E.
with elbow). So he went on, for it was no business of his, only he
could not help saying that in his country, if the kitten couldn’t get in
at the same hole as the cat, she might stay outside and mew.” Tell
me, my dear Ebury, what may your theory of cats and kittens be ?
Lord E. H’m. I don’t know that I do see the point of that passage.
Good morning, my Lord.
Lord P. Habet. [Exit.
Curious Application.
Immediately on the passing of the Act for making bills payable on
Friday instead of Saturday last, several persons wrote to the_ Clerk of
the Weather, stating that as upon any day of English holidayfying
the East Wind was sure to be Due, he would much oblige by con-
formity to the spirit of the Act. The result is known.
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [March u, 1863.
Soy. "Isn’t it very naughty of Papa to tell Stories?”
Mamma. “Well, dear—it would be—but what do you mean?”
Boy. “ Why, Papa says, tha^ Toffee is Hasty Trash—and it's so very delicious,
you know ! ”
THE NATAL CORRESPONDENCE.
i.
My dear Colenso,
With regret.
We hierarchs, in conclave met,
Beg you, you most disturbing writer.
To take off your colonial mitre.
This course we press upon you strongly-.
Relieve me,
Yours most truly,
Lambeth. Longley.
ir.
My dear Archbishop,
To resign
That Zulu diocese ol mine,
And own myself a heathen dark,
Because I’ve doubts about Noah’s Ark,
And feel it right to tell all men so,
Is not the course for
Yours,
Kensington. Colenso.
The Theatre near Everywhere.
(A Card.)
Mb. Bamboozicault respectfully intimates to
the public residing at Poplar, Rotherbithe, and
Stepney, that his theatre at Westminster is the
most convenient for reach by ladies and chil-
dren from the East End, as they can easily walk
down to the Thames, on which the theatre is
situate. The same remark applies to Henley,
Maidenhead, and Windsor.
Land Swells.—The Lords of the Admiralty.
NEPTUNE’S ADDRESS ON THE HONEYMOON.
Auspicious was the steam,
Whatever were the gales,
Which, faster than Old Neptune’s team,
Unto the Prince op Wales
The fair young Maid of Denmark bore
In triumph to Great Britain’s shore.
The Monarch of the Sea,
Soon saw his nags were beat:
So therefore round the Nore ’went ha
After the British fleet,
To wait the happy Royal pair,
At Osborne, and receive them there.’
Down in the deep he dived;
There heard the shouts of England’s joy:
But, when the blissful train arrived,
Emerged like an old buoy.
Above the waves his placid head
He heaved, and blandly smiling, said:
“ Yobo, there ! Dowse' my glims!
Ahoy ! Bless your sweet eyes!
Avast, I say ! My eyes and limbs !
Could I command the skies,
I’d cause them to rain grog and flip
For all the tars in every ship.
Hows’ever, here’s your health.
Sir; Marm, the same to you!
Long life, the best of luck, and wealth
Or else—why, foul my screw!
Shatter my plates, unbolt me, rust
My armour, and my engine bust!
Well; now you’re snug in port;
Erom them landlubbers’ noise
You comes for me to give you sport.
Below, there ! Girls and Boys !
Triton and Nereids, pipe all hands, show ye
Them there young folks the pastimes of the sea.
A STREET DIALOGUE.
Scene, near G-rosvenor Square. Lord Punch meets jjord Ebury.
Lord Lunch. Ah, Ebury, how do you do ? I wanted to see you.
Lord Kbury. Always glad to meet you, my dear fellow. [Shake hands.
Lord P. Do you see that the Prince oe Wales has made Charles
Kingsley one of his chaplains?
Lord E. Has he ? Well, Mr. Kingsley’s a monstrous clever man
—plenty of snuff in his sermons—you know the story. And Hypatia’s
a grand book.
Lord P. Just so. And how do you like the Tale of a Wrater-Baby,
iu Macmillan ?
Lord E. To tell you the truth, I hate serials, and was waiting for the
complete book.
Lord P. Tell your beys to read it. When they come up to the real
Rabelais they Tl’have a jolly good laugh, meantime the story is capital.
I happen to have the new number in my pocket. I’ll read you a
little bit.
J^rd E. Ah, do.
Lord P. [reads). “ And then Tosi came to Gotham, where the wise
men live, the same who dragged the pond because the moon had fallen
into it, and who planted a hedge round the cuckoo, to keep spring all
the year. And he found them bricking up the Town Gate, because it
was Vo wide that little folks could not get through. _ And when he
asked why, they told him they were Expanding their Liturgy [pokes E.
with elbow). So he went on, for it was no business of his, only he
could not help saying that in his country, if the kitten couldn’t get in
at the same hole as the cat, she might stay outside and mew.” Tell
me, my dear Ebury, what may your theory of cats and kittens be ?
Lord E. H’m. I don’t know that I do see the point of that passage.
Good morning, my Lord.
Lord P. Habet. [Exit.
Curious Application.
Immediately on the passing of the Act for making bills payable on
Friday instead of Saturday last, several persons wrote to the_ Clerk of
the Weather, stating that as upon any day of English holidayfying
the East Wind was sure to be Due, he would much oblige by con-
formity to the spirit of the Act. The result is known.