DOI issue:
August 4, 1866
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16878#0061
August 4, 1866.]
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
53
THE ASSOCIATES
UT up your Catalogues, critics aud ladies,
Closed are Sib Erancis’s portals so
wide:
Some of the pictures are going to Hades,
Some to Be hung as the Purchaser’s
Pride.
Marking the end of this year’s Exhibi-
tion,
Punch thus exhibits one picture the
more,
Setting in view of the popular vision
All the Associates—exactly a score.
Two of them, though, have no right to be
present.
Two who have got the degree of R.A.,
Kind Marochetti, who’s looking so
pleasant,
And Richmond, the palette that’s
walking away.
Here’s the excuse, if it’s worth while to
pen it,
(Nothing in Punch is a mull, or absurd,)
The picture was drawn by our friend, Mr.
Bennett,
Shortly before the Election occurred.
A LETTER EROM AN OLD LALY.
Drat them “Bears,” I say. Ireellycan’t a-bear’em.
It’s all through them as I ’ve been well nigh worrited to
death. You know they partly caused the Panic by their
precious goings-on, and what that Panic’s been to me
in worry and wexation is more than you would guess.
The way as I’ve been worrited nobody would credit, and
they drained away my life’s blood till I really got quite
empty, and had scarcely any circulation in my veins.
Pray, dear Mr. Punch, do try and stop folks from
a-spekkerlating as they have done, and a-gambling with
their money as isn’t theirs in fact, but their customers’
who lends it ’em. And do say a word to help the passing
of that Bank Act for to put a check upon the swind-
ling—I beg pardon, the selling of bank shares. Men
who sell a lot of property which they haven’t purchased,
and then damage the same property that they may buy
it cheap, are animals whom Stock Exchange zoologists
call “ Bears,” but which I prefer to call ’em horrid good-
for-nothing brutes.
I feel all of a tremble with most wirtuous indignation,
when I think of all the misery these beasts have been
a-causing, and I have hardly nerve to sign myself,
Your most obedient Servant,
The Old Lady of Threadneedle Street.
P.S. Ruining a family, by breaking all the banks in
which its money is invested, is not yet made in England
an indictable offence. But it would serve ’em only
right to pump upon the brutes. A notice of there
having been “Another Pine Bear Watered!” might
certainly do something pour encourager les uutres.
THE SACREDNESS OE OPEN SPACES.
The right of holding political meetings in the open
air is one of those privileges of a Briton which every
true Conservative would, equally with every true
Liberal, desire to conserve. Only let them be held in
proper places, that is to say, where they are not cal-
culated to occasion a breach of the peace, or of windows,
or of heads, and skins. What are those proper places ?
To be sure they are open spaces. Let the Legislature,
therefore, make due provision to prevent all open spaces
hitherto accessible to the Public in the neighbourhood
of large towns from being enclosed. Eor the purpose
of public meetings, the more remote their neighbour-
hood is from those towns, and especially from London,
the better.
COLUMBUS EOR THE CALENDAR.
The Roman correspondent of the Post says that:—
“An enthusiastic pamphlet has been addressed to the Pope by a French prelate,
ardently advocating the cause of Christopher Oolumbus as a worthy candidate
for the honours of canonisation. The work has been translated into Italian, and is
creating a good deal of attention, but it is to be doubted whether the Congregation
of Rites and the 1 Devil’s Advocate ’ will waive such an essential condition for
cauonisati -n as the documentary evidence of the candidate’s having performed
three well authenticated miracles, although the author, whose name I cannot re-
collect at this moment—although I have looked through his pamphlet—declares
that Christopher Coldmbtjs performe t a miracle greater than that of any other
Saint by discovering a new world and converting the inhabitants to Christianity. ’
The discovery, by Columbus, of a uew world was probably as great
a miracle, and a miracle as well autbenticated, as any one ever really
aud truly performed by any saint whom the Pope has canonised
There is one miracle.
Columbus’s conversion of the new world which he had discovered
to Christianity, regarded as a fact, was no less miraculous ; and if the
conversion is not a fact so generally notorious as the discovery, it is
vet perhaps full as well authenticated as most of the miracles of which
his Holiness requires proof as a condition to canonisation some three
centuries after the saint’s decease Well, there is miracle number
two. Wanted, miracle number three. What historical occurrence
can be more readily cited? The third miracle performed by Columbus
of course was his making the egg stand upright. Let St. Yitus, or
St. Valentine, or St. Antony Bobola, beat that. There are three
miracles for the Devil’s Advocate and the Holy Eather, to attest the
sanctity of Columbus ; and if they are not satisfied with them, we
should like to know what sort of miracle, established upon what sort
of evidence, it is that they require.
AN ULTRA-LIBERAL SUBSCRIPTION.
We have much pleasure in announcing that a subscription has been
opened to raise a fluid for the repair of the windows and other property
damaged or destroyed during the late riot in Hyde Park. The name
of Mr. Edmond Beales at the head of the subscription list, followed
by the names of his principal associates of the Reform League, will
afford satisfactory proof that they repudiate the acts of the criminal
classes who took the opportunity which the meeting convened by that
confederacy afforded them, to gratify their savage passions by out-
rageous and brutal violence. The appearance of the names of Mr.
Ayrton, Mr. John Stuart Mill, and Mr. Layard amongst the sub-
scribers, will also be hailed with gratification. The numerical import-
ance of the Reform League will be forcibly illustrated by the amount
subscribed, should it prove large enough to defray the expense of
replacing the Park railings.
Something Racy.
When the Horse-Eating Society dined together in Paris, we-
wonder how many horse d1oeuvres were consumed among the viands,
and whether the horseflesh was served up a la cart. A lunatic friend
suggests that the toast of the evening should have been drunk in a
cheval glass.
SOMETHING LIKE A TELEGRAPH.
When the Atlantic Cable is completed, it is a fact, that a message
will be received in America five hours before it leaves England.
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
53
THE ASSOCIATES
UT up your Catalogues, critics aud ladies,
Closed are Sib Erancis’s portals so
wide:
Some of the pictures are going to Hades,
Some to Be hung as the Purchaser’s
Pride.
Marking the end of this year’s Exhibi-
tion,
Punch thus exhibits one picture the
more,
Setting in view of the popular vision
All the Associates—exactly a score.
Two of them, though, have no right to be
present.
Two who have got the degree of R.A.,
Kind Marochetti, who’s looking so
pleasant,
And Richmond, the palette that’s
walking away.
Here’s the excuse, if it’s worth while to
pen it,
(Nothing in Punch is a mull, or absurd,)
The picture was drawn by our friend, Mr.
Bennett,
Shortly before the Election occurred.
A LETTER EROM AN OLD LALY.
Drat them “Bears,” I say. Ireellycan’t a-bear’em.
It’s all through them as I ’ve been well nigh worrited to
death. You know they partly caused the Panic by their
precious goings-on, and what that Panic’s been to me
in worry and wexation is more than you would guess.
The way as I’ve been worrited nobody would credit, and
they drained away my life’s blood till I really got quite
empty, and had scarcely any circulation in my veins.
Pray, dear Mr. Punch, do try and stop folks from
a-spekkerlating as they have done, and a-gambling with
their money as isn’t theirs in fact, but their customers’
who lends it ’em. And do say a word to help the passing
of that Bank Act for to put a check upon the swind-
ling—I beg pardon, the selling of bank shares. Men
who sell a lot of property which they haven’t purchased,
and then damage the same property that they may buy
it cheap, are animals whom Stock Exchange zoologists
call “ Bears,” but which I prefer to call ’em horrid good-
for-nothing brutes.
I feel all of a tremble with most wirtuous indignation,
when I think of all the misery these beasts have been
a-causing, and I have hardly nerve to sign myself,
Your most obedient Servant,
The Old Lady of Threadneedle Street.
P.S. Ruining a family, by breaking all the banks in
which its money is invested, is not yet made in England
an indictable offence. But it would serve ’em only
right to pump upon the brutes. A notice of there
having been “Another Pine Bear Watered!” might
certainly do something pour encourager les uutres.
THE SACREDNESS OE OPEN SPACES.
The right of holding political meetings in the open
air is one of those privileges of a Briton which every
true Conservative would, equally with every true
Liberal, desire to conserve. Only let them be held in
proper places, that is to say, where they are not cal-
culated to occasion a breach of the peace, or of windows,
or of heads, and skins. What are those proper places ?
To be sure they are open spaces. Let the Legislature,
therefore, make due provision to prevent all open spaces
hitherto accessible to the Public in the neighbourhood
of large towns from being enclosed. Eor the purpose
of public meetings, the more remote their neighbour-
hood is from those towns, and especially from London,
the better.
COLUMBUS EOR THE CALENDAR.
The Roman correspondent of the Post says that:—
“An enthusiastic pamphlet has been addressed to the Pope by a French prelate,
ardently advocating the cause of Christopher Oolumbus as a worthy candidate
for the honours of canonisation. The work has been translated into Italian, and is
creating a good deal of attention, but it is to be doubted whether the Congregation
of Rites and the 1 Devil’s Advocate ’ will waive such an essential condition for
cauonisati -n as the documentary evidence of the candidate’s having performed
three well authenticated miracles, although the author, whose name I cannot re-
collect at this moment—although I have looked through his pamphlet—declares
that Christopher Coldmbtjs performe t a miracle greater than that of any other
Saint by discovering a new world and converting the inhabitants to Christianity. ’
The discovery, by Columbus, of a uew world was probably as great
a miracle, and a miracle as well autbenticated, as any one ever really
aud truly performed by any saint whom the Pope has canonised
There is one miracle.
Columbus’s conversion of the new world which he had discovered
to Christianity, regarded as a fact, was no less miraculous ; and if the
conversion is not a fact so generally notorious as the discovery, it is
vet perhaps full as well authenticated as most of the miracles of which
his Holiness requires proof as a condition to canonisation some three
centuries after the saint’s decease Well, there is miracle number
two. Wanted, miracle number three. What historical occurrence
can be more readily cited? The third miracle performed by Columbus
of course was his making the egg stand upright. Let St. Yitus, or
St. Valentine, or St. Antony Bobola, beat that. There are three
miracles for the Devil’s Advocate and the Holy Eather, to attest the
sanctity of Columbus ; and if they are not satisfied with them, we
should like to know what sort of miracle, established upon what sort
of evidence, it is that they require.
AN ULTRA-LIBERAL SUBSCRIPTION.
We have much pleasure in announcing that a subscription has been
opened to raise a fluid for the repair of the windows and other property
damaged or destroyed during the late riot in Hyde Park. The name
of Mr. Edmond Beales at the head of the subscription list, followed
by the names of his principal associates of the Reform League, will
afford satisfactory proof that they repudiate the acts of the criminal
classes who took the opportunity which the meeting convened by that
confederacy afforded them, to gratify their savage passions by out-
rageous and brutal violence. The appearance of the names of Mr.
Ayrton, Mr. John Stuart Mill, and Mr. Layard amongst the sub-
scribers, will also be hailed with gratification. The numerical import-
ance of the Reform League will be forcibly illustrated by the amount
subscribed, should it prove large enough to defray the expense of
replacing the Park railings.
Something Racy.
When the Horse-Eating Society dined together in Paris, we-
wonder how many horse d1oeuvres were consumed among the viands,
and whether the horseflesh was served up a la cart. A lunatic friend
suggests that the toast of the evening should have been drunk in a
cheval glass.
SOMETHING LIKE A TELEGRAPH.
When the Atlantic Cable is completed, it is a fact, that a message
will be received in America five hours before it leaves England.