Punch (62.1872)

78 PUNCH, OE THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [February 24, 1872.

PUNCH'S ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.

HE ustial formality
of signifying the
Sovereign's appro-
bation of a new
Speaker was gone
through in the House
of Lords, on Mon-
day, February 12,
and Mr. Brand
made the accus-
tomed request that,
should he fall into
error, the blame
might rest on him
alone, and not on
Her Majesty's
faithful Commons.
The Speaker re-
turned to the latter,
informed them of
his acceptation, and
retired, to appear in
official costume. We
doubt not that he
will do his govern-
ing with due gentle-
ness ; but we will
hint, from Byron's
Corsair, that on
needful occasion
Punch would say—

" Be the edge sharpened of my bored old Brand."

On the same evening it was the
painful duty of the Secretary for
India, in the Lords, and of the
Premier, in the Commons, to an-
nounce that, on the night of the 8th
instant, the Earl of Mayo, Her
Majesty's Viceroy in India, had
been assassinated at Port Blair, in
the Andaman Islands, by a Mahom-
medan convict who was incarcerated
for murder. Here, no other observa-
tion on the melancholy news should
be made, except that those who had
to state it did so in the most be-
coming manner, and that the brief
responses of the Duke of Richmond
and of Mr. Disraeli were touching
from the simple sincerity with which
they alluded to their lost friend.

Nut that he is old, being in the prime of life, for he was born in 1814. As the late Robert
Brough wrote of another person—

" We only say Old Brand for fun,
He may be young and hearty—
Not, twenty-five for aught we know ;
We never saw the party."

That, however, would be another falsehood, did Mr. Punch speak in propria persona.
They have heard the Chimes at Midnight together many a time and oft.

Mr. Grieve—the "Judicious Grieve" mentioned in Hamlet—very properly asked Mr.
Lowe why he would not aid the expedition about to go in search of Dr. Livingstone. Mr. I They wish to have a right to be buried in
Lowe objected to being asked for reasons, but gave several, of the most unconvincing kind, j the Church-Yards of the Establishment,
Asked by Sir J. Elphinstone whether he knew that Dr. Livingstone was our Consul- with any ceremonies they may choose, or
General in the region where he is supposed to be —a question involving a grave consideration none. Apart from the general principle,
— Mr. Lowe did not reply. j there is affectation of belief that Noncon-

formists, bringing the remains of their
relatives or friends to be laid in the earth
would take the opportunity of delivering

Tuesday.—The Lord Ossington, hereto-
fore Mr. Speaker Denison, took his seat
among the Peers.

Mr. Gladstone gave a most wonderful
explanation of what he had done about the
Rectory of Ewelme. The law provided that
it should be held by a member of the Con-
vocation of Oxford, and Mr. Gladstone
gave it to a gentleman who was nothing of
the sort, but the Premier told him to get
himself qualified ; and "If he has not done
this, so much the worse for him," said the
Premier, pleasingly. Mr. Punch rather
admires the growing spirit of contempt for
the mere words of Acts of Parliament.

Certain Sanitary Acts, on which strong-
minded women expatiate publicly, but on
which Mr. Punch's readers may not desire
to find much disquisition in his pages, are
being modified by the Government, in
obedience to agitation by noisy and ignorant
persons, and some persons who should know
better than to talk nonsense. He must note
this—and passes on.

Wednesday.—The Commons were engaged
on a Bill regarding the Burial of Dissenters.

On the Second Reading of the Royal Parks and Gardens Bill, which is intended to protect
the public and the animals from roughs, ill or well dressed, Mr. Vernon Harcourt

denounced it as tyrannical; but a good deal of fun was made of his heroics by Members invectives againstCh^
with practical knowledge on the subject. There is no interference with Meetings, but they -j anTJL fnrmfir. nomuarm nf the kind

be held under regulations. Mr. Ayrton defended the Bill ably, and the House voted
the Second Reading by 183 to 36.

Lately, sundry Telegraph Clerks struck, and wished all their brethren to do the same.
To promote this object, some of them in the country furnished newspaper correspondents
with the information, which was not true, that the strike was becoming prevalent. The
whole public service might have been stopped but for the courage of Mr. Scudamore,
who delayed some telegrams. He has been assailed for this, and Mr. Punch would have
assailed him also with the most merciless fury, but for the conviction that, in the special
circumstances, Mr. Scudamore did a laudable act. The inviolability of telegrams and
other communications is a thing Mr. Punch would fight for like twenty thousand Fiends,
but for public servants to use public wires for the confusion and discomfiture of the public
is another matter. If Mr. Punch caught his servant at the Sacred Desk, using the Immortal
Monogram paper, and scrawling, "Come and break Master's winders," it is possible that
the domestic might not be entirely pleased with the result. When the Cabmen struck,
everybody wanted to hang them, but their strike was far less a nuisance than the throw-
ing the telegraphs out of gear would have been. A pedantic adherence to rule by Mr.
Scudamore, and people might have been unable to hurry to their dying friends, or to
summon physicians, and all because some clerks wanted more salary. The Postmaster-
General had not the courage to say this, when the excellent Member for Westminster,
Mr. W. H. Smith, called on him to-day for a certain explanation, and therefore Mr.
Punch says it for Mr. Monsell.

A Mines Bill and a Scotch Education Bill have been put before Parliament. The one
seems to have merit. Wad we hae the presumption to understand the tither ?

When will Englishmen understand one
another ? " The Bill was read a Second
Time by 179 to 108, but of course will not
at present become law.

Thursday.—The Collier night in the
Lords. This was a good night, and one to
be remembered. A Lord Chancellor was
baited; and, though it was about as great
a shame as the baiting the gentle old Lion,
Nero, at Warwick, some years ago, it must
be owned that there was sport. Posterity,
you are rather a bore, my son. Everybody
now extant knows what the question was,
but you may be puzzled, and we suppose
that we must tell you about it. Listen.

By a law of last Session it was decreed
that no person should be placed on the
Judicial Committee of the Privy Council
unless he had been a Judge. It was
wished to place Sir Robert Collier,
Attorney-General, on the said Committee,
so he was made a Judge of Common Pleas
for a few days. This gave him the quali-