Punch (71.1876)

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. 35

GARDEN PARTY.

happy institution
of July !
Just at its
fiercest is
Apollo's an-

?er' • p
And wit from

Parliament
begins to die,
And dullards
fill the stifling
air with clan-
gour,
And scarce a
cloudlet flecks
the azure
sky,—
Then how it
cheers the
unutterable
languor
sS|~ If a Club friend
exclaims,
in accents

Lady Psy-
che's Garden
Party."

It was as follows :—'' That this Meeting, composed of some of the
hardest-working persons in the community, regard with distrust

Rises a cool refreshing vision. Shady
Alleys of verdure—interspace of lawn—

The calm sweet presence of the dominant lady
(Last season shy as the Venusian's fawn*)—

Fair forms of beauty in their happy heyday,
Prom whose gay dreams all trouble is withdrawn—

Swans gliding on the royal river's reaches—

The maddest music and the juiciest peaches.

Can any man on such a lovely scene
Gaze, and be cynical ? Bright dresses flutter,

And bright eyes glance, and lips untouched by teen
Idyllic nonsense indolently utter :

And even the merry maid becomes a queen,

Who, fresh from frock succinct, and bread-and-butter,

French verbs, piano practice, all things dry,

Flits through the air a radiant butterfly.

any scheme for the alteration of the Prison System now in force
They moreover consider that the proposed Bill (to quote the words
of the Lord Mayor of Loudon) ' directly interferes with the liberty
of the people, and looks more like the Bill of a Continental Power
than of our Home Secretary.' "

Mr. William Sikes (who wasvery well received) said he didn't know
much about talking. He had certainly made speeches before now at
the Old Bailey, but they were always the same, and had only two
words—" Not Guilty." {Laughter.) And when he made those
speeches, they were always failures, because the jury never believed
him. {Laughter.) But here, as he had been brought up before
them, he might as well say his say. He was proud to assert that he
belonged to the criminal classes of the country, and he thought
those classes had a right to claim self-government. (" Hear, hear ! ")
Those classes made more money change hands than any other classes.
(" Hear !) Then why should they not be heard ? (" Hear, hear ! ")
This new-fangled Bill was un-English—it was unconstitutional.
{Cheers.) If it was passed, the prisons would be all alike. And
he knew the Government. They were a stingy set. (" Hear, hear 1")
Once, after a very good thing, he was weak enough to send the
Chancellor oe the Exchequer half a ten-pound note for unpaid
Income-tax ; but when he heard how they were cutting down every-
thing, how they proposed to take all the prisons and reduce the diet
probably to the diet of barracks and workhouses—(" Shame ! ")—he
m accents ^ 0-f yg ten-pound note, and used it for lighting

(I m ^' 0 > his pipe. {Cheers.) They might rest assured that if the Govern-
' ment got hold of the dear old gaols, they would make them all as
bad as Salford—{Groatis)—where a man got more work and much
less food than in London, for the prisons provided by the City
authorities were simply first-chop. (Cheers.) He begged to propose
the Resolution that had just been read by his venerable and learned
friend " the Lawyer." {Loud cheers.)

Mr. Richard de Swyndler begged to second the Resolution.
He was not quite sure that he had a right to call himself a
thief. He was a promoter of Bubble Companies. _ {"Yes, yes ! ") He
thanked them for their cordial acceptation of his claims. He quite
agreed with Mr. Sikes that they had a right to be heard. _ The
Predatory Classes were one of the most important powers in the
country. He saw before him the practical part of those classes, the
men whose energy and courage stimidated industry everywhere. If
nothing were stolen the various markets would be glutted, and labour
would come to a stand-still. {" Hear, hear !") Butthey had brothers
in other walks of life. Surely the adulterating tradesman, the
penniless spendthrift, and the fraudulent trustee might claim
kindred with them. (" Hear, hear!") The Predatory Classes
were the cause of the employment of a number of very helpless

Time, like the Thames, will linger not, but rushes

On to the glory of the evenglome,
And, ere the saffron sunset softly flushes,

The clustering carriages are ordered home.
Sum up the whole : gay words, sweet smiles, soft blushes,

Jests evanescent as the Clicquot's foam—
Perchance one maiden fair has found a lover,
And Lady Psyche's Garden Party's over.

* " Hinnuleo similis."— Hoe. i. 23.

POOE PRISONERS!

Shortly after eleven o'clock, a few nights since, a large meeting
of the Predatory Classes was held in one of the most frequented
streets in London, to consider the new Prisons' Act. A gentleman
known as " The Lawyer," but whose registered name did not trans-
pire, was elected to the Chair by acclamation.

The Chairman said that he must congratulate the Meeting upon
the admirable site they had secured for a gathering-place. They
were standing in a street in which goods of the utmost value were
stored. So they might feel sure that they had no reason to fear a visit
from the police. {"Hear, hear.'") He was proud to say that
London was one of the worst guarded cities in the world. {Cheers.)
He must claim their indulgence, however, to beg that they would
not take advantage of their position to steal anything. They were
there for pleasure—not for business. {"Hear, hear!") It would
manifestly be unfair to those employed in holding the Meeting were
the non-speakers to seize the opportunity of their confreres' absence
to do a stroke of work on their own account. (" ILear ! ") As
Englishmen he reminded them of the national motto—"Honour
among thieves." {Loud cheers.) And now he would call upon his
distinguished friend, Mr. William Sikes, to move the first Resolu-
tion. As his honourable (or should he say " dishonourable" P)
—{Laughter)—friend had not devoted much time to literature, per-
haps he (the Chairman) had better read the Resolution himself.

and witless men, who, but for them, would be probably starving in the
streets. He alluded to the Police. (" Hear■, hear /") He claimed
for the Predatory Classes the right of self-incarceration. An
Englishman boasted that his house was his castle ; it surely was most
unreasonable to take from him the right he had enjoyed from the
earliest times—the right to chose his own prison. {Enthusiastic
cheering !)

The Resolution was then put to the Meeting, and carried unani-
mously.

Mr. Fagin, junior, said that although not actively engaged in the
profession, he considered, as the receiver of stolen property, he was
as good a thief as any gentleman present, and he thought they ought
to be very grateful to the Municipal Authorities who were opposing
the new Bill. {"ILear, hear!") He begged to move " That the
thanks of this Meeting are due to the Mayors, Aldermen, Vestrymen,
and other friends who are resisting the encroachment of Government
tyranny—tyranny which would deprive the rich swindler of his
prison clerkship, and the poor thief of his customary Christmas fare."
{" Hear, hear !")

The Artful Dodger (who was received with applause)_ begged to
second the Resolution. He thought as things were getting now-a-
days so very bad any move back in the right direction should_ be
encouraged {"Hear, hear !") The gentlemen who were opposing
the Prisons Bill were certainly doing the Predatory Classes a great
service. {Cheers.) He was not surprised. Some time since he
read, a speech delivered in the House of Commons upon the _ Cor-
porations of England. It convinced him that many of the Municipal
officers belonged to their own profession. {Cheers.) He was pleased
to find this kindly fellow-feeling existing between the bench and
the dock, and he sincerely hoped it might continue for ever. {Loud

C llS GTS• )

The Resolution was put to the'Meeting and carried unanimously,
as also was a complimentary vote of thanks to the Chairman.

Before the company separated two Policemen joined the gathering.
The constables subsequently reported to their inspector that in the
crowd they were deprived of their staves, their pocket-handkerchiefs,
their watches, and their lanterns. They did. not discover the losses
they had sustained until the following morning.

vol. lxxi.

e