Punch (45.1863)

T'HE SCENE represents the most unapproachable of all Mu. Punch’s deep solitudes and awful cells. He has, after a
slight refection, comprising some ogster soup, a wild duck artistically sauced, and a few glasses of “ victorious
Burgundy,” retired to meditate, nec sine fumo, upon his own goodness and greatness, the folly of mankind, the
chances of the pantomimes being good, and other Christmas topics. To think the more profoundly, he has closed
his illustrious eyes to material objects.

A Voice. Mu. Punch !

Mr. Punch {opening his eyes). He hears with ears, as my friend Billy'—(opening his eyes very wide indeed, and then
immediately recovering his miraculous self-possession)—as you say ; and how do you do, tty dear William Shakspeakb P
and I am very glad to see you, if T do see you, and mine eyes are not made the fools of the other sentences, as you say.

Shakspeare {appears in a chair, opposite). Hid I say sentences? It seems nonsense; but the Commentators have so
bewildered me, that I forget what I wrote.

Mr. P. I forget nothing that you wrote; and shall, while memory holds her seat in this distracted orb.

Shale, {musing). What did I mean by that, now P The world, or the man’s head ?

Mr. P. Cudgel thy brains no more about it, but make thyself as comfortable as possible. Wilt drink up Esil, eat a
crocodile; or is there any other refreshment I can offer you?

Sliak. I should like a smoke.

Mr. P. The fatal instrument is in thy hand. {And, by Punch magic, the Poet is instantly seen smoking a noble pipe.)

Shak. My lad, I will tell you what I am about.

Mr. P. Eour yards and more.

Shak. Nothing is so offensive as an inappropriate quotation, dragged in merely to show that you have learned it.

Mr. P. I am tame, Sir ; pronounce.

Shak. It appears that I am to come to London next year, to be praised, and honoured, and commemorated.

Mr. P. What imports the nomination of this, Gentleman ?

Shak. I will tell you presently. Of course, 1 feel the compliment, and all that; but, inasmuch as I consider you my
representative, not to say legitimate successor, I shall take no step without consulting you.

Mr. P. Your wisdom should show itself the more richer to consult itself only, which indeed is the root, source, and
ever-springing fountain of discretion. But of course, if I can put you up to anything, put a name to it.

Shak. I suppose that I am to have a Statue. Where are you going to place it P

Mr. P. Why, you see that you were so unmindful of posterity as to write plays for theatres that stood in a quarter
which no civilised person now knows. I believe that it is covered with -warehouses. Argal, we must beckon you to a
more removed ground.

Shak. Certainly. I am the last person to be honoured bv archaeological pedantry of any kind. If ever there was a