Punch (45.1863)

4

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

[July 4, 1863,

PLEASANT.

Friend {to Noviee at Salmon Fishing). “ I say, Old Boy, mind how you Wade ; thebe are some Tremendous Holes, fourteen os

FIFTEEN FEET DEEP.”

OUR SURROGATED SEMPSTRESSES.

Thebe are no slaves in England, oh dear no, certainly not. It is true
we make our milliners work fifteen hours a day, and twenty-four upon
emergencies, but then of course you know their labour is quite voluntary.
That is to say, the girls—we beg: pardon, the “young ladies” who
slave—we mean to say, who Iserve in these establishment,s, are obliged,
that is “ expected,” to do what is required of them, and this means, as
we have said, to work for fifteen hours a day, and to work all day and
night whenever press of business calls for it. This is the trade rule,
which has but very few exceptions, and the slaves, that is apprentices,
are “ expected ” to conform to it. But then of course you know there ’s
no compulsion in the matter. This is a free country, and the “ ladies ”
who “ assist ”at our great millinery establishments of course are quite at
liberty to leave off working when they like, only if they do so they must
also leave their places. And as they most of them are orphans and have
no one to look after them, and see no likelihood elsewhere of getting
easier employment, they seldom find the courage to resort to this
alternative, and so—quite willingly of course—they submit to being
worked to death, instead of being starved to it.

Eor, bless you, yes, our slaves—we should say, our young ladies, have
the best of food provided them, and as far as mere good living goes
there’s no fear of their dying. Perhaps they don’t get turtle soup and
venison as a rule, but of wholesome beef and mutton they’ve as much
as they can eat, in fact a good deal more, for they have not much time
for eating. The only food they are short of is the food that feeds the
lungs, and for want of this it happens now and then, that they are
suffocated. After working all day long in close and crowded rooms,
they sleep two in a bed, with the beds jammed close together; and so
they should get used to stifling, for they have certainly enough of it.
But somehow now and then they are found dead iu their beds, in spite
of all the care that has been taken for their comfort. It is very
ungrateful of them, to say the very least: because, when such mishaps
occur, there is sure to be a fuss made at that stupid Coroner’s Inquest.
And then their dear good kind employers, of whom they always speak

so well, (as do schoolboys of their masters, in the usual holiday letter)—
these tender^hearted Christians, or Hebrews it may be, are called all
sorts of horrid names, and almost accused of manslaughter! But poor
dear injured men, how can they help such accidents ? Why, M’m, they
take the greatest care of their young people, and always have a doctor
haudy for emergencies. Yes, M’m, fresh air is the thing, but how are
you to get it ? Rents you know, M’m, is hawful ’igh, and every
hinch of ’ouseroom is uncommon precious. We do hevery-thing,
we can, M’m, we do assure you that we does, and as far as morals
go, combined with every bother luxury, our young ladies is most
comfortable, you may take our honest word for it. But you see, M’m,
There’s a deal of competition now in trade, and when oue ’ires
expensive ’ouses, one ’as to make the most of ’em. And so you see,
M’m, our young ladies must sleep pretty thick; but for cleanliness and
comfort their rooms is quite a pictur !

So the tale is told, and so will it be repeated, and when another
slave is stifled, good Mb. Mantalini will iieave a sigh of sympathy,
and say he’s reelly very sorry, but—but how can he help it ? Of course
by increasing the number of his work women, which would lessen
lus profits, and hiring extra houses, he might give his slaves more
sleeping room and prevent their being stifled. But, dear kind thought-
less creature, he will never dream of this, until an Act of Parliament
obliges him to do so, and the spectres of his work-rooms have a
Government Inspector.

Odd Challenge.

The other evening when a fashionable and highly aristocratic com-
pany were assembled in the drawing-room of a well-known leader of
ton, one of his men-servants dressed in livery came into the apartment,
and without any provocation called his master out. The mystery will
soon, we hear, be cleared up.

Managerial Motto (fob the Ghost Houses).—“ He who
Peppers most highly is certain to please.”