DOI issue:
July 22, 1865
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16876#0042
30
[Jolt 22, 1865.
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
No. 4 —NO NEED TO DESTROY THE LABOURER’S COTTAGE,—
BUT RATHER ENCOURAGE HIM TO LIVE THEREIN.
THE LAW OF SELF DEFENCE.
The remarks of the venerable Chief Baron are mostly so replete with
common sense that the ensuing extract from his summing up, on the
trial of Mr. Debenham, as given in the Times, may surely be supposed
to have been strangely modified by the pen of a generally correct
reporter:—
“ It was not of much consequence to consider whether or not the house had been
attempted to be entered before by burglars, though one would think that if such
attempts were made, the prisoner ought to have been the more cool and cautious.”
From being used to it ? A man’s house has been several times broken
open, and therefore he ought to be able to take an apparent attempt to
break into it coolly! This is what the Lord Chief Baron is made to
say. Lord Dundreary would hardly have said it. His Lordship is
represented to have proceeded to lay down the law thus
“ There were undoubtedly circumstances in which the firing of a pistol would be
justifiable—those, for instance, in which a burglar entered a house, or was about to
enter one, with all the implements of housebreaking upon him, and there were no
other means of preventing the loss of life, or property, or both.”
It is possible that the words above quoted may have really been those
of the learned Judge who presided at Mr. Debenham’s trial. The
Chief Baron was obliged to law down the law as it is. It is the law
then, and not the Coief Baron personally, that tells you that you are
justified in firing at a burglar only under circumstances which it is
impossible for you to know. You are at liberty to shoot a burglar only
in case you are quite certain that he has skeleton keys, and a “jemmy,”
and a life preserver, or some other deadly weapon in his pockets, and
that he will surely attempt to rob you or murder you, or both, even if
you give him the chance of stealing off. Dogberry, in his charge to the
watch, said something very much of this sort, which the Lord Chief
Baron had to say in his charge to the jury. But Dogberry was dic-
tating, not laying down, the law, and the law was Dogberry's own, and
therefore Dogberry, personifying the law, deserved to be written down
an ass.
THE DESCENDANTS OF HEROES.
WATERLOO.
To my Tenants.
“ You will vote exactly as you
please. I have neither the right
as a Peer, nor the wish as a Land-
lord, to dictate to any of my tenants
as to the mode in which he shall
exercise the trust confided to him
by the Constitution.”
ramilies.
To my Tenants.
“ My horses shall fetch such of
you as vote for my man, Barnett ;
my Estates clerks shall take down
your names at the poll. You may
go through my Park of Blenheim,
thus saving miles (the Liberals
shall not go through), and you will
have heard from my steward and
agent what will be thought of those
who vote for Mr. Henry.
Wellington.
Marlborough.
BY FERMISSION OF MISS MARIE WILTON.
“ War to the Knife” against the high price of Butchers’ Meat,
THE OBJECTIVE MINI).
(A Song by a Cynic.)
Air,—“ The Mistletoe Bough.’’
On business whenever my way I wend,
Or my time in the streets on a ramble spend.
Perpending the work I have to do,
Or pondering what may, or not, be true,
As T mark what small cause will collect a crowd,
I am often constrained to sing aloud,
Oh, the Objective Mind !
Ob, the Objective Mind !
A multitude frequently bars my path,
Arrests my course, and excites my wrath.
To stare at, what have those people found ?
It is only a horse down they ’re gathered around.
No aid can they render the prostrate steed,
Meanwhile, my progress they impede.
Oh, &c.
Blocked up is the street I fain would thread,
There is one to be buried, or two have been wed;
Nor the corpse nor the couple.that throng have known ;
The affair they ’re intent on is not their own.
They have often seen just the same sight before,
As the one whereupon they gaze and pore.
Oh, &c.
Whenever I’m struck with a brilliant thought,
And to fix the idea my mind has caught,
Stopping in one of the streets of Town,
I bend o’er my note-book to set it down,
1 find myself, as soon as I rise,
The cynosure of surrounding eyes.
Oh, &c.
My dog was run over the other day,
When he happened to get in a taxed-cart’s way.
No bones were broke, but he howled aloud,
And of course immediately drew a crowd.
I carried him home—that was much to see—
Aud a mob at my heels dogged my dog and me.
Oh, &c.
How free must the populace be from care,
That they can so readily gape and stare
At trivial things which concern them not!
Flow happy the British Public’s lot!
Their thought for the morrow must be but small;
They can hardly be troubled with thought at all.
Oh, &c.
But lucky ’tis for us, beyond all doubt.
That so many good folks only look without.
Who’d fight our battles by land and sea,
If all were thinkers like you and me ?
Let the people still feast their external sight.
If they get in your way, never mind ; all’s right.
Oh, &c.
[Jolt 22, 1865.
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
No. 4 —NO NEED TO DESTROY THE LABOURER’S COTTAGE,—
BUT RATHER ENCOURAGE HIM TO LIVE THEREIN.
THE LAW OF SELF DEFENCE.
The remarks of the venerable Chief Baron are mostly so replete with
common sense that the ensuing extract from his summing up, on the
trial of Mr. Debenham, as given in the Times, may surely be supposed
to have been strangely modified by the pen of a generally correct
reporter:—
“ It was not of much consequence to consider whether or not the house had been
attempted to be entered before by burglars, though one would think that if such
attempts were made, the prisoner ought to have been the more cool and cautious.”
From being used to it ? A man’s house has been several times broken
open, and therefore he ought to be able to take an apparent attempt to
break into it coolly! This is what the Lord Chief Baron is made to
say. Lord Dundreary would hardly have said it. His Lordship is
represented to have proceeded to lay down the law thus
“ There were undoubtedly circumstances in which the firing of a pistol would be
justifiable—those, for instance, in which a burglar entered a house, or was about to
enter one, with all the implements of housebreaking upon him, and there were no
other means of preventing the loss of life, or property, or both.”
It is possible that the words above quoted may have really been those
of the learned Judge who presided at Mr. Debenham’s trial. The
Chief Baron was obliged to law down the law as it is. It is the law
then, and not the Coief Baron personally, that tells you that you are
justified in firing at a burglar only under circumstances which it is
impossible for you to know. You are at liberty to shoot a burglar only
in case you are quite certain that he has skeleton keys, and a “jemmy,”
and a life preserver, or some other deadly weapon in his pockets, and
that he will surely attempt to rob you or murder you, or both, even if
you give him the chance of stealing off. Dogberry, in his charge to the
watch, said something very much of this sort, which the Lord Chief
Baron had to say in his charge to the jury. But Dogberry was dic-
tating, not laying down, the law, and the law was Dogberry's own, and
therefore Dogberry, personifying the law, deserved to be written down
an ass.
THE DESCENDANTS OF HEROES.
WATERLOO.
To my Tenants.
“ You will vote exactly as you
please. I have neither the right
as a Peer, nor the wish as a Land-
lord, to dictate to any of my tenants
as to the mode in which he shall
exercise the trust confided to him
by the Constitution.”
ramilies.
To my Tenants.
“ My horses shall fetch such of
you as vote for my man, Barnett ;
my Estates clerks shall take down
your names at the poll. You may
go through my Park of Blenheim,
thus saving miles (the Liberals
shall not go through), and you will
have heard from my steward and
agent what will be thought of those
who vote for Mr. Henry.
Wellington.
Marlborough.
BY FERMISSION OF MISS MARIE WILTON.
“ War to the Knife” against the high price of Butchers’ Meat,
THE OBJECTIVE MINI).
(A Song by a Cynic.)
Air,—“ The Mistletoe Bough.’’
On business whenever my way I wend,
Or my time in the streets on a ramble spend.
Perpending the work I have to do,
Or pondering what may, or not, be true,
As T mark what small cause will collect a crowd,
I am often constrained to sing aloud,
Oh, the Objective Mind !
Ob, the Objective Mind !
A multitude frequently bars my path,
Arrests my course, and excites my wrath.
To stare at, what have those people found ?
It is only a horse down they ’re gathered around.
No aid can they render the prostrate steed,
Meanwhile, my progress they impede.
Oh, &c.
Blocked up is the street I fain would thread,
There is one to be buried, or two have been wed;
Nor the corpse nor the couple.that throng have known ;
The affair they ’re intent on is not their own.
They have often seen just the same sight before,
As the one whereupon they gaze and pore.
Oh, &c.
Whenever I’m struck with a brilliant thought,
And to fix the idea my mind has caught,
Stopping in one of the streets of Town,
I bend o’er my note-book to set it down,
1 find myself, as soon as I rise,
The cynosure of surrounding eyes.
Oh, &c.
My dog was run over the other day,
When he happened to get in a taxed-cart’s way.
No bones were broke, but he howled aloud,
And of course immediately drew a crowd.
I carried him home—that was much to see—
Aud a mob at my heels dogged my dog and me.
Oh, &c.
How free must the populace be from care,
That they can so readily gape and stare
At trivial things which concern them not!
Flow happy the British Public’s lot!
Their thought for the morrow must be but small;
They can hardly be troubled with thought at all.
Oh, &c.
But lucky ’tis for us, beyond all doubt.
That so many good folks only look without.
Who’d fight our battles by land and sea,
If all were thinkers like you and me ?
Let the people still feast their external sight.
If they get in your way, never mind ; all’s right.
Oh, &c.